The Institute of Love and Lies
by Creator0fWords
Summary: There are many couples in the League; though not all are known. In fact, most are unknown. Leona and Diana have a competition to see who can uncover the most of the hidden couples. The loser faces unspeakable punishment: DOING THE OTHER'S KOG'MAW DUTY! Much shipping. Much love. Much yuri. Welcome, to the Institute of Love and Lies.
1. It All Started With Kog'Maw

**Chapter 1: It All Started With Kog'Maw**

"Hey, have you ever noticed anything odd about Jarvan and Shyvana?" Diana asked, glancing across the dining hall.

"Mmmf? Ife notished noshing weird." Leona mumbled through a mouthful of eggs and toast.

Her girlfriend raised an eyebrow at her, disgusted. "I cannot understand a word you just said. Did your mother never tell you that it was rude to speak with your mouth full?"

Leona chewed and then swallowed. "Yes. And no, I haven't noticed anything weird with them... Apart from their usual Demacian-ness. Why?"

Diana decided to not mention anything more about Leona's manners. "Well... They've been spending a lot of time together lately. And they are always on the same team in a game. And Jarvan keeps looking at Shyvana strangely. And-" Her eyes bugged out as they witnessed something over Leona's shoulder. "A-and they... They just...-"

"Di, stop nosing into other people's business. You're making a big deal out of nothing." Leona chided, drinking her milk. "They are clearly not dating, if that is what you are implying."

Unable to say anything, Diana simply pointed behind Leona, gaping.

The Solari snorted and turned around... And then immediately spun to face Diana again.

Eyes wide, Leona stammered, "O-O-OK! I STAND C-CORRECTED THEY MOST CERTAINLY A-ARE T-T-TOGETHER! HOW HAVE I NOT NOTICED BEFORE!?"

The Scorn of the Moon swept her eyes around the other tables, pointedly avoiding the un-erasable sight of Jarvan and Shyvana-

No. Just no.

"Actually, if you look closely enough... A lot of champions are acting a bit off."

Sure enough, Riven kept glancing across the room and smiling randomly, Morgana was sighing every so often as she gazed wistfully at someone outside through the window, Ashe wouldn't stop looking towards the other side of the dining hall whenever Tryndamere stopped talking, and Zyra was continuously sticking her hands into a glass of water before her... Although that could've been normal planty behaviour, for all Diana knew.

"What do you mean?" Leona asked, snapping Diana out of observation mode (which was really just a fancy cover-up for 'spy mode' or 'gossip gatherer status')

"Look. Watch Pantheon. What does he keep doing?"

Leona observed her Rakkor friend for a minute. "Uh... He keeps bringing his fork to his mouth? And drinking his orange juice?"

Diana wanted to slam her head onto the table. "... No, dumbass. Well, yeah, he's doing that, but that's called: HE'S EATING HIS BREAKFAST. I meant, what kind of suspicious action is he repeatedly undertaking!?"

"... I don't know, that OJ is looking pretty suspicious to me..." Leona joked, much to the annoyance of her girlfriend.

"Try again." Diana growled.

Unconsciously, Leona gulped nervously and turned her brilliant amber eyes back to her childhood friend.

...

...

...

Diana sighed and bit into an apple. "You have no clue, do you."

"Heh... Heheheh..." Leona laughed awkwardly.

"Ugh. Ok. Fine. His posture."

"...?"

The Lunari could hear the unspoken question and let out another breath.

"He straightens for no evident reason and then goes back to his original position after a few seconds. As if he is trying to look a certain way whenever a certain _someone_ looks at him."

The Radiant Dawn narrowed her eyes and observed Pantheon once more, finding everything that Diana spoke to be true.

"Humph. Who's the _someone_ then, Gossip Master?"

Diana snorted at that. "We all know that Cassiopeia is the Gossip Master. My knowledge can't even match half of hers..." She glared jealousy at the half-serpent who was in the corner of the hall, sitting with her family. Or what was left of it. "But no matter... I remain vigilant!" She announced, pointing her chin skywards and slamming a fist onto the table.

"... Ok then, Great Observer..." Leona muttered. Secretly, the words 'Frozen Watcher' also popped into her head, and she glanced quickly at Lissandra, who was eating a popsicle. "So who is the _someone_?"

Diana's silver eyes turned to Leona.

"I have absolutely no idea."

"..."

"What?" Diana snapped. "I can notice what they do, but I can't see who or what they're staring at! They look away too fast and there are too many people in that general direction!"

Leona shrugged. "Well..." She trailed off once she caught the glare that she was given from across the table, daring her to question the Scorn of the Moon's observation abilities.

She quickly grabbed her glass of milk and drank it to stall for time... And a subject to change to.

"... So, uh... Did you get that letter from the Institute?" Leona finally blurted out.

Diana raised an eyebrow and crunching on her apple but decided once again to not question Leona. Even if her subject changing was so blatantly obvious.

"Yes. I cannot believe that the summoners are making _us,_ the _champions_ , take care of... THAT!" She spat, pointing at the screen to the side that displayed the current ongoing match, which was still in the champion selection stage. The Mouth of the Abyss had been the first pick for the blue team.

"Hey, don't be like that. Kog'Maw isn't... _That_ bad..." Leona started half-heartedly.

"Ugh. He's _disgusting_!" Spat the Lunari, tossing her apple core onto the tray before her. "There is no way that I'm going to take care of him!"

"Well... Look on the bright side, Di..." Leona tried again. "It's only until the Institute finds summoners to replace the ones that Kog'Maw... Ate..." Even to her own ears, it sounded pretty horrible. But she kept going. "And the champions are all on rotation! Look!" Leona pulled a crumpled piece of paper out of her pocket. "They might have found the replacements by the time you have to go! And you're going... You're going..." She trailed off once she read the names and order.

Diana fixed a glare onto the paper, and then at Leona. "First. _Today_."

"..."

Or she would've been, if there hadn't suddenly been an announcement.

"Ahem. Attention, all champions." A male voice boomed from the walls. Faintly, his voice could be heard outside the dining hall as well, which meant that it was an Institute-wide announcement. "It has come to our attention that a certain _someone_ has gotten it into their heads that it would be absolutely hilarious to kidnap the shopkeeper and replace all the items on the Rift with... With..."

The voice paused, as if the speaker were collecting his thoughts. "Pink dildo's."

Immediately, the whole dining hall erupted into raucous laughter.

"HEY! HEY! QUIET DOWN!" The summoner demanded, as if he could hear the champions. Which he most certainly could. Of course, his voice was ignored and drowned out amongst the laughter of the champions.

"Holy shit... That is amazing..." Diana managed to choke out in-between fits of laughter.

"Oh my Gods...!" Leona had fallen off of her chair.

"Pink... DILDO'S!" Ahri giggled. "MASTERFUL!" Tears were coming out of her eyes, she was laughing so hard.

Miss Fortune nudged the fox. "Hey, hey, Ahri." The bounty hunter winked. "I wonder if they still give... Penetration...!"

The fox was swept up in a new wave of uncontrollable laughter, knowing that Sarah was referring to the magic penetration items that Ahri always built.

Even Mordekaiser was chuckling under his helmet, along with Zed. Stoic Shen, who had been raised and trained to keep a neutral expression and level head, did just that, while Akali and Kennen tried and failed.

In all fairness, it wasn't _the_ most hilarious thing to ever happen to the champions... But it was certainly up there. The monotonous boredom coupled with the sheer bravery and cunning of the prankster served to heighten the joke.

"Well, whoever did it has got to have some serious balls." A lone voice rose above the others. "So we know that it wasn't you, Jayce."

More laughter, although this time, Jayce didn't join in. He glared at the speaker, who was grinning viciously at him.

Blue eyes narrowed and gauntlets prepped, Vi dared Jayce to retort. Or even better... Fight her.

The Defender of Tomorrow was about to do just that, when Garen cut in.

"More fitting of Ezreal, actually." The Might of Demacia deadpanned. Everyone knew of his sincere dislike for the explorer, stemming from Ezreal's crush on the Demacian's sister.

Lux prodded her brother. "Garen! Do not say such things!" And then she smiled at Ezreal.

Diana had finally recovered from laughing. The summoner had gone quiet, most likely to either wait out the noise, or to escape to another room to release his laughter.

"Ahh... I wonder who did it." She giggled.

Leona stifled her laughter as well. "Probably Fizz or Wukong, you know? I sense it. I also sense something happening between those two." She pointed a finger at Ezreal and then at Lux.

Diana raised an eyebrow. "While you are probably right about the prankster, I highly doubt the possibility of Lux and Ezreal."

"W-" Leona had been about to ask, "Why," when she was interrupted by the voice returning.

"Now that you have all calmed down... Somewhat." The summoner continued, voice echoing through the room.

"As we have found that the... _Items_... Still give their regular boosts and function like they should, matches will uh... Not be cancelled..."

The hall was filled with silence.

"Furthermore, it has come to our attention that the prankster who did this is none other than..."

 _'Ah, so that was why he went silent.'_ Diana mused to herself, waiting to hear the tricksters name. ' _He must have been receiving information... Or yelling at the prankster. Or congratulating him.'_

"Fizz."

Gangplank stood up and started applauding. "I ALWAYS KNEW YOU AT IT IN YER, YA MEDDLING LITTLE FISH!" He yelled, hoping that Fizz would hear, wherever he was.

The other inhabitants of Bilgewater all joined the clapping, followed by the Noxians and then the Piltovians.

Leona grinned and pumped a fist into the air. "Yes! I got it right!"

The emoji(s) that best described her feelings right now: ~(^.^~) (~^.^)~

The summoner started speaking again. "As punishment, the Tidal Trickster will switch places with the Scorn of the Moon in the new Kog'Maw rotation. He will now be going first."

The Solari's eyes widened. "Diana! That's you! You're the Scorn of the Moon!"

"I know that, Captain Obvious." Diana grumbled, pleased nonetheless. "When's Fizz going? Or was supposed to be going?"

"... Uh... In 5 days..." Leona replied, checking the schedule.

Diana sighed. "Not that much better, but still better. Hey, how about you switch with me?" She grinned at Leona hopefully.

"Hell no! Mine is in 2 weeks!"

"Aww, pleeeaaaase?" Diana begged. "Or you can do it _for_ me!"

Leona rolled her eyes. "Why would I ever say yes to that?"

Diana's expression morphed into the cute-innocent-begging look that she knew would sway her girlfriend.

The Solari stared. "Oh fuck no... Not _the look_... DI!"

 _The look_ intensified.

"I-I-I... UGH! How about a compromise?!" Leona finally let out.

Diana tuned down _the look._ "Compromise?" She repeated in a very ominous tone.

Leona gulped. "L-let's have a bet... Or a challenge! Loser has to do the others Kog'Maw duty...!"

The Scorn of the Moon grinned evilly. "What kind of a challenge?"

Leona had absolutely no idea. Stalling for time, she said, "Uhh... I'll tell you after I throw my tray out." Standing up, the Solari warrior grabbed her tray and quickly fled the table.

Eyes flicking around the room, Leona frantically tried to come up with an idea.

Her gaze alighted on Jarvan IV, who was now having a staring contest with Xin Zhao.

A lightbulb lit above Leona's head (figuratively, of course).

She returned to her table only to find Diana giving her an expectant look. "Well?"

The Radiant Dawn cleared her throat. "The challenge that I propose... Whoever uncovers the least of the League's couples has to take the others Kog'Maw rotation."

The Scorn of the Moon raised a surprised eyebrow. "That... Actually sounds kind of fun. What you are proposing is that we must each try to uncover as many of the League's couples as we can, before my rotation?" It was a good challenge, considering that the only known couples were Jarvan and Shyvana, Ashe and Tryndamere (well, they were married...), Ahri and Sona, and Diana and Leona themselves. But there was no way that they were the _only_ ones.

"... Yes."

"So we have 5 days, including today, to do this."

"... Yes."

"Sounds good. But... How do we know if what the other claims is valid?" Diana pressed. Leona thought for a second (or 5).

"Pictures?"

The corners of Diana's lips twitched upwards. "Pictures."

"Or some sort of other valid proof, like an audio recording or video. I guess."

"So if I can get a picture of a couple kissing or holding hands on a romantic moonlit walk... That counts?"

"Yeah... Any pictures."

The Lunari had one last question. "ANY pictures? What if they're... You know... Having..." She trailed off and raised an eyebrow again.

Leona sighed. "It's fine, I guess. It's not like anyone else is going to see it, and besides, we'll delete them right after. Which reminds me... End of the fifth night, we'll meet in my room to count points. If we have the same couple, that is one point each. If one of us has one that the other doesn't, then it's 3 points. If one of us proves one of the pairings incorrect, that's no points."

"Sounds good." Diana repeated, secretly thinking that by the end of 5 days, she was going to have a lot of nudes on her phone...

"Are we starting now?" She asked, and Leona nodded.

Grinning, Diana lifted her phone and snapped a picture of something over the Solari's shoulder.

"I'm in the lead!" She announced and leapt up from the table, running out of the hall before Leona could say anything.

Leona whipped her head around to see Jarvan and Shyvana _just_ pulling away from each other.

She cursed and took out her phone. Diana had the head start. Not fair.

* * *

Twitch twitched in a corner of the dining hall.

"The one time..." He muttered. "The one time that I decide to pull such an elaborate and amazing prank, that _fucking fish thing_ takes all the credit." Seething, the Plague Rat crept unseen out of the room to find Fizz.

Akali's eye twitched as Twitch slunk past her. "What is that smell?"

Her table companions sniffed the air and gagged.

"I think Singed forgot to shower again..." Kennen finally said.

* * *

 **Authors Note(s):**

Yes. I am starting another story when I have one '_' THIS close to completion and one barely 5% done. I'm an animal.  
I just... I JUST... NEEDED SOMETHING TO SATISFY MY SHIPPING NEEDS *Cries in the corner*  
Updates, you ask? Probably quite often. This story shouldn't be too hard to write... Kinda fun, actually... I think?  
Before you ask. No. No Gayren x Katarina. No Ezreal x Lux. And most definitely no Ashe x - fuck did I give that away? ;)  
Anyhoo, should I even continue this story?  
Later!  
(Right, by the way, if you read any of my other stories, I have a new thing on the bottom of my profile that tells you how much of the next chapter that I have done. Don't kill me, please... Roommates is as hard for me to write as playing against a fed Nasus .  
Anyways, LATER! IMMA GO EAT CHIPS AND ANNOY MY FAMILY AND WALLOW IN THE FACT THAT I CAN'T PLAY LEAGUE T_T  
~Creator


	2. The Mental Ward is THAT Way

**Chapter 2: Partners In Stalking**

Leona didn't know what to do.

Diana had run off already, leaving the Solari with no clues as to where to start looking.

But...

 _'Hey, there's Sona!'_ Leona thought, spotting the Maven sitting on a bench in the gardens. That one sight brought a course of action into the Radiant Dawn's mind.

Basics first: the known couples, and _then_ the hidden ones.

Pushing out the doors of the Institute and bounding down the steps, Leona walked over and sat down next to Sona. "Hey Sona!" She greeted.

Sona smiled and waved back.

"So, what are you doing here?" Leona asked.

The mute pulled out a piece of paper and a pencil, scratching something out on the page.

 _"I'm waiting for Ahri"_ Was written on the paper.

"Ah, ok." Leona replied. She contemplated something for a moment. "Say, Sona, could I ask you something...?"

" _?"_ The question was clear in the Maven's eyes.

' _Here goes nothing...'_ Leona prepared herself. Sona and Ahri were reasonable people, weren't they? And besides, their relationship was no secret...

"Uh... Would you mind if I got a picture of you and Ahri holding hands and walking through the gardens?"

"..."

Sona quickly wrote something down.

 _"Why?"_

"Well, you see..."

The Solari explained the challenge that she had going on with Diana.

When she finished, Sona smiled, nodded, and then wrote down, _"I don't mind, but we'll have to ask Ahri as well."_

"Oh, of course!" Leona replied happily. "I'm just glad you agreed at all!"

A voice came from behind the Solari. "Agree on what? I hope you're not hitting on my girlfriend, Leona."

The warrior turned to see Ahri standing right behind her, arms crossed and a smirk on her face.

"Oh! Hey, Ahri, I wanted to ask you something..."

* * *

It was nearing lunchtime, and Leona had still only gotten the one picture of Sona and Ahri. She had to admit; they were quite photogenic.

 _'I wonder how Di is doing...'_ Leona wondered, walking into the training room to get a quick session in before she went to grab some lunch.

Ashe and Tryndamere were already inside; Ashe was in the archery corner (no duh), shooting her ice arrows like a machine gun at the poor target board, and Tryndamere was lifting weights (the right one was heavier than the left one).

Leona's eyes widened. Oh, the luck! Maybe she could beat Diana after all...

Both looked over at her briefly, Ashe nodding in greeting at her many-times support.

The Solari warrior nodded back and went over to one of the many dummies to start practising, blasting it with the sun's power and shielding when it reflected off of the magic infused dummy.

This time, the warrior reasoned that she should wait for them to make the first move. After all, they were married; at some point, they would do something, right?

30 minutes passed. Leona was starting to get bored, and Ashe was _still_ shooting rapid fire at the target. The whole thing was covered in ice and arrows, Ashe having purposely aimed to cover the entire thing, leaving not a millimetre exposed. It looked like a giant pincushion.

Tryndamere was doing push-ups now, on one arm.

"500... 501...502...503...504..." He muttered to himself.

With one last perfectly aimed shot, Ashe released one of her enormous enchanted ice arrows and shattered everything on the target board, leaving no trace of her having ever been there as summoner magic mended the holes made by the arrows.

Tryndamere noticed that his wife was done and got up, lumbering over to her.

Leona casually dropped her sword and reached for her phone.

"Nice shooting, as always." Tryndamere grinned. Ashe raised an eyebrow.

"Was that supposed to be a compliment?"

The Barbarian King awkwardly scratched the back of his neck, slightly confused by Ashe's behaviour. "Uh... Yeah... I think so..."

The Frost Archer laughed. "You're so cute when you're confused." She smiled and reached up to plant a kiss on his lips.

Inside, Leona was whooping in joy as she stopped the video and slipped the phone back under her armour. Picking her sword up, the Solari warrior smiled at the Freljordites when they looked over at her and made her way out to lunch.

* * *

First target... Hmmm...

Diana sat under the shade of a tree in the gardens, thinking about how she would go about the challenge.

 _'Perhaps I should... Start with the known couples...?'_ She thought, leaning against the trunk of the tree. "Hmmm..."

"You look like you're planning something." Someone said from beside her. Surprised, Diana jolted up straight and whipped her head to the side.

How Syndra had managed to sneak up on her, she would never know. Although it could have to do with the fact that she doesn't need to actually _touch_ the ground when she moves...

"Oh. It's you." Diana grunted and leaned back again. "What do you want?"

"What, a fellow heretic can't say 'hi' on her walk?" Syndra pouted in a way most unbecoming of the Dark Sovereign.

"One, you did not say hi to me, you said that I look like I am up to no good. Two, do not refer to us as 'fellow heretics' ever again."

Laughing (or more like cackling), the sovereign sat down next to Diana. "I'm not going to waste my breath correcting to your foolish mind the fact that I did not say that you are up to no good, merely that you look like you are planning something."

Diana glanced at the mage out of the corner of her eye, deciding not to further pursue the useless conversation by saying, "You just did."

Instead, she merely looked forwards again. "What is it you want?" She repeated.

Calling the two 'friends' wouldn't be quite right. They tolerated each other more so than they did the other champions, but less so than their lovers.

(Speaking of which, don't tell Diana that Syndra isn't single shhhhhh)

Drawn to each other by their messy pasts, the two had become... Close acquaintances. The first conversation they'd ever had had been about the people they'd slaughtered; Syndra, her mentor, and Diana the Solari elders.

"Nothing. I'm bored." Syndra whined. "The pathetic summoners aren't choosing me for matches. My power, unwanted! I WILL SHOW THEM!" Her eyes started to glow.

"Calm down..." Diana said gently, scooting a little bit away from the sovereign.

Syndra closed her glowing violet eyes for a second and then breathed in deeply. She let out a breath and then said, "Ok... I'm good now." Her eyes opened; they were no longer glowing.

 _'The meditation sessions I've been taking with Zed have really paid off...'_ Syndra thought to herself.

Diana sighed in relief. "Well, if you are bored, perhaps you can help me with something..."

The Dark Sovereign laughed. "ME? _Help_ YOU? Hahaha! Weak fool, you would not need help if you were strong enough to do it yourself! The strong do not help the weak!"

Diana bristled. "I'm surprised you're not a fucking Noxian."

"I've been told that many times..." Syndra said thoughtfully.

"Ugh. I do not have the time for this. I must be off." The Scorn of the Moon said, standing up and turning back to the Institute.

Syndra floated up behind her. "Fine. Where are you running off to in such a hurry?"

"None of your business." She answered, briskly striding away.

A few minutes later, Diana saw something.

 _'Hey, is that... Leona? And... Sona?'_

Diana hid behind some bushes and watched as Leona said something to Sona. The Maven scribbled something on her notepad.

From further down the pathway, Diana spotted Ahri moving towards the pair, neither of them noticing. The fox said something and Leona turned around.

Diana raised an eyebrow, wishing that she could hear their conversation.

A minute later, Ahri smiled and nodded, taking Sona's hand. The two walked down the path, looking very much like a couple in love (which, they were...) and Leona snapped a picture.

 _'Oh, I see. Well, two can play at that game!'_ Diana fumbled for her own phone and zoomed in on Ahri and Sona. She clicked the button to capture the image.

Perfect. Now she had 2 of the 3 known couples (discounting Leona and herself) on film.

Absolutely amazing. Next target: Ashe.

"Ah, stalking people, I see."

Diana turned so fast that she almost got whiplash. "SYNDRA! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"

 _'And WHY do you keep sneaking up on me like that!?'_ She added mentally.

Syndra cackled wickedly. "Just making sure that you're not getting up to anything. And I told you, I'm bored."  
"Hypocrite! You're accusing _me_ of stalking when you are _clearly_ doing the same thing!" Diana hissed, extremely pissed off.

Syndra tapped her chin in contemplative thought. "Well, at least I'm not taking pictures of other people. Speaking of which, what _are_ you doing that for?"

"I-I..." The Scorn of the Moon struggled to come up with an excuse when her phone started slipping out of her hand.

"H-Hey! What are you doing?!"

Syndra smirked as she magically yanked the phone out of Diana's hand. "Taking your phone. Easy as taking candy... From a baby!" She laughed again.

Syndra levitated the device out of Diana's reach as the Lunari warrior tried futilely to reach it, arms flailing about wildly as she jumped. Syndra raised herself off of the ground and caught the phone, still hovering in mid-air out of Diana's reach as she opened it. The sovereign clicked her tongue. "A password? Puh-lease."

She typed in, _Leona_

Nope.

 _I Love The Moon_

Uh-uh.

 _Fuck the meta_

Nooope.

 _Fuck the sun_

*Buzzer sounds*

 _Moon_

No.

Syndra glared down at Diana. "What the hell is your password?"

"As if I would tell you!" The warrior scoffed.

Syndra narrowed her eyes and held out a hand, fingers clawed.

Diana's eyes widened and she coughed as she felt her air supply being cut off.

Holding her breath, she tried to make the air last as long as possible, but Syndra had other plans.

A dark sphere to the gut knocked Diana flat on her ass... And also knocked the remaining air out of her lungs.

The warrior flailed about on the ground like a fish until Syndra finally took pity on her. Which was when Diana's face turned purple.

Sighing, the mage released her magic. Diana greedily sucked in the air, coughing as she did so.

"So... Are you ready to tell me your password yet?" Syndra drawled.

Diana didn't want to submit. Not now, not ever. But this was a waste of time that she could be using to win the challenge. Besides, so what if Syndra saw everything on her phone...? It wasn't as if she had anyone to tell it to.

The Lunari couldn't be more wrong, but ironically nobody was there to tell _her_ that.

"Never." She said.

Syndra raised an eyebrow. "So be it."

Diana's eyes widened. "N-no! Tha-" She was abruptly cut off by a sudden lack of oxygen.

The Dark Sovereign yawned.

Diana signaled frantically for Syndra to release her, but she wasn't paying attention.

Desperate, Diana threw a handful of dirt at her.

"Bah! What the- oh, does the baby want to talk now?" Syndra taunted.

"..." Diana's face was turning purple.

"I can't hear you~!" She sang, smiling sadistically

"...!"

Syndra finally relented. As Diana tried to get the air back into her lungs, the sovereign checked the time. "Well?"

"N-n-never..." Diana gasped.

The Dark Sovereign sighed. "Ok. I've had enough of this, Scorn of the Moon. Tell me the password... OR DIE!"

"NEVER! IT-" Diana tried to say more but the air failed her the second she uttered the word. Using her last reserves, she managed to get out, "It... It's never..."

"Humm humm hummm..." Syndra sang to herself. "Ba-da da da da!"

"..."

Finally, Diana's words registered.

"Ohhhh, was baby saying that 'never' _is_ her password?"  
Wordlessly, Diana nodded.

Syndra released the magic again and typed the word 'never' into the phone. She smirked. "Ah, now that wasn't so hard, was it?"  
Diana couldn't reply.

Humming to herself, Syndra looked at the photo's. She whistled. "Wow, you and Leona are quite something."

The moon's avatar reddened.

"Ooo, so _that's_ what's under her armour... Hahaha, this is so adorable!... Oh my gosh, did you make that?" Syndra kept up her embarrassing commentary.

"Your room has a really nice view... HOLY GODS WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!" Syndra screamed, dropping the phone. Diana caught it right before it hit the ground.

The sovereign was trembling. "F-first... Sona and A-Ahri... And now... And now..."

"Jarvan and Shyvana?"

Syndra nodded wordlessly.

"Well, first off, I took the photo of them first. And second... Well, _you_ were the one who insisted on looking in my phone." Diana smiled.

"Bah! What is seen cannot be unseen! And what the flying fuck are you doing with _that o_ n your phone?!"

And so Diana finally relented and told Syndra of her challenge with Leona... If only to get her off her back.

* * *

Ashe. Ashe. Where was Ashe?!

The Frost Archer was nowhere to be found.

Not the library.

Not the Fields.

Not the gardens.

Not the bar (although Gragas was having a mid-day special, and Sejuani was taking full advantage of it).

Diana wandered into the dining hall at lunchtime, hoping to see the Queen inside. Next stop, training room.

No such luck.

Instead, Leona waved her over.

Sighing, Diana grabbed a salad and sat across from the Solari warrior. Ashe could wait for a sec...

"Hey, Di!" Leona greeted over her pasta.

"Hey, Leo..." Diana grunted.

Leona frowned. "What's wrong?"

"Apart from almost dying 3 times this morning? Nothing! Everything is just fine!" Diana sarcastically said.

Instead of getting a pitying look and a, "What? What happened?!" from her girlfriend, Leona lapsed into silence, her thoughts something along the lines of...

 _'Almost killed 3 times?! How many people did she manage to spy on?! How many pictures does she have?! NO! NO THIS ISN'T GOOD!'_

Diana frowned but decided not to push it. "Have you seen Ashe lately?"

"..." Leona was too lost in her thoughts to respond.

"Hellooo? Runeterra to Leona?" Diana waved her hand in front of Leona's unblinking amber eyes, slightly creeped out.

"... Ok then, see you later..." The Lunari said slowly, took the salad, and walked out of the dining hall to find Ashe.

"What? Oh, yeah, she was in the training room." Leona finally said after Diana had left. Not surprisingly, the lunar warrior didn't hear her.

* * *

"If I was the Queen of Freljord, where would I be..." Diana mused to herself, wandering the halls of the Institute. "Hmm..."

"If you're looking for the mental ward, it's the other way."

"AH!" Diana spun around. "... SYNDRA!"

The Dark Sovereign smirked. "Did I scare you? Boo."

"N-no..." The Lunari warrior stuttered, causing her acquaintance to raise an eyebrow.

"I didn't scare you? Is that why you jumped like Riven going after a carrot in her battle bunny outfit when I spoke?"

"..."

"I thought so."

"Ugh." Diana rolled her eyes. "What do you want... This time?"

"I'm bored." Syndra whined.

That was as good an answer as Diana was ever going to get, and she realized it too. Instead of directly asking for help again, the Scorn of the Moon decided to ask in a different fashion.

"I see. Well, have you seen Ashe?"

"You mean that albino fool that calls herself a queen?" Syndra replied, twirling a dark sphere around her fingers.

"Uh... Yes...? You're sounding like Sejuani." Diana said in a flat voice. "You could be a Noxian Sejuani, you know."

"Pffft. As if I would want to be a pathetic weakling who can't even take what she believes is hers! IF YOU WANT SOMETHING, YOU TAKE IT! And besides, I like my powers. Sejuani does not have powers. I'm keeping. My. Powers." Syndra finished through gritted teeth, eyes flashing.

"... Calm down, It's not like I can actually switch your bodies... Jeez." Diana said. But she couldn't help thinking that it would be an amazing prank to pull on the sovereign... Someday. In the far... Far... FAR away future.

Syndra closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Ok, I'm good now. Anyways, in answer to your question, no, I have not seen Ashe. I did, however, see her... _Husband..._ Drinking at the bar. " The Ionian spat the word husband like it was poison. "To be tied down to a barbarian... To have to do the bidding of such a brute... Degrading... Unbecoming of a queen... Of a WOMAN!" She muttered to herself.

Wisely, Diana said nothing. She slowly crept away as Syndra kept rambling to herself.

 _'The mental ward is the other way...'_ Diana thought to as she watched her acquaintance make hand gestures in the air. Diana slowly moved closer to the bar.

"Hey! Where do you think you're going?" The mage snapped, noticing that the Lunari warrior was trying to sneak away. "I wasn't done talking!"

"Well I was." Diana fired back, turning and making a full sprint for the bar.

Syndra shot after her, rapidly gaining as she did not need to physically touch the ground. Although, it would have been much quicker if the mage had simply used her magic to bring Diana to her but... Fun was fun!

The Scorn of the Moon risked a backwards glance only to see that Syndra was in arms reach. The Dark Sovereign smirked at her, and Diana ran faster, turning back around just in time to-

"Gaaah!"

"Oomph!"

"Pffft- BWAHAHAHAHA...!"

Diana groaned and tried to pick herself up only to slip and land back on top of-

"A-ASHE?!" The warrior gaped, barely 5 centimetres from her target's face.

The Queen flushed red at the awkward position that they were in. "Hello to you, too, Diana. Would you be so kind as to uh..." She motioned for Diana to get off of her.

"O-Oh... Right... Of course..." The warrior managed to get up this time without falling as Syndra kept laughing behind them. Dazedly, she reached a hand to help Ashe up, still a little bit stunned; both from the fall and the surprise of running (quite literally) right into her target.

Diana figured that it would be slightly strange if she told Ashe that she'd been looking for her and asked where she'd been. After all, the two rarely ever talked... Even on the Fields.

But, Ashe wasn't with Tryndamere right now... Tryndamere was drinking, which meant that...

 _'Fuck. I'm going to have to_ _ **follow**_ _her around...'_ Diana thought. And then another thought struck her, along with the observation that she'd made earlier that morning.

Ashe had kept looking across the hall whenever Tryndamere wasn't paying attention to her.

Could it be...? Could the Queen possibly be... _Cheating_ on her husband?!

Pushing the thoughts out of her head temporarily, Diana realized that she'd been silent for a bit too long.

"Heh. Sorry about that." She said. "I was being chased by a sociopath." A glare towards Syndra. "I should've been watching where I was going."

"Oh, no, it's my fault as well." Ashe said, brushing herself off. "I was a bit pre-occupied with my thoughts. I should have been paying attention as well." There was a strange, almost guilty look in the Frost Archer's eyes, which Diana caught onto pretty quick.

"Hm. Well, I guess it's both our faults, then." The Lunari warrior said. "Perhaps you will join me for a drink, then? First round's on me." Diana hoped that maybe she'd be able to pry something out of a drunk Ashe.

The Queen shook her head. "Thank you for the offer, but I will have to decline... I am, uh... Busy... Today." There it was again; that guilty look.

There was something going on behind the scenes, and Diana was determined to find out what it was. "Ok, then. Perhaps another time?"  
"Yes... Another time." Ashe said absentmindedly and walked away.

"So, I take it we're going to follow her?" Syndra asked.

Diana started. She'd forgotten that the sovereign was there.

"What do you mean, 'we'?" She asked suspiciously.

"I'm bored." Syndra said simply. "And stalking people is fun."

The Lunari raised an eyebrow. "The mental ward is that way." She pointed behind her with her thumb.

* * *

"Remind me again why I have to do this?" Syndra grumbled.

"Well, since you _insisted_ on tagging along, it's only fair that you pull your weight." Diana replied simply.

"I'm not pulling just _my_ weight, I'm also pulling _YOUR_ weight!"

Indeed, the Dark Sovereign was levitating both herself and Diana in the cramped ceiling rafters above Ashe's room door. Diana had insisted that they wait there until Ashe came along and entered her pass code in to unlock the door so that they could see what it was, and then infiltrate and stake out her room until something came up. Problem was, the beams were too small to put weight on, so Syndra was forced to use her powers to both keep them up there and to cloak them.

"What if she doesn't come out again after she goes in?!" Syndra had hissed.

"It's the afternoon, _and_ it's a weekend. She's bound to get summoned..."  
"What if _we_ get summoned?"

"PFFFFFFFT... Be realistic, Syndra. The weekends are when the bad summoners train. They won't pick us."

And she was right.

"Shh! Here she comes!" Diana hissed.

"I can see that, dumb shit!" Syndra hissed back, sorely tempted to chuck Diana straight at Ashe.

The Queen's quiet footsteps could be heard as she made her way to her room and entered her pass code in. It shone green and then the door swung open, the archer making her way inside. A few minutes later, the door opened again and Ashe walked out with a pink bag, heading towards the main entrance.

Once the Frost Archer was out of sight, Syndra dropped the cloak and gently set both her and Diana onto the ground.

"Did you get the pass code?" Syndra demanded.

"Yes." Diana replied. "I'll see you back here after dinner?"

"Mhmm."

* * *

"Hey." Diana and Syndra greeted each other like it was the most normal thing in the world for them to be in the Freljordian wing of the Institute. Checking quickly for any other champions, Diana started walking towards Ashe's door when suddenly Syndra hissed, "Those idiot summoners though."

That was code for: SOMEONE IS COMING ACT NATURAL!

"Yeah, I know right. Ugh." Diana quickly said, facing Syndra and leaning against the wall.

Braum didn't give them much more than a quizzical glance before continuing on his way.

Once the man was out of sight, Diana quickly tapped in the pass code.

It flashed red.

Syndra glared at Diana, who waved her off. "I forgot the last 'a', ok?"

The heretic tried again, and this time, it flashed green, the door swinging open.

"See?"

The sovereign merely grunted, deigning to not reply.

The two walked into the Queen's private chambers and gaped. Syndra closed the door behind them.

Elegant blue and white hues flourished across the walls in intricate designs. Tasteful, somewhat modern furniture was scattered throughout the room, and there were two other doors, presumably leading to the bathroom and Ashe's bedroom.

Careful not to touch anything, Syndra and Diana made their way through the open bedroom door.

An enormous four-poster bed took up much floor space against one side of the room, and a rather large TV sat on a table against the opposite wall.

"... Her room is like, twice the size of mine..." Diana breathed.

There was yet another door, which most likely led to the closet.

The unlikely pair closed the door behind them as they walked in.

"Syndra! Can you light up one of your balls or something?" Diana whispered.

Syndra huffed. "I dislike your phrasing, but fine."

Moments later, purple light lit the room.

"Oh... My..." Diana started.

"... Sweet..." Syndra continued.

"... Lemon donuts..." Diana finished.

The Dark Sovereign glanced over briefly at Diana in a questioning manner.

To say the closet was large would be an understatement. For the size was equal to that of Summoners Rift!

Ok, not actually.

It was large. Very large. The same size as Diana's bedroom, actually.

"Look at all these clothes..." The Lunari breathed, running a hand along a blue silk dress.

"There's enough for her very own store..." Syndra agreed, studying a pair of leather boots.

"Wait, these are men's clothes." Diana noticed, examining a black tuxedo and pinstripe pants.

"Probably her brute's."

"Yeah... Wait, why would Ashe wear these?" The Scorn of the Moon asked in confusion as she gestured to a pair of form-fitting black leather pants. "These are clearly for women, so they're not Tryndamere's... But the size is larger than all of her other pairs, and the style is completely opposite..."

"... Why the fuck would you check her size?" Syndra replied.

"I'm just observant, OK?!" Diana retorted defensively. "But-"

The sound of voices outside stopped Diana.

Immediately, Syndra extinguished her sphere and pulled Diana to a shadowy corner next to the door, casting a cloak over the immediate area to shroud them in darkness.

"... Ashe." One of the voices said, too indistinct to tell anything other than the words. "Did I tell you how absolutely stunning you are in that outfit tonight?"

"Just tonight? This isn't the first time I've worn this." Another, slightly higher pitched voice replied, most likely Ashe's.

Low murmurs, and then there was a slight scuffling noise. The pair in the closet could hear the sound of a door slamming against the wall with force.

Faintly, both Diana and Syndra could hear Ashe's voice "...Kat..." The Queen breathed.

Even under the cover of darkness, Syndra and Diana could tell that they were both looking at each other with a "WHAT?! WHAT THE FUCK?!" expression on their faces, both refusing to believe what they'd just heard.

"Ashe... What if Tryn-" The other voice said, now distinctly lower with a slight edge to it.

"He's with Sej tonight. Besides, we've come to an understanding with each other. It's just a political marriage, and we are letting each other sleep with whomever we wish." The Queen replied.

Diana flipped on her phone, squinting at the light coming off of the screen as she turned on the audio recording.

"Sleep with anyone you wish? But what of the vows you spoke when you married each oth-"

"Katarina. Stop worrying about this. It _doesn't matter._ " Ashe said in a manner very unlike her. Well, that confirmed it. Ashe, the _Queen_ of _Freljord_ , was with Katarina Du Couteau... The Sinister Blade of _Noxus_. It _would_ explain the pants, however... "All that matters is you... And me..." Ashe continued as there were some indistinct sounds coming from the other side of the door. "And the fact that we are _alone_ together."

 _'Sure you are...'_ Syndra and Diana thought in unison.

' _I still can't believe what I am hearing...'_ Diana thought. _'There's no fucking way that Katarina and Ashe are a thing. But if Katarina has clothes here, in Ashe's closet, wouldn't that indicate that this has been going on for quite a while...?'_

Suddenly, the door shook on its hinges as something (or some _one)_ slammed into it. Diana jumped and narrowly avoided smashing her head on a metal bar above her head. Syndra let in a sharp intake of breath, which was thankfully drowned out by the noises coming from the other side of the door.

Syndra put her mouth by Diana's ear (well, what she _assumed_ was Diana's ear, cuz she couldn't see...) and whispered, " _How are we getting out of here?!"_

Diana whispered back, " _I never thought that far! And why are you whispering to my shoulder?"_

 _"I thought it was your ear!"_

Thankfully, Ashe and Katarina couldn't hear them.

" _Ok, never mind that. How are we getting out of here?!"_ Diana hissed worriedly. " _I don't want to listen to this any longer than I have to!"_

The sounds got louder.

 _"Uh, well, I'm less concerned with the state of your mentality than I am with the fact that WE ARE HIDING IN THE FUCKING CLOSET AND THEY CAN FIND US AT ANY MOMENT!"_ Syndra hissed back.

" _Don't you have a cloak on us?"_

 _"It only works in darkness! If they turn the lights on, we're screwed! And the fact that you basically have a SEX TAPE on your phone now won't help your case!"_

" _If it makes you feel any better... It's still recording." Diana said._

 _"..."_

 _"Ok... Fuck this." Syndra finally decided. "Look, there's a window above Ashe's shoe rack, close to the ceiling. You can barely see it cuz it's covered by a cloth. But it looks big enough for us to fit through. If we can get through that-"_

Syndra meant to finish her sentence, but just then... Well, let's just say that things got loud.

Thankfully, Diana understood enough of what her partner-in-stalking had said. Once things quieted down slightly, the Lunari warrior whispered, " _That's perfect! Ok, can you take the cloth off with your magic?"_

In answer, the covering was forcefully jerked off of the window.

Luckily, the window wasn't actually a door into another, more secret part of Ashe's room. Instead, It led directly outside.

The moonlight now filtered in in abundance, and Diana sighed in relief. " _Ok, let's go..."_

Slowly, the two stood up and made their way over to the window.

" _Ah... Ow... I have pins and needles..."_ Syndra complained under her breath. Diana ignored her.

When at last they were underneath the window, Syndra levitated them both up so that they were level with it. Another burst of magic pushed the window open, and Diana started wriggling through.

"Wait..." Came Ashe's voice. "I... I left it in the... The closet..."

"I'll get it." Katarina replied.

Syndra and Diana shared a glance that said, "OH _**FUCK**_ NO! _**WE'RE**_ in the closet!".

Diana redoubled her efforts to get through and finally tumbled out of the window, landing on her ass on the cold hard ground outside, at least 10 feet beneath the window.

She glanced up to see that Syndra was still stuck inside, as the sovereign was not coming out.

* * *

 _'FUCK!'_ Syndra thought as the door to the closet opened, spilling light from the bedroom into center of the closet.

If Katarina so much as looked up or even a _little_ bit to the right, Syndra would be dead.

Of course, the mage could easily crush the assassin as she had unrestricted use of her powers currently, but in this situation... Katarina had the upper hand.

Where Syndra to be found out, the Institute would be able to banish her from the League for invading other champion's privacy. Which would only be worse if she killed a champion. And then she would be turned over to Ionia. Sure, the sovereign would be able to crush _them_ as well, but... Ugh. Better to just not get caught.

Desperate, the Dark Sovereign cloaked herself, even though she was sure that it would be no use, despite her body blocking most of the window. Shutting her eyes in a vain "If I can't see you, you can't see me!" hope, she didn't notice when the Noxian walked right under her and grabbed something, looked up, then walked out.

"..." Syndra peeked one eye open to see a dark room.

 _'A painless death? The Gods have been merciful on me!... FOR ONCE.'_ The Dark Sovereign thought bitterly. All of a sudden, she realized something.

She could still see the faint outlines of Ashe's clothes... Which meant... Which meant...

The cloak had worked. Syndra was still alive.

Ecstatic, the mage had only one thought now:

' _Get the hell out of here!'_

Syndra turned to the still-open window, barely noticing that no light was shining through, and crawled out. To the outside. To the fresh air.

To freedom.

The sovereign didn't fall on her ass like Diana. Instead, she slowly brought herself down to the ground while Diana crossed her arms and glared at her in jealousy.

Syndra smirked. "Don't you just love my powers?"

Diana sighed. "Well, they did help a _lot_ with this. I highly doubt Leona found out about those two, so that means I'm probably in the lead on points."

The mage stretched. "That was actually kind of fun, even though I almost died! My cloaking abilities worked better than I thought they would!"

The Lunari coughed. "You're welcome."

"Hmm?"  
Diana sighed. "I stopped the moonlight from coming into the room so that you could cloak yourself.

Surprised, Syndra stared wide-eyed at Diana. "Oh..."

Diana glanced around, ignoring Syndra's surprise. "Let's get back inside the Institute. It's cold out here, and I'm tired..."

* * *

 **Authors Note(s):**

That was really fun to write, I must admit... 5566 words, my new record!  
Confused by anything? Just tell me, It helps a lot!  
Apologies if you think that Syndra is slightly OOC... I tried my best D: but I saw this amazing post about Morgana, Diana, and Syndra, and so I wanted Diana's partner to be either Morgana or Syndra. I couldn't find the post again, but it was something along the lines of...  
 **[Image of Diana] What of those who seek the truth?**  
 **[Image of Morgana] What of those who seek rightful justice?**  
 **[Image of Syndra] What of those who seek freedom?**  
 **Why is the opposite of light considered evil?**  
 **DEFINE EVIL.**  
^ that inspired me. But yeah, I've always thought that the two would get along somewhat...  
I probably won't be taking requests, but whatever, shoot. I might just do it!  
Errr I forgot what I was going to say o-O but... Well, thanks guys, for the R&R! It makes me soooo happy you don't even know. And it's also great to see new readers than from my other stories as well! Appealing to different people, let's just say...  
More reviews, the better! I love reading them, and it helps! It really does!  
AS ALWAYS, THANKS FOR READING AND I'LL SEE YOU ALL LAETAH!  
~Creator  
WAIT I REMEMBERED WHAT I WAS GOING TO SAY!  
Lool, If anyone can come up with a better title for this chapter, I will love you forever. I had some serious trouble with that. Originally, they were:

 **Infidelity Is Not A Crime**

 **Partner's In Crime**

 **The Frost Archer's Lies**

 **The Dark Sovereign**

 **Playtime!**

 **The Mental Ward is THAT WAY**

 **Syndra, The Feminist** (Due to a deleted scene)

 **Team DS**

and

 **SYNDRA WHAT ARE YOU DOING**

... Yup.

later!


	3. Spying 101 With Leona

**Chapter 3: Spying 101 With Leona**

 **(The beginning occurs simultaneously as chapter 2)**

After a bit, Leona finally got the photo of Jarvan and Shyvana.

The Radiant Dawn was happily walking out of the dining hall when she saw Diana run straight into Ashe, Syndra floating behind them and having what looked like a seizure.

Slowly, Leona walked down another hallway without them noticing her presence.

 _'Well, looks like she found Ashe at least...'_ She mused to herself.

But now, onto more pressing matters.

Invading people's pri- er, finding hidden couples.

Leona decided to pay a visit to the library.

* * *

"Cupcake, what were you thinking?!" A voice hissed from a few shelves away. The Radiant Dawn glanced up from her book, _Spying 101,_ and gazed curiously towards where the voices were coming from.

"Vi! Keep your voice down!" Someone, most likely Caitlyn, hissed back.

Leona put her book down slowly and crept through the shelves, peeking through the books until she had a clear sight on her targets.

Vi and Caitlyn, arguing in the Manga section.

Vi was glaring at her partner. "No one's in here anyway! This is the fucking library! It's why I brought us here!"

A grin crept across Leona's face. Her hands moved to her phone and she clicked on her video recording, surreptitiously directing the camera towards Piltover's Finest and quelling her own misgivings about her actions.

"Vi, it's none of your business." Caitlyn glared back. "Besides, this isn't going to change anything."

"You're going on a _date_ with the _Loser of Tomorrow_ , tomorrow! HOW DOES THAT NOT CHANGE ANYTHING?!"

 _'Caitlyn's going on a date with the Loser of Tomorrow? Who's... Wait, that's Jayce isn't it.'_ Leona thought.

"It's not a date! It's just a dinner!"

Vi snorted. "A dinner, sure. And then after it, he'll take you back to his room, tie you up, and play-"

"Vi, no one needs to tie me down to play poker."

The Enforcer facepalmed and Leona stifled her own laughter.

"You know what, forget it." Vi growled. "Go have fun with that pretentious idiot. I'll see you some other time."

With that, she turned to walk out, but Caitlyn grabbed her arm.

"Vi. I'm only saying yes because I owe him for helping me to catch the leader of the Black Tiger gang while you were sick. I don't feel anything for him." The Sheriff said quietly.

Vi said nothing, and Caitlyn let go, only for the Enforcer to keep walking away, leaving Caitlyn standing alone (Well, sort of alone).

Leona frowned, not quite knowing what to feel. _'I feel bad that I wanted them to do something together instead of being angry and fighting. But Vi obviously has feelings for Caitlyn. Maybe there will be something coming out of this yet. And besides, Caitlyn said she didn't have feelings for Jayce. Could that mean she returns Vi's feelings? I should go to the dinner and just see what happens...'_

Patience.

* * *

The next day...

"Welcome to Summoners Rift!" The female announcer boomed.

Leona opened her eyes to the familiar sight of Summoners Rift and sighed once she got an eyeful of her team.

Darius top. Katarina mid. Sejuani jungle. At least there was Caitlyn bot.

Wait... _Caitlyn_!

"Doran's blade and a health pot please." She heard the Sheriff of Piltover say to the shopkeeper, who was wearing a bright green cloak that covered all of his features.

Slowly, he reached below the counter and brought up a red container, as well as a pink dildo.

"... Thanks...?"

 _'Oh my Gods I'd totally forgotten about that...'_ Leona remarked to herself, shivering as she got her own 'items' and headed down bot lane with the Sheriff.

* * *

"Hey Cait!" Leona said cheerily as she caught up to her ADC under the tower. Caitlyn forced a smile back.

"Hi, Leona."

The Solari warrior noted that Caitlyn didn't seem particularly happy or even focused as she usually was, the observation further reinforced when minions came and Caitlyn tried to shoot one of their own.

"Uh... Cait?" Leona hesitantly placed her hand on Caitlyn's shoulder.

"What?" The Piltovian snapped back, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. "Sorry... I'm just not quite feeling myself."

"I noticed..." Leona muttered to herself. Louder, she said, "Well, try to shoot _their_ minions, not ours, alright?"  
Caitlyn seemed to come back a bit to reality. "Oh! Oh... Oops... Hahaha..."

On the other side, Miss Fortune seemed to be having an argument with her support, Sona.

"..."

"No Sona, I can't."

"..."

"Sona, I am aware of tha-"

"..."

"PLEASE! JUST HEAR ME OUT!"

"...!"

Thankfully, both sides were equally distracted.

Leona sighed. This was going to be a long match. But then, something amazing happened.

"Hey, Leo?" Caitlyn started timidly, blasting a blue minion in the face. "Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot." Leona said, smiling at both the lame pun and Caitlyn opening up to her.

The Sheriff rolled her eyes, a small smile tugging on her lips. "When you have issues with Diana, how do you solve them?"

Leona was squealing like a 5 year-old little girl during Snowdown on the inside.

Could it really be this easy?!

"Usually I..." This would be the moment where Leona _**could**_ make something up like, "Tell her you love her in front of a large group of people!" or, "Re-arrange the clouds to form her name!" or even, "Paint her name on the wall in the blood of her enemies!" To get Caitlyn to do one of things, and to get Leona the proof she needed to win the bet.

Fortunately (Or unfortunately), Leona was a nice person and decided to tell the truth instead.

"I apologize to her in person. And I also bring her a present." The Radiant Dawn said.

"Hm." Caitlyn mused, launching a bullet at Sona. "Does it work?"  
"Usually."

The Piltovian nodded as if confirming something to herself. "Thanks Leona."

She was feeling slightly lucky today and decided to push it. Similing suggestively, Leona drawled, "Does this have to do with Vi?"

The reaction was immediate.

Caitlyn froze mid-snipe and turned her head towards her support. "W-What do you mean...?!"

' _Yes!'_ The Solari thought, smirking to herself. "Well c'mon, you two would make such a cute couple."

"..."

The rest of that game was spent in awkward silence.

Well, other than Katarina and Darius verbally abusing each other, much to the annoyance of Sejuani who started launching her own insults at the Noxians, resulting in a very pissed off red-head, an equally mad General, and a riled up Freljordite. The enemy jungler, Shaco, started cackling like mad when he ganked the Sinister Blade only to forget there was a turret there and give Katarina a free kill while the enemy mid-laner, Ezreal, decided to taunt her, resulting in the Noxian shoving her 'Void Staff' up his ass and earning her a double kill.

During the fight for Baron, Caitlyn managed to miss every single shot on the enemy team, instead hitting Leona but thankfully not damaging her. The Solari wasn't sure if it was on purpose or if Caitlyn was just too distracted.

Katarina tried to kamikaze onto the other team and unleash her Death Lotus but ended up being cut up like chop sui before she could even throw her first dagger by Irelia, whom Darius had fed to, leading to another verbal war between the Noxians.

Sejuani was the only one who managed to secure a kill, sending Sona back to Respawn Limbo before being torn to shreds by the enemy team, prompting Caitlyn and Leona to escape.

Leona sighed. This was not a good game.

* * *

The only good thing that had come out of that disastrous match was that Leona had seen Caitlyn, prompting her to recall something about a dinner with Jayce that was to happen this very night and her own thoughts about going to it.

Choosing an outfit to stake out the two Piltovian's was not going so well for Leona when the door to her room opened and Diana walked in, followed by Syndra.

"Hey Leo, watchu doing?" Diana asked, plopping herself onto the couch. Syndra chose to float instead.

"Hey Di, I was just-" Leona turned to see Syndra floating in her room. "... Syndra?" She asked disbelievingly. The Dark Sovereign smiled. "Hello, Leona."

"But I thought you- But... What are you doing here?!"

Diana stretched. "She's just helping me out with something, Leo; don't freak. It's not like she's gonna blow up our room."

Syndra shrugged. "I probably won't. Depends whether I'm bored or not. Nice lingerie, by the way."

It was at that moment that Leona realized that she was still in her underclothes and hastily grabbed the nearest shirt off the rack, cheeks flushing bright crimson while Diana laughed.

The Ionian waved her hand dismissively. "Relax. You're with Diana. Besides, I've seen better."

Leona reddened even more, if that were possible, unsure of how to take what Syndra had said.

Diana glanced over at the sovereign. "You have? I would've thought that you'd never even been in a relationship."

"..." Syndra's eyes started to glow. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Leona pulled on a pair of shorts to go with the orange shirt as she watched her girlfriend squirm under the glare of the mage.

"N-nothing! It's just that... Well... You've been locked up in a castle most of your life haven't you...?!"

The Radiant Dawn headed out of the room as fast as possible.

* * *

Syndra smirked as she watched Leona hurry out of the room. "How did I do?"

"Better than I thought you would, that's for sure." Diana said approvingly, walking over to the dresser to palm Leona's phone. "Nice move with the whole relationship thing."

The Dark Sovereign's smirk faded to a glare which Diana didn't see. "Distractions are my specialty."

 _'And I wasn't lying either...'_ She added on mentally.

"Yeah. That, and sneaking up on unsuspecting innocents..." Diana muttered to herself, opening Leona's phone.

Syndra floated over to her. "You probably have about 5 minutes before she realizes that she left her phone behind."

"Got it."

Diana opened up the photo app and scrolled through.

Ahri and Sona... Ashe and Tryndamere...

' _Hah! That's wrong!'_ The Scorn of the Moon thought gleefully, and then shuddered once she remembered how she'd come across that piece of information. She kept looking.

Jarvan and Shyvana... Caitlyn and Vi...

Caitlyn and Vi?!

The Lunari warrior played the video, pausing it right after Vi yelled at her partner about going on a date with the Defender of Tomorrow.

A smile grew on her face. "I know where Leona is headed now."

Syndra frowned. "Shouldn't we watch the rest of the video?"

Diana nodded and went to hit play, but just then, they heard the sound of the door opening.

Quick as a flash, Diana quit the tab and placed the phone back where they'd found it. Syndra grabbed Diana by the neck and levitated her into the air, giving her the appearance of holding the Scorn of the Moon up by the throat as she choked her.

Leona ran into the room just as Syndra hissed, "Well? Say that again why don't you?"

The Solari warrior quickly grabbed her phone and a dark hoodie lying on the bed and headed out, knowing that her girlfriend was strong enough to take care of herself. Not to mention that she didn't want to get caught in the conflict, either.

Once Leona left, The Dark Sovereign let Diana down, the two sharing a conspiratory grin at having successfully tricked the Radiant Dawn.

And also successfully forgetting that there had been more to the video.

* * *

It was finally around dinnertime. After crouching behind bookshelves and bushes all day (as the book had told her to do!), Leona had found nothing else.

 _'Well, it's about time to go see Caitlyn and Jayce. And there's only one place that Jayce could possibly be taking her to...'_

There was only 1 restaurant (discounting bars) for miles around, unless someone felt like filling out the tedious paperwork necessary to teleport directly to a different city. Which, seeing as this was just a dinner, Leona highly doubted that neither Jayce nor Caitlyn would want to.

The restaurant was owned by none other than...

...

...

...

 _Pantheon._

* * *

They say that Pantheon has always wanted to be a baker.

Well, that's correct, but he found a specialty in cooking, not baking, prompting him to open up a restaurant right next door to Morgana's new Sinful Succulence bakery. Needless to say, it was called 'FRIENDLY rivalry'. Emphasis on _FRIENDLY_. Because we totally know that it's going to turn out well...

Leona strolled through the doors and smiled at Pantheon, who was sitting in a booth, taking a break.

"Hey Panth!" She greeted, sliding across from him. The Rakkor warrior looked up.

"Leo! What're you doing here?"

Leona giggled. "Eating dinner, duh. I just don't feel like eating dinner at the Institute tonight."

Pantheon smiled. "Great! What would you like; the usual? And where's Diana?"

"... Diana is... Busy..." Leona said evasively, remembering that the last time she'd seen Diana, Syndra had been strangling her. "And the usual would be nice."

The Artisan of War looked at his friend suspiciously, sure that something was up with Diana.

 _'Wait... If they're having relationship issues...'_ He thought. _'Then maybe I should step away...'_

The last time that the avatars of the Sun and Moon had had relationship issues... Well, let's just say that Pantheon had very quickly run out of chocolate ice cream.

"Alright then. I'll get right onto the food!" Grinning broadly (a little too broad if you ask me), he stood up, replaced his helmet with a chef hat, and walked off to the kitchen.

Leona fingered her phone, which was in the pocket of her shorts as she waited for Caitlyn and Jayce to show up.

 _'But what if they don't decide to come here...?'_ She wondered to herself. _'No, they will. I just gotta be patient.'_

The door opened, and Leona glanced up hopefully, only to see Akali walk in with Shen and Kennen.

She looked back down as they took a seat in the booth behind her, and then looked up a moment later when someone sat down across from her.

"Fancy seeing you here, Leo." Diana smirked, picking up the salt shaker and shaking it like a maraca.

"Diana? What are you doing here?" Leona asked confusedly, noticing that Syndra was nowhere to be seen. "And put that down, you're getting salt everywhere!" She complained, brushing the white crystals off of her lap.

"Eating dinner, duh. I didn't want to eat at the Institute tonight." Diana replied, relinquishing the salt shaker only to hold the pepper hostage instead.

The Radiant Dawn noticed that that was almost the exact same excuse that she'd given to Pantheon, which meant... Which meant...

Diana was almost certainly here stalking a couple. Right?

Faking ignorance, Leona smiled. "Really? Same here!" She leaned across the table, mindful of the salt. "So, who are you here following?"

"As if I would tell you." Diana crossed her arms and shook the pepper a little. "I'll give you a hint."

Leona leaned closer, intent on hearing the hint.

"They are a champion of the League."  
"Di!" The Solari glared, leaning back into her seat.

"What? You asked for a hint. Hey! Waiter! Can I get some Ionian mint tea here?" Diana called towards one of the circulating waiters. A few moments later, he came over with a teapot and two cups.

"Thank you." She said, filling up the teacups. "Here, try this Leo. It's really good." A cup was pushed across the table to Leona, who picked it up and took a sip.

"Hm. Interesting flavor." She remarked.

Diana drank a bit of hers. "I quite enjoy the sharp taste. It's really similar to that cookie we had back on Mount Targon... You know, the ones with the red sun in the middle?"

"... You mean the offering cookies?!" Leona exclaimed. "Diana! You aren't supposed to eat those! They are offerings to the sun!"

"Oh please, Miss 'Chosen of the Sun'. I'm pretty sure you've snuck one or two as well." Diana pointed an accusatory finger at her girlfriend.

"... Well... I should be able to if the sun chose me... Hehehe..." Leona looked away sheepishly and saw Jayce opening the door to the restaurant. "Hey! Look! Ther-" She cut herself off, remembering that Diana didn't know about Caitlyn and Jayce (supposedly).

Diana tilted her head. "What? There's what?"

Leona panicked and tried to cover her mistake up. "There's a uh... Uh... New flowerpot! By the door! Never seen that here before!" She pointed towards a flowerpot holding white lilies by the door.

"... Leona... Those have always been there..." The Scorn of the Moon said slowly. "Are you feeling ok?"  
Leona grabbed her teacup and drained the contents, almost choking on the taste. "*cough* great! I feel great! Oh hey loo-"

"Leona, that painting as always been there as well." Diana joked, cutting Leona off.

"No, I was going to say that my food is here." The Solari said as a plate was set before her. She raised an eyebrow at Diana. "You never ordered, did you?"

Diana shook her head, smiling. "I must've forgotten to."

The waiter cleared his throat to get their attention. "Uh, miss. I have been asked to give this note to you." He said, extending a folded sticky note to Leona, who took it, frowning slightly.

"Who's it from?"

"Erm, Pantheon." The waiter replied before scuttling away to the Kinkou, who were frantically waving him down.

Leona shrugged and unfolded the note.

"What's it say? What's it say?" Diana pressed, trying to see. She gave up after a few moments and settled for stealing one of Leona's fries.

Leona folded the note again and stuffed it into her pocket. "Pantheon gives his apologies because he can't leave the kitchen to chat and also says that this meal's on him. So order up, Deedee."

Deedee- er, Diana, glared. "Do not call me that ever again."

"I _will_ keep calling you that if _you_ keep taking my fries!"

Diana paused with a fry halfway to her mouth and then slowly put it back down.

* * *

Finally, Leona excused herself to go to the washroom. Diana watched the Solari warrior enter the small branching hallway that led to the bathrooms before taking her phone out and searching for Caitlyn and Jayce.

There. In the middle. And they were-

PAYING THE BILL.

 _'SHIT!'_

Quickly, Diana texted Syndra the information.

Outside, the sovereign felt her phone vibrate and cursed. There were only 2 people in the world who had her phone number, and she was calling one of them right now.

"Hey, I'll call you back when I'm done here, ok? I gotta go for a bit... Yeah... Ok... Mhmm... Alright... JEEZ, I GET IT! WHO ARE YOU, MY MOTHER?!... K bye." Syndra hung up and sighed, opening up the text. Immediately, she shot to her feet and peeked out of the bushes across the street from Pantheon's restaurant.

The door opened and her targets stepped outside, walking down the street together.

Syndra cloaked herself and stuck to the shadows as she watched them like some sort of creepy stalker. Which, in a way, she kind of was right now.

Jayce tapped Caitlyn on the shoulder and led her down an alley. Grinning, Syndra got her camera ready and crossed the street, peering around the corner of the alley.

"So what did you want to show me, Jayce?" Caitlyn asked.

Jayce didn't say anything. Instead, he pushed the Sheriff against the wall and kissed her.

Syndra quickly snapped the photo and left as quickly as possible.

If she'd stayed, she would've seen Caitlyn shove Jayce away and slap him across the face. Hard.

* * *

Leona exited the bathroom to see that Jayce and Caitlyn were gone. Panicking, she ran over to her booth, and told Diana that she had to go.

To her surprise, Diana stood up too. "Same. I just got a new lead." Smirking, she waggled her phone in front of Leona's face and left.

* * *

Caitlyn was just stalking out of the alley when Leona ran outside. She sighed in relief that her target was still there.

Diana, on the other hand, was nowhere to be seen

Unbeknownst to her, Diana and Syndra were in the park across the street, conspiring and looking at the photo that Syndra had taken.

Leona then saw Jayce slump out of the same alley, rubbing his face and sporting a hurt expression on his face. The Radiant Dawn smiled.

 _'I'm guessing that he just tried to make a move on her. And failed. Ha! Which means...'_

She began to follow Caitlyn, staying a little ways behind and walking at a casual pace. A few minutes later, the Sheriff of Piltover stopped outside of a store and went inside.

Leona stopped and looked at the sign.

It was a... Chocolatier?

The Radiant Dawn assumed that Caitlyn would return to the Institute after her... Chocolate run, and so she kept walking towards the Institute.

After a little bit, she glanced over her shoulder to see the Piltovian holding a box, a nervous and somewhat anxious expression on her face.

Leona wasn't really sure what to make of it.

Finally, she arrived at the doors to the Institute, pushing them open and walking inside. She chewed her lip as she tried to recall what her _Spying 101_ book had said to do in this situation, going through the different sections and parts.

" **Section 2: Part A2: Finding a target** "

Important, but not needed right now.

" **Section 3: Part B3: Mustaches** "

No...

" **Section 3: Part B4: Disguising yourself as a tree** "

... Hell no...

" **Section 9: Part D5: How to blend in"**

Riiiight!

Mentally, Leona recalled the text and smiled. She waited for Caitlyn to walk ahead of her, noting the destination.

Next stop: the Piltovian wing.

* * *

It was fortunate that Caitlyn was too pre-occupied with her thoughts to notice Leona slip by her and enter the Piltovian wing of the Institute, where the champions from Piltover had their rooms. The Radiant Dawn assumed that the Sheriff would be heading to her own room, and decided to hide herself behind a rather large and peculiar looking potted plant in an alcove around the middle of the hallway.

When Caitlyn walked past the plant, Leona 'stealthily' moved to the statue of a giant gear and hid behind the base, keeping to the shadows and pulling the hood of her dark hoodie over her head. Thankfully, the alcove was large enough for her to squat. Caitlyn kept moving forward, stopped for a second, and then backtracked to the door directly in front of the gear statue. The Sheriff raised her hand to knock and then hesitated, muttering something to herself.

Leona pulled out her phone and sat it on the floor, scooting it out so that the camera was aimed at the door yet she herself was hidden and turned the video on.

Caitlyn took in a deep breath and then knocked twice on the door.

A few seconds passed in silence. Then another few seconds. And then-

The door opened, revealing Vi in a pink tank top with black shorts. The Enforcer frowned down at the shorter Caitlyn. "How was your date? Oh, sorry, I meant ' _dinner'_?" She asked mockingly.

"It really was just a dinner, Vi. And I told you, I feel nothing for him."

Caitlyn held up the box in her hands. "I bought you some chocolates, by the way."

Vi opened her mouth to say something, eyes narrowed, but Caitlyn stopped her before she could say anything.

"I'm sorry. I know I've been kind of an ass for the past few weeks, and honestly I wasn't sure how to make things up to you. Just saying sorry didn't seem good enough, so I finally asked Leona how she usually makes things up to Diana... It's just, the stress has really been getting to me, what with all the new gangs popping up in Piltover and... Other things. So, once again, I'm sorry. Forgive me..." The Sheriff trailed off awkwardly, handing the box over to Vi.

The Enforcer took the box and stared down at it. "Did he kiss you?"

"Yes. Then I slapped him."

A small smile tugged at the corners of Vi's lips. "You slapped him."

"Yes."

"YOU. _Slapped._ Him."

Caitlyn shifted, obviously uncomfortable. "Yes. I slapped him."

Vi broke down into laughter. "You slapped someone! Oh, that's glorious!"

The Sheriff didn't seem pleased by her partner's reaction, something Leona could tell even from behind the statue of a gear. The Solari warrior shifted around a bit, the squatting position getting slightly uncomfortable.

"Oh shut it, Vi. It was nothing. If I'd had my gun, I would've shot his arm for making a move on me."  
Vi stopped laughing and then looked seriously at Caitlyn. "Would you shoot _me_ if Imade a move on you?"

"Huh? What are y-!"

I think you can guess what just happened.

Leona whooped in joy on the inside.

That was one couple that she had on Diana!

 _'Haha! I'm in the lead! Probably!"_

Then she felt slightly bad for intruding on other people's privacy.

"Vi... What if someone saw?!" Caitlyn finally gasped, pulling away.

The Enforcer chuckled. "No one else is here, Cupcake."

Then, at the same time, they turned to look at the gear statue, Leona barely managing to pull the camera back in time.

Caitlyn looked at the statue for a little longer but didn't go over to it, to which Leona was eternally grateful. She sighed. "I guess. So, do you forgive me?"

"... I JUST KISSED YOU WHAT DO YOU THINK?"

"So that's a no?" The Sheriff teased, prompting Vi to glare at her and pull her into her room.

Leona didn't move for another 30 seconds just in case someone walked into the hallway. She finally stopped the video and got up, escaping from the Piltovian wing as fast as possible.

 _'This is going to be an interesting few days...'_ She speculated.

-Cheesy spy music playing in the background-

 _Dun dun dun... SECRET SPY LEONA DUN DUN DUNNNN_

* * *

 **(I decided to add more to the chapter. So here.)**

"Ok, so I was thinking..." Diana began. Syndra snorted.

"You? Thinking? Oh, you crack me up, Diana! Hahaha!"

An angry glare was directed towards the Dark Sovereign, causing her to laugh even harder.

Diana decided to keep going. "So. As I was saying." She directed another pointed glare at Syndra and adjusted her position on the park bench. _'Gods, it's cold out here...'_

"Sejuani and Tryndamere. Didn't Ashe say something about them yesterday?"

Syndra stopped laughing, a thoughtful look crossing her face. "Baby might be onto something. Why don't we listen to the recording again?"

"Humph. Good idea."

Diana pulled her phone out and found the audio file from the previous night.

 **"Sleep with anyone you wish?"** came Katarina's voice. **"But what of the vows you spoke when you married each oth-"**

 **"Katarina. Stop worrying about this. It** _ **doesn't matter.**_ **"**

Syndra took the phone and stopped the recording. "I think you started recording it too late. Past here is where they start... You know..."

Diana sighed. "Yeah. But I'm sure that Ashe said something about Sejuani and Tryndamere..."

"Well, we can't know for certain. Let's not push it for now." Syndra reasoned. "Because if you're wrong, it's going to be a complete waste of time."

The Scorn of the Moon was slightly surprised. "True..." She said out loud. Inside, however...

 _'SYNDRA is being the reasonable one for once?! Something is seriously wrong...'_

The Dark Sovereign's thoughts were actually more like, _'There is no way in hell that I'm getting into another closet scenario. Nuh uh. Not when Sejuani is involved. And Tryndamere has anger management issues.'_

"Can we go back yet? I'm freezing out here and Plaything wants me back by midnight." Syndra complained. Diana's eyes slid over to her partner-in-stalking.

"Plaything?"  
Syndra froze.

"NOTHING."

* * *

 **Authors Note(s):**

Credit where it's due. Plaything is not a nickname devised by me (although I could technically claim that I thought of it based on one of Syndra's quotes o-o). MemoryOfNothing, that credit goes to you (although I highly doubt you're reading this xD). If you want a spoiler, go check it out. If you already know it, BWAHAHAHAHA FUCK THE META! If you have no clue who Plaything is... Well it's up to you whether you want to know ahead of time :D

So I don't think I did as well on this chapter. Reason? I find Leona harder to write. I think the two-person banter between Syndra and Diana (or just Deedee's personality) is easier to write, personally. _**So I'm asking you now: should I write Diana & Syndra's adventures, Leona's, or both?!**_

Anyways, REVIEWS! OMG! LOVE YOU GUYS! (Honestly, I care about reviews more than follows and favs. Teehee xD I love reading them.)  
Thanks for the R&R, always appreciated, and I will catch y'all LAETAH!

~Creator


	4. Diana Gets a Haircut

**Chapter 4: Diana Gets a Haircut**

 _'How did I get myself into this mess...'_ Diana lamented. _'How... How... HOW!?"_

The bed above her head jerked violently again and the Scorn of the Moon flinched.

Next to her, Syndra had an identical look of fear, regret, and worry on her face. The two met eyes as they heard things that made them regret ever butting into other peoples private lives.

Diana closed her eyes and sighed as she complained to herself once again, mulling over the events which had led to her current predicament.

* * *

 **Earlier that day [Morning]...**

Diana had never been much of a morning person. Leona, however, was the complete opposite...

"DI! WAKE UUUUUUPPPP~!" Leona sang, throwing the curtains open and letting the sunlight invade the room.

A groan and muffled, "Fuck you." Was the only response that Leona received before Diana threw the blanket over her head, turned to the side facing away from the window, and buried her head under her pillow as well.

The Radiant Dawn sighed and decided to get changed first. Perhaps then, Diana would be ready to get out of bed...

A few minutes later, and the lunar warrior was still where Leona had left her.

It was no surprise that Diana didn't want to move. She was still sore from the previous night.

(Now, I know what you're thinking. No, she and Leona did not do anything that serious... This time. It actually had to do with-)

 _FWOOM!_

Diana shrieked with both surprise and anger as her girlfriend yanked the blanket off the bed while humming a song. Ah, morning routines were glorious, weren't they?

"Leoooo..." The Scorn of the Moon groaned, peeking her head out from under the pillow to glare at the redhead. "You suck."

But Leona wasn't paying attention. She was observing something on Diana's body. "Di... What happened here?"

"Hmm?" Diana glanced down. "Oh. Well, I tried to ask Syndra about-"

"Stop right there. _Syndra_ is enough of an explanation." Leona gingerly traced the large bruise on the warrior's midsection. "How did I not notice this last night?"

Diana smirked. "You were otherwise occupied, if I do recall correctly."

Leona blushed. "Ah... Ok fine, that's true... But still. Get up."

"NoOoooOoooooo..." White hair hid once again under the pillow.

"Fine. I'll go get some breakfast and then start finding more couples." The Radiant Dawn turned to head out of the room.

Diana paused.

 _'The challenge... Maybe I should get up...'_

The heretic was halfway to the closet by the time she finished that train of thought.

* * *

After Diana had finally dragged herself out of bed and gotten some breakfast (and a health potion from Soraka for her bruise), she'd found out that she had a match at noon that day.

Needless to say, she'd been pleased. It had been a while since she'd been summoned...

Deciding to kill some time, Diana had headed to the training rooms.

 _Khopesh_ (Her weapon. I'll refer to it as a crescent blade or a sickle or something else as well.) in one hand, she'd started practising against one of the training dummies in the corner.

The rhythm of training was soothing to Diana, and soon, she was completely entranced in her routines and movements.

 _'Slash. Blast. Hook. Pull. Slash. Spin. Blast. Slash. Blast. Slash. B-'_

"Training dummies are boring. They're dumber than Sion, and he's practically a zombie."

Startled, Diana whirled around and almost blasted Syndra in the face. "SYNDRA!"

"Hi." The sovereign smiled and waved. "Miss me?"

"Sure. Believe what you want... So what do you want?" Diana huffed, lowering her weapon.

A pout. "Does it always have to be something _I_ want?"

"It doesn't have to be, it just is. Now out with it."

Syndra sniffed. "Fine. But you don't have to be so rude. Anyways, I've got some info for you."

* * *

 **Present time...**

 _'Well_ _,_ _that's how_ _t_ _his all started_ _.._ _.'_ Diana recalled bitterly. The Dark Sovereign also seemed to be having second thoughts about this. The Ionian shifted closer to her and whispered to her ear (Her ear, not the shoulder this time!), _"I'm guessing that you never thought this far ahead again?"_

 _"YOU THINK? IF I HAD, WE WOULDN'T B_ _E_ _STUCK UNDER THE FUCKING BED RIGHT NOW!"_ Diana fired back.

Stuck under the bed. What an accomplishment.

* * *

 **Earlier [11am]...**

" **Hey** **Riven! Ca** **n** **I get a lit** **t** **le help he** **re** **?!** " Diana called out to her teammate telepathically. Stupid jungler was dead.

" **On it.** " The Noxian responded.

Avoiding another light bolt, Diana pulled Lux closer to herself and then blasted the light mage with a pulse of the moons energy, sending her opponent flying backwards to hit the packed dirt floor a couple feet away. The Demacian immediately tossed a ball of distorted light at Diana, who got a blast of light magic in the face when it detonated.

Diana leapt out of the way of another light projectile and fired a curved beam of moonlight at the enemy midlaner, catching the light mage in the side. Diana rushed forwards (not her ult, she's just running), her crescent blade flying through the air, but the Demacian intercepted it with her staff. Their gazes locked for a second, blue to silver, and then the Lunari warrior kicked Lux in the chest, using it as a sort of launching pad as she did a backwards flip while shooting another beam of energy.

Lux stumbled after the kick but then recovered enough to shield herself and shoot back one of her infamous snares at Diana, who didn't manage to dodge quite in time.

The Scorn of the Moon swore as a cage of light erupted around her and Lux smirked, twirling her baton.

A red laser shone directly on the center of Diana's chestplate, and she swore again, activating her shield.

"Fucking c-"

"DEMACIAAA!"

The warrior closed her eyes as the giant laser of light and DEMACIA-ness smashed into her with the weight of a thousand Gragas's, knocking her onto the ground a few feet away. She groaned in pain and shakily got to her feet, waiting for the Demacian to finish her.

" _The time for talk is over!"_

Diana had never been more happy to see a Noxian exile in her entire life.

Riven knocked Lux into the air with her re-formed blade, tearing through the Demacian's armour, and then finished off the already-weakened the Lady of Luminosity with a cone-shaped blast of green energy.

"AN ENEMY HAS BEEN SLAIN!"

Diana grinned at the Exile. "Thanks Riven."

Riven nodded back and then turned to the body of the Demacian, something like regret in her eyes.

" **Yo, stop standing there, ladies. We gotta get this drag.** " Graves' voice sounded in their heads.

" **Fine, but I'm recalling first.** " Diana responded, telling her summoner to start recalling her. Blue light enveloped the warrior and soon, she was standing back at the fountain.

* * *

"Well?" Syndra demanded once Diana was out of her game.

"Well, Riven looked at Lux strangely once, when she came to gank, but that's it. Seriously though, it's _Riven_. She looks at everyone weird. Are you sure that your source is correct...?" Diana questioned. Syndra waved her off.

"My source is very reliable. They both know and see things that you and I can't." She responded vaguely.

Diana decided not to push it. "Ok well, I'm betting that Riven's with Yasuo."

"How much you wanna bet?"

"... 50RP."

Syndra smirked. "It's a deal. And I say that Riven is gay."

Diana raised her drink to her lips. "The correct term is 'lesbian', because Riven is a girl."

"Whatever. Same meaning." The sovereign huffed, sipping on her wine.

The door to the Champions bar opened and, speak of the devil...

Teemo walked in.

(haha, you get it? Because the devil? Teemo? haha... ha... Ok fine that was lame.)

Diana glanced over and then back to Syndra. "What makes you think she's into girls?"

"Oh c'mon Diana. Is it not obvious? I mean, look at her!" Syndra pointed to a corner, where the Exile was sitting and nursing a bottle of Noxian Firewhiskey, occasionally glancing up and looking around the room. "Damn, even _I'd_ bang that."

 _'If I were single.'_ She mentally tacked on.

Diana raised an eyebrow at Syndra. "Are you drunk? Or just stereotyping based on appearance?"

"Oh come on. Surely you've heard the rumours that Katarina and Riven used to date before Riven was exiled by Noxus."

"It was self-imposed exile, and those are just rumours." The Scorn of the Moon took another gulp of her drink.

"Most rumours are based on fact." Syndra said, winking at Diana. "Like myths. And textbooks."

Diana smirked. "So what you're saying is that the rumour that you eat babies is based on fact?"

The Dark Sovereign's eyes started to glow. "I said BABY _CARROTS_! BABY. CARROTS! IT'S NOT MY FAULT THAT MERCHANT HEARD ME WRONG! WEAK, DEAF IDIOT WHO SHOU-"

"Whoa, what's this I hear about babies?" Leona asked, coming up to the duo sitting at the counter.

"Oh, hey, Leo." Diana signalled to Gragas for a refill as Leona sat down on the seat next to her. "What's with all the people coming in to drink at noon?"

"Same reason we're here." Syndra answered, calming down. "The mid-day special, and gossip."

"Yeah... That, and there's a fight going on in the dining hall." Leona said. "Draven said that Sona's singing sucks."

"Draven's fucked." Diana and Syndra said in unison. Nevermind that Draven had a point...

A commotion across the room caught the attention of the trio.

"What the... Oh my gods..." Leona's eyes widened.

For, across the hall...

"Morgana." Pantheon got down on one knee before the Fallen Angel and held out a cupcake. "I like you. A lot. I like you more than I like cooking and baking. Your souffles capture my soul, your whisk like my heartbeat as it beats the eggs in the mixing bowl whenever I'm near you. Er... I have prepared you a poem... Ahem." The Artisan of War quickly unfolded a piece of paper.

" _Strawberries are red,_

 _Blueberries are blue._

 _Will you be my baking partner,_

 _Forever and true?_

 _We go toget_ _h_ _er,_

 _Like eggs and flou_ _r_ _._

 _Botlane or mid, you_ _show true power._

 _When I'm wit_ _h_ _out you, my heart_ _r_ _ends._

 _My Fallen_ _Angel, you I'll defe_ _n_ _d,_

 _No matter the world, to whatever e_ _n_ _d._

 _So will you do me the honour... Of be_ _i_ _ng my girlfriend?"_

...

...

...

Everyone was silent.

And wondering how he would propose to someone, if this was just asking someone to be his girlfriend.

Diana and Leona both glanced over at each other, both noticing that the other had her phone out.

Morgana was silent. You could see the tears forming in her eyes, feel her joy as she realized that she didn't have to be alone in this forsaken world anymore. Feel her happiness as someone finally accepted her.

"I... Do you need sugar to bake a cake?" She whispered.

Pantheon was slightly taken aback. "Ah-what?"

"YES!" Morgana cried and wrapped her arms around Pantheon. "YES! YES YOU DO!"

Someone started clapping, and soon, all the champions joined in. The Fallen Angel took the cupcake from Pantheon and bit it, smile as bright and warm as Leona's usually was.

Gangplank wolf-whistled.

And then, as if Pantheon's declaration had paved the way for the men in the bar, Garen dropped to his knees before Katarina.

Diana held back a laugh. This was not going to end well.

"Katarina. Your blades have pierced my heart. Your sharp wits and remarks as-"

"No."

Garen froze. "W-what?"

The Sinister Blade's eyes were like emerald chips of ice. "I said no, I will not date you. Just because I've lost a few matches recently doesn't mean I've lost any brain cells."

A hurt expression crossed the Might of Demacia's face. "B-but... Blitzcrank said..." And then his expression hardened. "You have to see for yourself."

The Demacian picked up the Noxian like a sack of potatoes and made to leave the room, supposedly to bring her to Blitzcrank.

Katarina was shocked, to say the least. "Hey! What the fuck are you- PUT ME DOWN THIS INSTANT YOU FUCKING R-!"

"NO! YOU MUST SEE THE PROOF OF OUR LOVE!" Garen yelled back, cutting off the Sinister Blade.

"WHAT?! I HAVE A G-BOYFRIEND ALREADY!" Katarina screamed, finally remembering that she could just shunpo away. She did just that, landing next to her sister and Talon with her knives drawn.

Garen spun around, eyes wide. "You... WHAT? WHO IS IT?! WHO HAS STOLEN YOUR HEART FROM ME, MY LOVE?!"

Everyone else in the bar was just face-palming at the fact that Garen believed he and Katarina were meant to be just because Blitzcrank had told him so.

Blitzcrank's Fleshling Compatibility service had a 98% failure rate... (And also did not account for the fact that 85% of the females in the League were either bisexual or gay- pardon me, lesbian. Hence the 98% failure rate.)

"Listen here, you Demacia-obsessed little-" Katarina hissed, preparing to throw a knife at the Demacian before being interrupted by her sister.

"She's dating Talon." Cassiopeia interjected, glaring pointedly at both Katarina and Talon.

 _'I swear to th_ _e_ _Gods if those two idiot assassins don't play along...'_

"Zzz... Huh... What? Did someone say my name?" Talon mumbled, waking up from his nap.

Katarina said nothing.

Garen gasped. "YOU'RE DATING YOUR OWN BROTHER?!"

Lux ran up to her brother and whispered something into his ear while making frantic hand gestures. His facial expression changed from one of disgust to one of shock.

"Oh... So you're not actually related..." He mumbled, more to himself than to the Du Couteau's. "... TALON! I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DU-"

"OUT! NO FIGHTING IN MY BAR!" Gragas yelled at Garen. "TAKE IT OUTSIDE!"

The Might of Demacia glowered at the Rabble Rouser and then turned to leave. At the door, he turned back around, made eye contact with Talon, and then pointed out the door.

Finally, he left.

Lux sighed. "Sorry about my brother." She apologized to everyone in the room.

Mutters of, "It's fine. We all know he's an idiot." and "I see _you_ got the good genes in your family." and "If only he had as much brains as brawn..." rose up from the assembled champions.

Meanwhile, Talon was arguing with Cassiopeia.

"What did you do that for?!" He hissed once they'd caught him up to speed. "Now everyone thinks that I'm with Kat!"

"Yeah! Jeez Cass what was that for?!" Katarina seconded her foster brother.

Cassiopeia sniffed. "You'll thank me later. Besides, Talon is a guy. I think. And _you_ are not ready to come out of the closet yet."

The Sinister Blade glared at her sister, unwilling to say that she was right.

"And I promise, I'll make it up to you tonight, Tal." Cassiopeia winked at the Blade's Shadow, who lowered his head so that the Du Couteau sisters couldn't see his blush.

At the counter, Syndra was discussing what they'd just witnessed with Diana and Leona.

"But seriously, I thought that Morgana was going to get together with Kayle..." The Dark Sovereign mused. Leona made a face.

"Kayle's her sister!"

"So? We've all heard the rumours that Morgana likes her sissy-poo~" Syndra smirked. "Rumours are all based on fact, after all."

Diana coughed. "Baby carrots."

The mage reddened, whether from anger or what, no one was sure. "That-that..."

Diana and Leona laughed, causing the Dark Sovereign to glare at them. Just as she opened her mouth to speak, however, Ezreal spoke up.

"Ahem... Well, as you all know, we just had Pantheon ask Morgana to be his girlfriend, to which she said yes. Garen tried right afterwards, only to find out that Katarina was already taken. And now, I think it's my turn." The Prodigal Explorer smiled and walked over to his target.

"What is this, one of Nidalee's mating season rituals?!" Diana hissed to Leona. "The one where the guys all confess to the girls that they like?"

The Solari warrior shrugged. "Possibly, although I'm pretty sure that mating season starts next week."

Diana decided not to ask Leona how she knew that.

Ezreal knelt before Lux. "Lux, you brighten up the room whenever you walk into it. Your smile is equal to a thousand Targonian diamonds. You-"  
Lux was blushing like mad as she interrupted her suitor. "I'm sorry Ezreal. I'm taken."

"*gasp!* Scandalous!" Syndra drawled.

"Shh! It's getting to the good part!" Diana hissed. Syndra raised an eyebrow.

"Where did you get that popcorn?"

"SHHH!"

Ezreal's face fell. "... Oh..." Then he stood up. "Just so you know Lux, if things don't work out, I'm here for you!" And then he walked out.

...

...

...

"Poor boy..." Karma murmured. Others agreed.

Leona and Diana looked at each other.

"I call Lux!" Diana said first. Leona glared.

"Seriously, where did you get that popcorn?!" Syndra asked again.

"You can't just 'call' someone. There's nothing you can do to stop me from going after her too." Leona argued.

"THE POPCORN! HOW?!"

The Lunari warrior rolled her eyes. "You're right. But why don't you try someone else, so that we don't both only get one point? I'll even help you find someone else."

 _'Hopefully someone who has no possible chance of having a lover.'_

Leona had that, " _Are you high... OR JUST_ _REALLY FUCKING STUPID?_ " look in her eyes.

"DIANA! THE POPCORN?! HOW?!"

Diana turned to Syndra. "What popcorn?"

"..."

Resigning herself to never finding out about Diana's mysterious popcorn, the sovereign decided to get her fun.

Three dark orbs slowly floated over to Leona, who was still protesting against giving Lux up.

"How about you find your own quarry?" She smirked.

Leona gulped. _'I will not be afrai- GAHH!'_

The Solari warrior's eyes widened as Syndra slowly choked her with her magic.

"Do you agree?" Syndra slowly tightened her hold on the magic. Leona's face slowly started turning darker.

"SYNDRA! STOP!" Diana cried.

The Dark Sovereign smirked. "But I'm just starting to have some fun~"

"Please stop! SYNDRA!" The Scorn of the Moon pleaded desperately as she watched her girlfriend slowly suffocate.

Syndra sighed. "Fiiiine." She sounded very much like a spoiled little kid.

Leona started gasping for air and fell out of her seat, landing on her front. Pantheon glanced over worriedly, but Diana stopped him from coming over with a shake of her head.

She crouched next to the Radiant Dawn. "Leo... Leo... LEO!"

"..."

"Get up!"

"..."

"... LEO?!"

Leona remained silent, and her body started shaking.

Diana backed up. "Syndra what are you doing?!"

"ME?" The Dark Sovereign was offended. "I'm not doing anything! How dare you accuse me!"

Leona rolled over, laughing like mad. "Oh... Di..." She managed to get out.

Diana glared. "Not funny!" She pouted as Leona only laughed harder.

Karma, meanwhile, was smiling to herself. "Ah, young love..." She muttered.

Akali looked over. "Karma, you're starting to sound like an elder."

"I _am_ an Elder."

"No... Well, yes, but I meant like... You sound like you're _old._ That kind of elder." Akali explained.

"Ah." Karma chuckled. "I suppose you are correct."

"How old are you again?"

"Don't you know it's rude to ask a woman her age?" The Enlightened One teased.

Meanwhile, Leona had finally calmed down.

"Ok, fine. I'll look somewhere else." Leona grudgingly agreed. "If only so I live to have Diana do my Kog'Maw duty."

"Puh-lease. I need you to live so that _you_ can do _my_ Kog'Maw duty." Diana smirked.

"I got 2 more couples today." Leona said.

"So did I!" Diana lied, not mentioning that she knew about Katarina and Ashe, meaning that Katarina and Talon were (most like) not actually a thing. "And I'm going to get another. As for you..."

Diana glanced around the room. She smiled to herself.

 _'Perfect target who couldn't possibly be dating!'_

"Well, Irelia seems to be having a staring contest with Riven." She noted.

 _'Shit.'_ Diana thought, realizing her mistake too late. _'What if she goes after Riven?'_

Syndra's head whipped to where Diana was looking. "WHAT WHERE?! GETYOUREYES OFFOFMYPLAYTHING! SHE'S **MINE**!"

Then she noticed the avatars of the sun and moon looking at her funny.

"Ahem. Nothing. I mean... I knew Riven was gay." Syndra awkwardly gulped her wine down and averted her eyes.

"... Ok then..." Diana said slowly, not bothering to correct Syndra in her usage of the word 'gay'. It was killing her inner Grammar Lunari. (Because they don't have Grammar Nazi's... I don't think)

Leona nodded to herself. "Yeah... Ok... Thanks Di."

Meanwhile, Katarina was entering the washroom when she was intercepted inside by a certain Frost Archer.

"You're doing better." Ashe smiled. Katarina rolled her eyes.

"Trust me, I nearly stabbed _myself_."

"Oh c'mon, you didn't try to murder Garen. That's an improvement." Ashe argued. And then she noticed the look in the Sinister Blade's eyes. "No going after him tonight."

"..."

"Give me your knives."

"..." Katarina glared at the archer.

"Kat. Your knives."

"..." Emerald eyes narrowed.

"NOW." The Queen ordered, narrowing her own eyes and glaring fiercely back at the Noxian.

" **...** "

* * *

 **Hours later...**

"So, Lux or Riven?" Syndra demanded. The two were standing in front of the Independent Factions wing, which was right across from the Demacian wing.

Diana thought for a moment. "Riven. Because there's a chance that Leona would've chosen to go after Riven instead of Irelia, so I need to make sure that if she does choose Riven... I get the point too."

"Fair enough." Syndra said. "Let's go."

"Wait... Why are you coming too?" Diana looked suspiciously at Syndra again, much like the time that the sovereign had helped her with Ashe. "I get why you wanted to help once, maybe even twice, but... Three times? What's in it for you?"

"I'm bored?" Syndra shrugged, refusing to reveal her real reasons.

And it was a very good one.

Diana raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything more. 'Fr _ee help is free help, af_ _t_ _er all. Especially if It's_ _f_ _rom an all-powerful mage.' Sh_ e thought.

"Alright then Syndra, let's go." She said, turning to go down the Independent Faction _s_ wing before realizing something.

Where was the all-powerful mage?

"... Syndra?" She turned around. And then narrowed her eyes. "... Really..." Diana muttered to herself.

Syndra, the Dark Sovereign, the all-powerful Ionian mage who had slaughtered hundreds, the mage who'd nearly killed Diana at least 3 times, and who sought vengeance upon her homeland was...

Being distracted. By cookies.

* * *

 **Present time...**

"Syn _dra, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Dia_ na hissed.

Syndra glanced over at the Scorn of the Moon. "Mmp _f?"_

 _"W_ H _Y ARE_ _YO_ _U EATING COOKIES RIGHT NOW?!"_

The mage swallowed. " _I'm_ _hungry!"_

 _"..."_

 _S_ uddenly, the sounds above them ceased. Syndra stopped chewing.

'We're g _o_ _ing to die.' Diana r_ ealized. ' _We're_ g _oing_ _to die, because my super-powerful mage backup decided to take a_ _cookie break in the middle of a mission.'_

* * *

 **Earlier [5pm]...**

"Really. Her password was '1234?'" Syndra asked disbelievingly. Diana shrugged.

"Yep. Guesswork is more overpowered than a fed Nasus sometimes." She smirked.

"How did you even know which door was hers?"

The Scorn of the Moon snorted. "Please. I live in this wing. And she's my neighbour."

The sovereign bit into a double chocolate fudge cookie. "Don chew wiv in de Mouwnt Targon wing?" She asked through a mouthful of cookie.

Diana glared. "I cannot understand a word you just said. Did your mother never tell you that it was rude to speak with your mouth full?"

(^^ Chapter 1 flashbacks)

Syndra chewed and then swallowed. "What mother? I'm an orphan. The only person who I ever trusted in my childhood betrayed me. He lied to me. He locked up my powers. MY POWERS!" Her eyes started glowing, and the air around the mage crackled with energy.

Diana took a step back. "... Syndra?"

"I'LL SHOW THEM WHO NEEDS TO BE LOCKED UP!"

"... Syndra?"

"THEY WILL PAY! IN BLOOD THEY SHALL PA-aaaah..." The Dark Sovereign trailed off and her eyes dimmed as Diana stuffed the rest of the cookie into her mouth.

' _Whew_. Cri _sis averted.'_ The Lunari warrior thought with a small amount of satisfaction.

Syndra ch _e_ wed for a bit and then swallowed the rest of the cookie. "Ok... I'm good now. Anyways, don't you live in the Mount Targon wing?"

Diana shrugged. "The Institute offered for me to take my room there when I first joined. I declined, for obvious reasons. And now it's too late to change it."

"Oh."

"Anyways, are we going in?" Diana pointed to the open door to Riven's room. "Riven will be out of her match soon."

In answer, the sovereign floated into the room.

Non-descript. It was non-descript. That was the best way to describe it. Or, because it was so un-remarkable compared to every other champions room (I have it on good word that Taric's room is actually just a giant crystal. It's truly, truly, truly outrageous), it was actually the one that stood out the most.

It had simple wooden furniture. In the middle of the room sat a table with two chairs. To the side was a kitchenette and directly across from the entrance was one other door, probably leading to the bedroom.

Syndra raised an eyebrow. "Damn, she either has no taste... Or this room has never been used."

"She was a soldier in Noxus for most of her life, what do you expect?" Diana answered back, but Syndra wasn't listening.

"... She'd need a painting right there. And one of those cushy beanbag chairs! And maybe a glass floor showing an underground aquarium. Ooo! And one of those giant heat lamp thingies in the corner over there... Maybe a fish tank..." Syndra the Home Decor Specialist mused.

Diana decided not to say anything. Instead, she walked over to the door and opened it.

Inside, the room was slightly more elaborate. A queen-sized bed with stuffed down sheets and pillows, an adjoining bathroom and closet, and... and...

"Hey Syndra, check this out." The Scorn of the Moon called into the main room.

Syndra floated over, closing the door behind them.

"Whoa... Why does she have that?" The sovereign mused.

On the wall hung a painting of a poro stuffing its face with poro snax, little hearts surrounding it.

"... Does Riven have a weird poro fetish?" Diana speculated. "Look, there's another one on the bed..."

Indeed, sitting atop one of the pillows was a little stuffed poro.

"I'd believe that she had a thing for poro's if these things were in her fridge, not her bedroom." Syndra answered. "Hey, look. There's our escape route."

She was pointing to a large window right beside the bed, on the left. Currently, it was closed.

"Yeah." Diana agreed. "But it's closed."

Syndra rolled her eyes. "Are you forgetting who I am?"

"Nope. A sadistic Ionian mage with a thing for choking people to death, who is always bored and looking for ways to entertain herself in between killing sprees." Diana answered.

The Dark Sovereign's eyes narrowed.

Just then, they heard the door in the other room opening.

One shared glance, and then they were panicking.

"The closet!" Diana decided, running for it.

Turned out, it wasn't a walk-in.

"Shit, we can't possibly fit in there..." Syndra muttered.

The sound of voices got louder.

The bathroom door was too far.

There was nowhere to hide.

 _'Except._..' Diana realized.

 _"Syndra!_ Th _e_ _bed!" The Scorn o_ f the Moon hissed. Syndra stared at her in shock.

 _"Really?! Do you really think that hav_ _i_ _ng sex with me right now will accomplish anything?! Besides cheat on our girlfr_ _i_ _ends?!"_ The sovereign hissed back. Diana didn't notice the plural in Syndra's speech.

 _"No, you idi_ o _t! UNDER the bed!"_

 _"Oh. Right._ "

Luckily, it was just high enough for them to wriggle under.

Syndra's foot had just disappeared under the darkness of the bed when the door opened.

"Really, Riven? Open the window! Let some fresh air in!" A chirpy female voice said.

Syndra and Diana shared a look. It wasn't completely dark under the bed, and they could both see each other. However, it was quite dusty...

The look said something along the lines of, "So, what's for dinner?"

(oops, wait... Give me a second... Got it.)

The look said something along the lines of, "Who is that?"

The voice seemed familiar. (Well, no duh.)

Footsteps moved to the left side of the bed, and Syndra quickly cloaked them, knowing that it might still fail as it wasn't really dark.

Thankfully, the person didn't check under the bed. She opened the window and then walked back out, leaving the door open.

"Alright then, Mom." Riven's voice was heard, sounding lighter and happier than either of the two hiding under the bed had ever heard. "What's for dinner?"

"Wait, you haven't eaten yet?" The chirpy voice answered.

"Nope. Haven't had the time." Riven answered back.

"Alright then, Chef Lux will whip up some of your favorite spaghetti and meatballs!"

There was laughter in the other room. Syndra and Diana shared yet another look.

" _LUX_?" They whispered to each other.

 _'This actually works out. Both my targets are here...'_ The Scorn of the Moon realized.

* * *

Lux and Riven were apparently just eating dinner and chatting, like friends would. Diana was starting to wonder if this was just a waste of time and if they should take the opportunity to just slip out the now-open window, when suddenly, she heard it.

Lux giggling.

Ok, nevermind, that was nothing new.

Just in case though, Diana palmed her phone and checked it. She swore.

Syndra glanced over, and Diana held out the phone for her to see.

It was out of battery.

Sighing, the sovereign offered her own to the Lunari warrior, who accepted it gratefully as she quickly opened up the camera on it (thankfully, no pass code was needed to use it.)

Diana reminded herself to spam selfies on Syndra's phone when she got the chance. Then decided that it was probably a horrible, horrible idea.

Then they heard Riven's voice in the other room.

"Your room or mine?"

"Hm." Lux mused playfully. "I don't know... My bed's better, but yours is closer..."

 _"RECORDING! NOW!"_ Syndra hissed.

 _"I KNOW THAT!"_ Diana hissed back, turning on the video recording and directing the camera to the small slit under the front of the bed.

It managed to capture Lux and Riven falling onto the floor just outside the door, making out like teenagers at a high school party.

Diana stopped it immediately, and then realized that they were trapped as Riven stood up and literally _threw_ Lux onto the bed.

* * *

 **Present Time...**

The silence was unnerving. Diana was planning her own obituary when Lux started speaking again.

"Ok. Sorry. I thought I heard something..."

"It's fine, Lux. Do you want to go check?"

"No, it's fine. I'll just cast a silencing spell on the room..."

A minute later, and the noises started up again.

 _'It's too bad the silencing doesn't silence the noises IN the room...'_ Diana mentally complained.

She glanced ove _r_ at Syndra, who was poking at something near the head of the bed with her foot. The Dark Sovereign looked up at Diana and then levitated the mass over.

It was Riven's Battle Bunny outfit, complete with a carrot sword which they'd never seen her use in battle.

Like literally. It was just a giant carrot.

The look that the hidden duo shared said something like, "..."

Syndra picked up a cookie and was about to bite it when Diana forcefully grabbed it out of the mage's hand, shooting her a glare.

" _Now is not the time!_ " She hissed _._

 _"But I'm hungry!"_ Syndra whined.

 _"Save it for later!"_

The bed dipped down a bit, forcing Diana and Syndra to lie flat on their stomachs with the bed pressing uncomfortably against the backs of their skulls. It rose up again a few seconds later, and Diana hissed.

" _My hair! It's caught!"_

Syndra cursed quietly. Diana's hair had been caught in the underside of the bed, where there was a small bit of metal meshing.

 _'WHO HAS METAL UNDER THEIR BED?!'_ They thought in unison.

 _"Shit, Diana. If I try to cut it with my magic, I might cut your head off..."_ Syndra whispered.

It could also possibly electrocute the lunar warrior. But there was only a 70% chance of that, and so the mage decided not to mention it.

 _"Fuck..."_ Diana said, trying to tug her hair out of the meshing. _"Is there anything we can use?!"_

 _"Well, we could always ask Lux and Riven for help."_ Suggested Syndra.

 _"That better be a joke."_

 _"..."_

Diana looked around frantically. " _Wait! Use that!"_

Syndra looked to where Diana was pointing. _"The carrot sword?! Can I even lift that?"_

 _"Use your magic!"_

"Wait. Riven. Stop." Lux's voice floated down to them. "I hear something..."

"Are you sure?" Responded the Exile.

The Scorn of the Moon frantically motioned for the mage to cut her loose, putting her head as close to the ground as possible and closing her eyes.

Syndra prepared herself and then levitated the massive carrot sword, swinging it through her partners silver hair like she was cutting a ribbon.

Diana opened her eyes as she felt the pressure on her head disappear, only to gape in horror at the hair she'd just lost.

The Dark Sovereign used her magic to wrestle it out of the metal, leaving no trace of their presence there. The whole room was silent.

Syndra cloaked herself and Diana, while the latter stopped the moonlight from coming into the room again. They started edging towards the side of the bed that was closer to the window.

Lux got off the bed and slowly walked towards the bedroom door, Riven following. Both had their backs turned towards the bed.

" _GO!"_ Syndra hissed at Diana.

They rolled out from under the bed and vaulted out of the window.

In slow motion, it was something like this:

Syndra told them to go.

Diana started rolling out.

Syndra blasted open the window.

Syndra rolled after Diana.

Riven tapped on Lux's shoulder.

Diana rolled onto her feet.

Diana used the momentum to propel herself out the window.

Riven started turning around.

Syndra rolled onto her feet.

Ssyndra pushed herself out with her magic.

Riven saw a dark blur shoot out the window.

The window closed.

* * *

"Someone was in here!" Riven gasped, running towards the closed window and opening it. "Someone saw and heard us!"

There was no movement on the dark grounds below.

Lux groaned. "What are we going to do?"

"We need to find out who it was."

The Demacian got a far-away look in her eyes. "I can do that..."

* * *

Bushes are an uncomfortable place to hide in. Just ask Syndra.

"Ugh. Can we go yet?" The mage complained.

"Not yet. Not until we're sure that it's clear." Diana responded, peeking through the leaves.

The sound of crunching caused the Lunari warrior to glance over at her companion.

"... Syndra... Really..."

The Dark Sovereign swallowed. "What? I'm hungry, and we're safe now. Therefore, Syndra is allowed to eat cookie." She said happily.

 _'Speaking in third person. Really.'_ Diana thought, peering through the leaves again.

"So, Diana. When are you going to give me my money?"

The warrior turned to stare at Syndra. "Money?"

"You bet 50RP that Riven was with Yasuo. I said she was gay. She is with Lux. That means I win."

"..."

Diana's inner Grammar Lunari started sounding the alarm.

* * *

"I have called us here tonight because there has been a disturbance in the balance of things." Said one voice.

The rest of the room was silent.

The voice continued. "Some of our fellow members of the League are snooping around places in which they don't belong."

Someone gasped. "Code Blue?"

"No. I'm afraid that this is Code Rainbow." Replied the first voice.

Dark brown eyes stared out from under a hood. "Code Rainbow? It can't be..."

A hand thudded onto the table. "The balance which we've worked to maintain for so long will be destroyed if anyone finds out such things."

A nod from someone across the table. "We must stop them from finding out any more of the League's couples. Some are meant to be hidden for a reason."

"Agent Shadow." Someone said.

"Yes?"

"Do you have any idea of who the perpetrators might be?"

A shake of the head. "No."

"Oh come on! You're supposed to be the spy of this organization!" Hissed one of the other hooded figures.

"That is also your job, Agent Whispers." Replied Agent Shadow. "And have _you_ a clue?"

"... No..."

"Enough." Said the first voice. "We need to figure both who they are, and why they are doing this. Not even _we_ know all the couples at the Institute, and it is for the best. We most stop them at all costs."

"No need to be so dramatic, L- Agent Double Rainbow~" Purred the figure next to the speaker. "I'm sure they will give up soon..."

"Agent Nine, she has a point. We need to stop this." Said a deep voice. "First thing's first. Since agents Shadow and Whispers don't know anything, have any of the rest of us seen or heard anything suspicious?"

"I saw a dark blur rocket out my window. That is all, Agent Amethyst." Said Agent Double Rainbow. "Perhaps it is Nocturne?"

"Maybe. But what is his motive?" Jumped in another voice, the owner putting a reassuring hand onto their weapon.

The sound of footsteps outside the room alerted those inside to someone's presence.

"Agent Siren! Agent Hawk! You're the decoys today!" Agent Shadow said, already striding for the window and melting into the shadows.

"Remember, guys." Agent Double Rainbow said. "We are the Seven."

"And we keep the balance." Said seven voices.

When the door opened, there were only two figures sitting at the table in the middle of the room, playing cards.

Sona blinked and then walked back out.

* * *

 **Authors Note(s):  
(Timestamp added 8/21/15)**

Who are the Seven? I wonder...

Will be writing both POVS. And thanks Spiritslayer for your idea of the bed!

That was almost 7000 words. Holy shit. My new record QQ

I'm so glad that people like Syndra! She's honestly so much fun to write for me, but I'm always nervous about getting her personality wrong. Same goes for every character. And uploading a chapter... (seriously, updating is so scary. I feel like I'm going to mess something up, or that people won't like it, which will send me down because I'll start downgrading myself and- i'll stop right there.)  
Sorry Erindor! I know that I said I would be doing jungle Syndra, but then it just kind of didn't quite fit in the way I wanted it to so it'll probably be next chapter.

For all of those who have reviewed, thank you so much! For all of those who have followed and faved, thank you so much!  
I had so much trouble writing this chapter. Mostly due to internet and the font glitching out every once in a while, so if a letter is randomly bolded, sorry, and I tried my best to fix it -_-  
I HAZ A POLL ON MY PROFILE. NO ONE HAS TO FILL IT OUT, BUT I'D LOVE IT IF YOU DID :D  
I feel like I'm missing a lot in the chapter, so if something doesn't seem quite right, just tell me and I'll go change/add it.  
I might just screw the scheduled updates xD sorry...  
Anyways, R&R!  
(That reminds me. I might make a r- nvm)  
~Creator


	5. Stalkers of The Dark- Part 1: The Bet

**Chapter 5: Stalkers of The Dark- Part 1**

Diana slowly opened the door to Leona's room and tiptoed inside.

Leona carefully slid open her window and climbed in.

The two froze once they saw each other.

"What are you doing here?" They asked at the same time.

"And why were you coming in through the window?" Diana added.

"I live here." Answered Leona. "And why do you care?"

"I'm hungry." Stated Diana. "And I care because... Actually, I don't. I just find it odd. This is _your_ room, after all."

The Scorn of the Moon walked over to her girlfriend's fridge to find some food. Leona always kept her fridge well-stocked.

The Solari warrior was still standing by the open window. "Di, what happened to your hair?"

Diana turned her head around, a cream puff in her hand. "What happened to your face?"

"I asked first." The Radiant Dawn huffed, brushing a stray leaf off of her sleeve.

"And I don't give a shit." The Lunari warrior replied, stuffing the whole cream puff into her mouth. "Well?" She asked with her mouth full.

Leona resigned herself. "Well...

* * *

 **Earlier that night...**

Syndra floated over to her girlfriend's door and tapped in the pass code. It flashed green and the sovereign pushed the door open.

"You're back!" Irelia exclaimed, closing her book and setting it aside, a large grin on her face. "Come on, Sy-"

Syndra made a motion for Irelia to be silent. The Captain of the Ionian Guard was confused but obliged to the request, shutting her mouth and gazing quizzically at the mage, who was floating around the living room, checking under every chair, table, tapestry, and piece of paper as if there was some tiny assassin hiding there.

The Dark Sovereign levitated a jade statuette of a dragon up and then set it back down before whirling to the bedroom door and going inside.

Seconds later, she emerged back into the living room and beckoned for Irelia to follow her.

"What's going on, S-"

"Shh..." The mage cut off the Will of the Blades, who then shot her an exasperated look. "Trust me." Syndra added.

 _'This better not be role-playing again. I hated being Bella last time.'_ Irelia thought to herself. _'Not to mention that Syndra is a creepy Edward.'_

They entered the simple bedroom, and then Syndra promptly used her magic to rip the closet door off its hinges. A certain Solari warrior flew out (quite literally).

"Wha-AHMFFF!" Leona, wearing the same outfit as when she'd stalked Caitlyn, struggled futilely against the grip of the Dark Sovereign's magic. Syndra kept her suspended in the air and unable to speak, eyes glowing a violent shade of violet.

"Do not mention a word of this to Diana." She hissed ominously, voice echoing with that strange double timbre as it did on the Fields. "Or do. Because I'll enjoy ripping out your intestines through your throat and then feeding them back to you as I slowly crush your skull and watching your brain splatter across the walls."

Leona couldn't reply, naturally, but she really did not like the sound of the second option.

Irelia was horrified and confused. "Wait- Leona... What are you doing here? And Syndra, why..."

Syndra turned to the Ionian captain, eyes dimming and voice returning to normal. "Don't worry about it. I'll explain to you later. BUT AS FOR YOU!" Her glowing eyes returned full force, along with the echoing voice, as she once again turned to Leona. "DO NOT TELL DIANA. I DON'T CARE IF YOU NEED TO TO WIN THE BET. I. DO. NOT. GIVE. A. SHIT. BUT YOU WILL **NOT** TELL YOUR GIRLFRIEND. UNDERSTOOD?"

The Solari warrio _r c_ ould only nod as she was hurled out of the open window and into a thornbush below.

For good measure, Syndra even tossed out a few of her dark spheres after her.

Once that was taken care of, the Dark Sovereign turned back to her girlfriend.

"So, Plaything! How was your day?" She chirped, squeezing the surprised Ionian into a tight hug.

* * *

 **Present Time...**

"I fell down some stairs." Leona lied, tracing one of the scorch marks from Syndra'a magical balls on her arm. It had burnt right through both the hoodie and shirt to her flesh.

Diana raised an eyebrow, stealing a yogurt cup from the fridge as well. "So, let me get this straight." She pointed an accusatory spoon at Leona. "You got... Multiple cuts, bruises, scratches, and even _burns_... From FALLING DOWN SOME STAIRS." She summed up disbelievingly.

"... There were a lot of stairs?"

"Were the stairs on _fire_?"

Leona sighed. "Ok, fine. You got me. I fell off a building."

Diana narrowed her eyes. "Was the building on fire?"

"... Yes..."

"... Was it also _one story?_ "

Well, it wasn't a complete lie. After all, Leona _had_ been hurled out of a one story window.

"... Yes..."

"..."

The Scorn of the Moon wasn't stupid. She knew that Leona was lying.

But _why_ her girlfriend would lie was beyond her. After all, the competition itself wasn't something that they were hiding from each other.

Leona knew that Diana knew that she was lying. But she wasn't going to tell her why... Yet.

 _'Syndra might have threatened me again, but this time, I'm not listening. I'm going to tell Diana about her and Irelia on the final night. I need those points. And besides, she can't kill me. I'm immune at the League.'_ Leona reasoned with herself, fingering her phone.

Syndra had forgotten to erase all evidence.

Leona's phone had still been recording when she'd threatened the warrior.

"So, what happened to your hair?" Leona quickly changed the subject.

"Well, you see..."

* * *

 **Earlier that night...**

After she and Syndra had escaped from Riven's room, they'd headed back into the Institute.

"Ok... See you tomorrow?" Diana turned to go down the Independent Factions wing, bank account 50RP less.

"See you tomorrow." Replied the sovereign, floating towards the Ionian wing.

Diana briefly wondered where Syndra lived, as she'd never seen the mage in the Independent Factions wing and she most certainly did not live in the Ionian wing.

Wait... So why was she going into the Ionian wing?

The Scorn of the Moon decided that it was in her best interests not to wonder and to purge all such thoughts from her mind.

Instead, she turned her back on the Independent Factions wing and raced towards the infirmary.

* * *

"SORAKA! IT'S AN EMERGENCY!" Diana yelled, pounding on the infirmary door.

It opened almost immediately. "Scorn of the Moon! What's the problem?" The Starchild asked worriedly, still in her usual outfit and holding a bucket of popcorn in one hand.

"It's my hair!" Diana reached into her pocket and pulled out her severed locks, which Syndra had given to her before they'd parted ways. "Could you possibly re-attach it?"

Soraka narrowed her eyes.

 _'And to think. I missed the best part of Frozen for this!'_

"No. Good night."

The door slammed in Diana's face.

Growling, the Starchild returned to her office, where a mute and a fox were waiting for her.

"Who was it?" Ahri asked, golden eyes riveted to the screen of her laptop where the movie was playing off of.

"Diana. Stupid hair..." Soraka muttered, setting the popcorn onto the coffee table.

"...?" Said Sona.

"She said that we can rewind the movie, if you want." Ahri translated, talking telepathically with her girlfriend.

":)"

"NO! THE TENSION IS GONE! NOW I'LL NEVER KNOW WHY HAN BETRAYED ANNA!" Soraka wailed, flopping onto the couch.

"... It's _Frozen_ , Soraka. And this is the ninth time that we're re-watching it."

"IT MATTERS NOT! OH, THE DRAMA, THE WAIT! THAT WAS THE ONLY SCENE WORTH WATCHING IN THE ENTIRE MOVIE!"

":("

Soraka looked over at Sona. "What did she just say?"

Ahri fixed a neutral look onto her face. "She told you to let it go."

* * *

 **Present Time...**

"I fell out of a tree." Diana lied, throwing the empty cup at the garbage only for it to bounce off of the rim. Glaring, the Scorn of the Moon incinerated it with a blast of the moon's energy.

"You... Fell out... Of a tree." Leona repeated slowly.

"Yes." Diana deadpanned. If Leona was going to make up such a ridiculous lie, well... So would she.

Sighing, the Solari warrior made for the bedroom. "I'm too tired to argue with you. Good night."

"Night, Leo."

* * *

 **The next morning...**

Leona finished up breakfast and decided to head to the library again.

 _'I need to be able to spy on someone without actually being there. That would be safest...'_ She mused. _'What I need is a... Is a...'_

The Solari warrior stopped walking as she realized something.

"Oh, I am stupid..." She laughed aloud.

Cassiopeia, who was slithering by, stopped. "I never pegged you for a fool, Radiant Dawn. Is something the matter~?"

Leona was feeling slightly creeped out. Cassiopeia looked a little _too_ interested.

"... Er...Nothing... Good day!" And with that, Leona ran out as fast as she could.

Cassiopeia stared after the retreating Solari, chuckling to herself. "Every problem is an opportunity. Eventually, they all come crawling back." She mused to herself out loud.

Sivir, who was walking by, just kept going on her way to the library, not even deeming it worth her time to glare at the serpent. Or ask her why she was talking to herself like a weirdo.

* * *

 _'Ok... So this is Vi's room, which means that it's gotta be one of the other rooms...'_ Leona mused to herself. She decided to start with the first door.

 _Knock knock knock!_

The Radiant Dawn tapped her foot nervously.

The door opened.

"Why, hello, Leona." Jayce smiled, almost blinding the sun warrior with the whiteness of his teeth. "To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?" He asked in a suave voice, leaning against the door frame.

"Oh, uh, sorry... I was looking for Heimerdinger... Do you know which room he's in?" Leona asked politely.

Jayce frowned. "Oh. He's the last door on the left."

"Thank you. Have a nice day!" The Radiant Dawn smiled and then turned to go.

"You too." Jayce closed the door.

 _'Ok then. Wait... Did Jayce say last door on the left or the right?'_ Leona stared at the last two doors. _'Crap...'_

Well, there was a 50% chance of getting it right.

Deciding that she liked the odds, she picked one of the doors and knocked.

She waited for a bit and was just about to leave when it opened.

"Vi, I told you that I'm not taking your collar o- Why, hello, Leona...!" Caitlyn's eyes widened as she realized that it was not her Enforcer standing before her and that she was wearing nothing but a towel, her hair dripping water onto the floor. "H-how can I help you?"

Leona's face reddened and she looked away. "O-oh! I'm sorry, Sheriff! I must have gotten the wrong door! I'll just be on my way..."

 _'Well that was awkward...'_ Leona thought, crossing the hall to Heimerdinger's door as Caitlyn went back into her room, still beet red.

 _Knockknockknock!_

...

...

...

"SPECIMEN DETECTED! SPECIMEN DETECTED!"

Leona jumped, frantically looking around for the source of the mechanical female voice.

"SPECIMEN ANALYSIS WILL NOW BEGIN. SPECIMEN HAS A FAINT MAGICAL AURA.

SPECIES: HUMAN FEMALE.

APPROXIMATE AGE:-"

"Wait what?!" The Radiant Dawn exclaimed as she realized that the voice was coming from the wall beside her.

"-SPECIMEN IDENTIFIED: MORDEKAISER, THE MASTER OF METAL!"

"WAIT WHAT?!" Leona exclaimed, feeling slightly offended. Mordekaiser wasn't even _human!_... Or female.

 _'It's because of the armour isn't it.'_ She grumbled to herself.

The door opened. "Hello Mor- wait, you're not Mordekaiser..." Heimerdinger said in a confused voice. He took off his goggles, polished them, and then snapped them back on. "... Nope, not Mordekaiser."

"Er, hello, Professor Heimerdinger, could I ask-"

"Perhaps I need to rewire the scanners on Marvis..." The yordle mused to himself. "Or replace the main Hexawire Firecircuit-"

"Professor Heimerdinger...?" Leona tried again.

"Or perhaps it is the seventh gear that refuses to rotate again-"

"Professor Heimerdinger!"

"WHOWHATWHEREMUSHROOMS- Oh, hello, Leona. I'm very sorry about that. What can I help you with?" The inventor snapped out of his reverie.

"Do you by chance have a tiny camera that I could use?"

A few minutes later...

"And so you hook it up to your computer or phone like this. But it only has a one hour lifespan, so use it wisely!" Heimerdinger finished, and shoved a tiny gun into Leona's hands.

(The gun shoots out the camera, not bullets, calm down peeps... *looks over shoulder* NO! CAITLYN! I SWEAR THAT THERE ARE NO BULLETS IN THERE!)

The door closed, and Leona sighed in relief.

In her hands was a microscopic camera (and a gun), which would be able to latch onto her target's clothing and record everything around it for an hour. Including audio and video.

 _'Hopefully, I'll would get something good out of it. But it sucks that it only works for an hour...'_

Shrugging, the Radiant Dawn headed out of the Piltovian wing.

She had a match in 20 minutes, after all.

* * *

"That's a good suggestion. Let's go ask Heimerdinger." Diana said, walking with Syndra outside in the gardens.

"Of course it's a good suggestion. _I_ made it." Syndra smirked.

"Er, sure." The Scorn of the Moon agreed, rolling her eyes.

They made it to the Piltovian wing, where they ran into a dilemma.

"Which door is the Dinger's?" Diana mused.

"I say we knock on a random door and ask." Syndra suggested, turning to knock on the first door.

It opened very quickly. "Why, hello, ladies, what can I-"

"Shove it, pretty-boy." Syndra snarled. "Where's the Dinger's room?"

Jayce gulped as the Dark Sovereign glared at him menacingly. "L-last door on the left..."

Syndra smiled (and let me tell you, it was NOT a very reassuring sight) at Jayce and then closed his own door in his face (with her magic, of course).

Jayce stared at his door. "What's with everyone looking for Heimer today..." He muttered to himself.

Diana took the lead as she and Syndra walked down to the last door on the left. The mage was wearing a very satisfied smirk on her face. "Told you my suggestions always work."

The Scorn of the Moon only acknowledged the boast with an eye roll and then knocked on the door.

 _KNOCKKNOCKKNOCKKNOCKKNOCK!_

...

...

...

"TWO SPECIMENS DETECTED! TWO SPECIMENS DETECTED!"  
Syndra looked around them. "What is this?!"

"SPECIMEN ONE ANALYSIS WILL NOW BEGIN. SPECIMEN HAS A FAINT MAGICAL AURA.

SPECIES: HUMAN FEMALE.  
AGE:-"

"That is not creepy at all." Diana said. "I think this analysis is for me."

"-SPECIMEN IDENTIFIED: TARIC, THE GEM KNIGHT!"

"Wait... WHAT?!" Diana exploded. "TARIC ISN'T EVEN FEMALE! AND I CLEARLY HAVE BETTER HAIR THAN HIM... EVEN WITH MY NEW HAIRCUT!"

Syndra burst into laughter. "This is truly, truly, _truly_ outrageous!"

The Scorn of the Moon glared.

"SPECIMEN TWO ANALYSIS WILL NOW BEGIN."

"THIS SHIT IS BUSTED!" Diana yelled.

"SPECIMEN HAS A VERY STRONG MAGICAL AURA.

SPECIES: HUMAN FEMALE.

AGE-"

"This is sooo going to be wrong." Diana muttered.

"-SPECIMEN IDENTIFIED: SYNDRA, THE DARK SOVEREIGN!"

The Dark Sovereign fell onto the ground laughing.

The door opened. "Syndra, Taric! What a sur- wait, you aren't Taric..." He realized, staring at Diana.

"No, I'm not." The Lunari warrior grumbled. "Heimerdinger, we need a tiny camera."

"Hm, you too? Ok then." The inventor went inside. "I'll be right back!"

Syndra stopped laughing. "Did you just hear what I just heard?"

"What, you mean the _thing_ call me TARIC?"

"No... He said, 'Hm, you too?'! You know what this means?"

Diana froze. "Leona has already been here."

"We can do this still. We just need to pick a different target than her."

* * *

 _"_ Welcome to Summoners Rift!"

The Scorn of the Moon opened her eyes and looked around.

"What is this, a skin party?" She hissed disbelievingly.

Valkyrie Leona shrugged. "Possibly."

Justicar Syndra whistled. "Matching skins, you two. I like it."

"Shut up, Golden Girl." Diana snapped, glaring down at her 'Dark Valkyrie' outfit, and then at her short blue hair. SHORT. Blue. Hair.

(Still not sure if her hair is blue or purple. Keeping it at blue for now, cuz I think the color changes to purple around the middle.)

The Fist of Shadow nodded at Diana. "Nice haircut." And then she ran off to lane.

The Frost Archer seconded the statement before striding off to bot.

Diana glared after her teammates. She'd hoped that the summoning magic would somehow magically grow it back. But NoOoOo. It only works if a champion's hair gets cut off _ON_ the Fields.

The Scorn of the Moon headed for the shopkeeper and grabbed her items (the Institute had changed them back! Hurray!), starting off for midlane. She stopped.

"Hey, wait a second. Who's mid, you or me, Syndra?"

The Dark Sovereign floated over to the shopkeeper. "You. Apparently, I'm jungle."

Diana coughed. " _Stalkers_. Blade...!"

"Stalkers Blade." Syndra hissed at the shopkeeper, who obliged, sliding the knife over to the mage, who pocketed it.

"I think it's a really fitting item for you." Diana smirked, quickly running down to her lane before her jungler could retaliate.

Glaring after her accomplice, Syndra headed for blue.

" **Top lane. Give me leash.** " She called mentally, arriving at blue to see Blood Moon Akali already waiting in the bush. The Dark Sovereign decided to not say anything about the summoners going off the 'meta', because that would mean actually talking to someone.

* * *

 **A few minutes later...**

" **So let me get this straight.** " Diana said telepathically to her teammates while the enemy midlaner hurled knives and insults at her. Mostly about her hair. " **They have Blood Moon Thresh, Blood Moon Kalista, Blood Moon Elise, and Blood Moon Shen, yet** _ **we**_ **have Blood Moon Akali?** "

" **Sounds about right.** " Replied Amethyst Ashe.

" **I do not understand this...** " Said Akali, who was fighting Shen at top. " **They could have had a full Blood Moon team, yet why am I here?** "

" **My summoner says it's because your summoner is a troll, Akali.** " Leona chipped in helpfully. " **Apparently, Syndra was supposed to be our top and Tryndamere our jungle. Plus Zilean has another match right now.** "

" **A disruption of a balanced team.** " Sniffed the Fist of Shadow.

" **Syndra, give me a gank.** " Diana directed to the jungler.

Within moments, the Dark Sovereign was hidden in the bush leading to the river, waiting to ambush the enemy midlaner.

Warring Kingdoms Katarina shunpo'd under her tower. "I can see you, Goldie!" She yelled at Syndra. "It's called, 'I have a fucking ward there, dumb shit!'"

"An army couldn't stand against me. What chance do YOU have?!" The Dark Sovereign snarled, voice reverberating off the trees as she ran for the Noxian anyways.

2 Minutes later...

"FIRST BLOOD: An enemy has been slain!"

"An ally has been slain!"

" **Worth.** " Syndra said simply as she waited on the respawn timer.

A few minutes later, down at bottom lane...

"Hey, Leona, ready to engage?" Ashe asked, readying a volley of arrows.

Leona stared blankly at Ashe. "You're married! And we aren't even dating!"

"... What?"

"... OH! You meant THAT kind of engage!" The Radiant Dawn laughed awkwardly. "Hehe... YEAH LET'S GO IN!"

 _'What is this competition doing to me...!?'_ The Solari warrior lamented to herself as she launched a sword-shaped beam of sunlight and smashed into Kalista.

A minute later...

"Enemy double kill!"

" **Leona, are you feeling alright?** " Ashe asked worriedly.

" **She's fine, don't worry about it. RIGHT, LEONA?** " Diana cut in.

" **Yup. I'm fine. Sorry about that, Ashe.** " Leona apologized.

When the Solari warrior respawned, she met up with Diana and Syndra at the dragon pit.

"Ok, whatever is going on with you right now, cut it out, Leo. We need to win." Diana hissed at Leona as they attacked the dragon.

"I'll try." The Radiant Dawn responded, glancing over at the Dark Sovereign, who was currently hurling spheres at the large reptile.

After she'd engaged the enemy team, she'd been distracted thinking about the competition and had missed it when Thresh hooked Ashe. Seconds later, the Frost Archer had become a pin-cushion, courtesy of Kalista, and Leona had followed soon thereafter.

Which had made her think about Syndra's threat to her. And reminded her that the Ionian mage was on her team. And then reminded her that Syndra couldn't kill her at the Institute. Which had made her think-

Well, you get the point.

Once the dragon was dead, Leona headed back to bottom lane while Diana and Syndra went to mid.

"I'm interested to see how this plays out." The Dark Sovereign smiled, floating into the bush, toying with a small golden orb.

"How what plays out?" Diana asked, running straight through the bush and hacking at a minion. The Sinister Blade was back at her team's base.

"This game. Katarina is on the _opposite_ team, and Ashe is on _our_ team."

"Oh..." The Scorn of the Moon realized what her accomplice was thinking. "OH..."

They shared a glance. And then they headed down to gank bot.

* * *

"Akali! COME TO THE DARK SIDE!" Elise hissed, beckoning to the Fist of Shadow. The teams stood on opposite ends of the baron pit.

Akali rolled her eyes. "Believe me, I want to. I'm even in my Blood Moon skin. But the summoners..."

She proceeded to go on a rant and didn't even notice when her team engaged.

"An ally has been slain!" (Syndra, who accidentally smited Shen instead of igniting him, gutted by a knife as she cursed at being 4 'levels' below everyone else.)

"An enemy has been slain!" (Diana, blasting Thresh up the ass with a moon beam because he criticized her hair.)

"Double kill!" (Diana, attempting to hit Shen but ramming Kalista in the face with her _khopesh_ instead _._ )

"Enemy double kill!" (Leona, blocking many knives for Ashe.)

"Enemy triple kill!" (Diana, killed by a shunpo from Katarina. Elise yells at the Noxian for kill-stealing.)

" **AKALI! DO SOMETHING!** " Syndra roared through the telepathy link, waiting impatiently in respawn limbo.

The Fist of Shadow snapped out of her trance. "What? Oh shit..."

Ashe ran past her, bleeding in several places but still with half health thanks to Leona body-blocking most of Katarina's knives and Elise's spiderlings.

Akali ran in.

"An enemy has been slain!" (Akali, shadow dancing to Elise and cutting her spider head off. Katarina laughing at the Spider Queen as Shen tells them both to be quiet.)

"ENEMY QUADRA KILL!" (Katarina, using Death Lotus AGAIN)

" **Fucking Death Lotus...** " Diana growled. " **It's cheap as fuck.** "

" **Hey, at least you got a double kill.** " Ashe remarked as she ran through the jungle to find a place for safe recalling.

" **Balance is truly a bitch sometimes...** " Akali muttered to no one in particular.

(In case you were wondering...

Alive on Red Team:  
Ashe

Alive on Blue Team:  
Katarina  
Shen)

"Interesting that Ashe is the only one who survived Katarina's Death Lotus..." Syndra remarked to Diana, both standing together in Respawn Limbo.

"Yes... Very interesting that she was the only one left alive indeed..." Diana mused. "It seems that Katarina has a weak spot after all."

"ENEMY PENTAKILL!"

"AN ENEMY IS LEGENDARY!"

"... Nevermind..." Syndra said. "Ashe is dead..."

"And jungle Syndra is not viable." Diana noted.

" **DEATH LOTUS CHEAP AS FUCK! #NOSKILLNOOB!** " Syndra yelled at the other team in /all chat.

" **You're one to talk, jungler.** " Katarina snapped back. " **You're just jealous because I got a pentakill and you don't even HAVE a kill.** "

The Dark Sovereign found herself standing at the fountain again, having just respawned, but didn't move. " **Mind your mouth, Noxian bitch. I have a Stalkers Blade and I'm not afraid to use it.** " She snarled.

" **I have a Stalkers Blade as well, Dark Sovereign. And I** _ **do**_ **use it.** " Elise cut in. Well, how else was she supposed to stalk Zyra?

Who knew that watching someone fertilize plants could be so... Satisfying.

* * *

 **After the game...**

"That was because I took your knives last night, wasn't it." Ashe glared at the Sinister Blade, who calmly flipped a dagger from one hand to the other.

"What are you talking about? I'm not petty like that." Katarina smirked back. "You were an enemy, and I wanted a pentakill."

* * *

Now back in her usual armour, Leona ran her hand over the gun in her pocket as she glanced at her teammates and enemies in the post-game lobby.

Perhaps...

She rested a finger on the trigger and stealthily pointed it at Akali, who was talking with Shen.

 _'Well, here goes nothing...'_ Leona thought as she pulled the trigger and the tiny camera shot out, latching onto Akali's left kama.

 _'Not what I was aiming for, but I guess it works. I mean, she goes everywhere with those things, after all.'_ Leona that smugly. _'Now, to find another couple to stalk while I wait for the video feed.'_

* * *

"Why Akali?" Diana whispered to Syndra.

The two were currently stationed in the alley next to Morgana's bakery, in the shadow of a dumpster.

"Why not?" Syndra whispered back. "And also, my source said to follow her."

The Stalker Duo had followed the Fist of Shadow outside to _Sinful Succulence_ , where she'd gone inside and had been for the past 45 minutes.

"So, who's your source?" Diana asked.

"I'm not te- shhh!"

The Scorn of the Moon glared at Syndra out of the corner of her eye, prepared to say that she hadn't been saying anything, but then realized that by saying that she would be contradicting herself.

Akali walked out of the bakery, holding a paper bag stamped with the bakery logo.

"Huh. Never knew that she was a foodie." Syndra remarked as she walked past the mouth of the alley.

They gave the Ionian ninja a minor headstart before slowly emerging from the alley.

Lux stopped walking. "What were you two doing in that alley?" She asked with her usual bright smile.

"None of your business." Syndra snapped.

The Demacian's smile never faltered. "If you say so!"

And with that, she skipped away, humming 'Hakuna Matata' to herself.

Diana shivered. "That girl gives me the chills..."

"I agree. I just want to blast that smile off her face..." Syndra growled, clawing her fingers and summoning a dark sphere to her fingertips.

The Scorn of the Moon glanced over at her partner. "Dark Sovereign. Let us go follow the Fist of Shadow, yes?"

"Hm? Oh. Yes. Of course." Syndra looked over at the Lunari warrior, the dark sphere disappearing. "But can you just give me 5 minutes? Go on ahead to the Institute. I'll catch up."

* * *

"COOKIES? AGAIN?!" Diana exclaimed disbelievingly as the Dark Sovereign floated up the steps to the Institute.

"What? Morgana makes the _best_ peanut butter macadamia cookies." Syndra argued with a faraway look in her eyes as she reached into the paper bag that she was holding and lifted a cookie up as if it were precious gold.

Syndra then unceremoniously crammed the whole thing into her mouth while Diana watched, unsure whether to feel disgusted or awed.

The sovereign glared at Diana. "Fwhat ah you wooking aht?"

"... Nothing." The Lunari warrior replied. "Let's go find Akali..."

* * *

"I'm starting to hate your source." Diana whispered, much to the annoyance of Syndra.

"I assure you, my source is very reliable." The mage snapped back.

The two of them were currently floating up in the rafters of the Ionian wing, watching Akali. The Fist of Shadow was currently standing outside of a door, and had been there for the past ten minutes.

Nothing interesting was happening, but then...

Zed walked into the hallway. Syndra's eyebrows flew up.

 _'What's ZED of all people doing in the Ionian wing?!'_ She wondered, but decided to not say anything out loud about it.

"Quick, shoot her now, so we can get out!" She hissed instead.

Diana brought out the gun that Heimerdinger had given to her and took aim, squeezing one eye shut.

* * *

"HOW THE FUCK DID YOU MANAGE TO HIT _ZED_?!" The Dark Sovereign screeched, glaring at the laptop screen. "HE WAS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FUCKING HALLWAY!"

"WELL I'M SORRY THAT I'M NO ASHE OR CAITLYN!" Diana yelled back. "AND WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME HITTING ZED?!"

"HE'S NOT DATING! THAT WAS A WASTE OF A CAMERA, AND DINGER SAID THAT IT WAS HIS LAST ONE!" Syndra shouted.

Good thing that the two were arguing in Diana's room... Which was empty. And had soundproofing runes on the walls.

"HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT HE'S NOT DATING?!"

"HE'S PRACTICALLY THE ONLY FRIEND I HAVE OF COURSE I KNOW!"

"Wait, you're friends with _Zed_?" Diana asked incredulously.

"What's it to you?" Syndra huffed, crossing her arms.

"... Well, it's just that..." The Scorn of the Moon stopped speaking once the mage's eyes started glowing. "Er... I mean, it makes perfect sense! You both hate Ionia, you've both murdered plenty of Ionians, you are both psychot-" She stopped. "I'm not helping matters am I."

Syndra shook her head.

 _Knock! Knock!_

"DEEDEE! OPEN UP! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!"

"I wonder who that could possibly be." Diana remarked, rolling her eyes.

Only one person ever called her Deedee.

Syndra tried to keep a straight face at the nickname.

Diana walked over to the door and pulled it open. "What."

Leona looked excited. "Diana... You won't believe what just happened..."

The Scorn of the Moon raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"Yes, do tell, Leona." Syndra drawled, crossing her legs and leaning back on Diana's couch.

Leona was practically bouncing with excitement, like Ziggs on his bombs. "It's Fiora. Rumour has it that she's finally entered the dating pool!"

Diana had to resist the urge to slap her girlfriend. "So why are you telling us? Would you not exploit this information and figure it out for yourself to get some points?"  
Leona nodded. "Yeah, but here's the thing: there's 3000RP circulating the betting pools already, and a 2400RP prize for whoever finds out the identity of the Grand Bitch's lover. Twisted Fate himself is overseeing this!"

Diana's jaw dropped. "Two _thousand_ , four hundred RP?!"

"TWENTY-FOUR HUNDRED RP?!" Syndra echoed.

Leona nodded. "Yes."

"So, what you're proposing is that we team up and then split the money 3 ways?" Said the Scorn of the Moon.

"Exactly." The Radiant Dawn agreed.

"Welcome to the team!" Syndra announced triumphantly.

* * *

"Ok, so, first thing's first." Leona said, peering at Diana and Syndra over her dinner. "Who are the possible candidates?"

"Fiora's a bitch. Therefore, it will be another bitch." Syndra declared, pleased with her logic and smiling as she nibbled on a pork bun.

"With that logic, it's obvious who Fiora is dating." Diana smirked, stabbing a potato with her fork.

"Who?" Syndra pressed eagerly.

"You." Diana announced.

The reactions following her statement were slightly puzzling.

Leona choked on her tomato bisque.

Syndra dropped the pork bun and shot out two dark spheres. One hit Diana in the stomach and knocked the heretic off her chair, while the other shot over to Leona and pounded her gently on the back, as if trying to help the choking warrior.

Once the Scorn of the Moon had recovered from her shock and gotten back onto her chair, she found Leona and Syndra locked in a staring contest. It looked like they were having a conversation through staring alone.

 **Syndra: What was that?**

 **Leona: I thought about you and Irelia...**

 **Syndra: You will not mention it to Diana.**

 **Leona: Wait, you're sleeping with Diana?**

 **Syndra: No, I said do not mention it to Diana!**

 **Leona: Not to mention what, that you're sleeping with my girlfriend?!**

 **Syndra: NO! Don't mention me and Irelia to Diana!**

 **Leona: Diana is sleeping with Irelia as well?!**

 **Syndra: NEVERMIND! GODS, YOU'RE STUPID!**

Diana glanced back and forth between the two women she was sitting with. "Is something going on between you two?"

"Nothing." Syndra said at the same time that Leona asked, "You're sleeping with Syndra?"

"What?!" Diana stared at her girlfriend.

"FORGET IT!" The sovereign yelled, shooting a glare at the Solari knight. At the next table, Ahri briefly glanced over and then said to Soraka, "See? Even Syndra wants you to forget it!"

"No! How can I forget what I have already forgotten? The tension, the drama, all gone!" The Starchild wailed.

Sona plucked a few notes on her etwahl, which sounded suspiciously like 'Let it Go'.

"Oh my gods Soraka, we can just watch the movie again!" Ahri exclaimed. "OK?!"

Soraka gasped. "You would do that? For me?"

"Sure. It's only like the eleventh time..." The Nine-Tailed Fox grumbled.

At the next next table, Yasuo was trying to enjoy his pudding. Syndra's yelling had startled him, and the Unforgiven had jumped, his pudding cup flying out of his hands to impale itself on Sejuani's helmet.

And that was how yet another fight started in the dining hall.

* * *

"INCOMING!"

Everybody looked up to see Ziggs carrying a massive balloon filled with brown liquid.

Oh, did I mention that it was a food fight? Er... Food _war_?

The yordle laughed manically and dropped the balloon.

"NOOOO! THIS WILL TAKE FOREVER TO WASH OUT OF MY FURRR!" Ahri shrieked as the substance splashed all over her.

"GRAVY!" Lulu screamed. "GRAVY IS SOOO NOT PURPLE!"

"DEMACIANS, TO ME!" Yelled Jarvan IV, sticking his flagpole into the air.

"NOXIANS, TO ME!" Rasped Swain, but nobody could hear him.

"NOXIANS, TO ME!" Roared Darius, and the Noxians swarmed towards him.

"TEAM IONIA... TO UH... KARMA?" Shouted Kennen.

"NO, IONIANS TO IRELIA! SHE'S THE CAPTAIN OF THE GUARD!" Karma called out.

"WHAT ABOUT SHEN? HE'S LEADER OF THE KINKOU!" Master Yi argued.

And so, with practiced ease, the champions in the dining hall split into various little huddles around the room.

(This happens quite often at the Institute. Just an FYI.)

"Uh, ok guys... When Noxus decides to attack Demacia, we run, right?" Diana affirmed with her team.

"We Targonians do not run from a battle!" Pantheon declared, planting his shield over his chest, gravy dripping off his helmet.

"Oh, yes we do, if it involves the champions of the League and food." Leona argued.

"Well, I could always just bind everybody and Syndra could dump everything on their heads." Morgana suggested.

"That's cheating, Morgana. You're not allowed to use magic during a food fight. It's rule number one. And it's also the only rule." Diana explained.

Syndra sniffed. "What a stupid rule."

"It is ok, my love. I will protect you!" Pantheon raised his shield over Morgana's head just as someone threw a glob of jello at her. It stuck to the shield in a gloopy green mess.

On second thought... That might not have been jello.

Leona grabbed her own shield from next to the table. "Fine. If we're fighting, then I shall protect De-"

"Don't even think about it, Leo." Diana snapped. "I can take care of myself just fine."

"NOXUS! ATTACK!" Darius yelled.

"NOXUS! DEFEND DRAAAVEN!" Draven yelled, hiding himself behind Talon. "Draven cannot afford to ruin his mustache tonight!"  
Naturally, no one listened to Draven.

A barrage of mashed potatoes, steaks, and pork ribs flew out from the Noxian corner of the dining hall and towards everyone else.

Piltover took it as a great opportunity to load up their weapons with food missiles and launch them at Zaun, while Ionia, ever the peaceful nation, grabbed all of the intact food to horde it for later.

All of the other groups immediately chose someone else to attack.

"Team Targon!" Pantheon called to his teammates. "Let us take on that group over there!"

"Oh hell no! That's Bandle City!" Leona yelled. "Lets get Ionia!"

"NOOOOO!" Syndra cried. "Get Demacia! They're annoying!"

Diana found it odd that the Dark Sovereign didn't want to attack Ionia, but didn't question it as at that moment, Piltover decided to engage them, having just buried the Zaunite team under a mountain of noodles.

Caitlyn jumped onto a table. "In my sights!" The Sheriff called out, her sniper rifle in her hands.

Diana quickly jumped behind Leona, who's shield took the tomato missile instead.

The Radiant Dawn glanced behind her. "Whatever happened to 'I can take care of myself'?" She smirked.

"I-I slipped on some gravy!" Diana lied.

Piltover got ready to fully engage.

Jayce stuck some macaroni into his hammer.

Caitlyn reloaded on tomatoes.

Vi took off her gauntlets and replaced them with pieces of bread.

Ezreal grabbed as many vegetables as he could.

Jinx stuffed blueberries into her bra- wait a second, Jinx isn't even on the Piltovian team!

Vi seemed to realize this at the same time as I did. "Hey! What are you doing?!"

"HAHA! LIKE MY JUGS, FAT HANDS?" The Loose Canon stuck her tongue out and tried to dance seductively with her misshapen, lumpy 'bloobs'.

"..."

Caitlyn shot Jinx in the knee with a tomato.

"Heeey! That really hurt... My feelings!" Jinx whined. "Hat Lady is mean!"

Morgana tapped Pantheon on the shoulder. "Should we attack while Jinx is distracting them?"

The Artisan of War was just about to reply when...

"DEMACIAAAA!"

It happened.

Noxus vs. Demacia.

Immediately, everyone stopped fighting to watch the ultimate showdown.

Diana realized something at the same time as Syndra and Leona.

"... Fiora is there!" They all said simultaneously, and then proceeded to look at each other.

"JINX!"

"DOUBLE JINX!"

"TRIPLE JINX!"

"QUADRUPLE JINX!"

"PENTA JINX YOU OWE ME A GRAGGY ICE!"

Jinx walked over. "I don't owe you nothing!"

"Beat it, Crazy." Syndra snapped. "Go take your non-existent boobs somewhere else."

Jinx pouted. "Aww, the floating white-haired lady told us to leave, Fishbones. She's so mean!"

"SHH! The fight is starting!" Morgana hissed.

* * *

 **ULTIMATE FOOD WAR SHOWDOWN**

Team Demacia:

Lux  
Garen  
Jarvan IV  
Fiora  
Quinn

Team Noxus:

Swain  
Darius  
Draven  
Katarina  
Cassiopeia  
Talon

The two teams stood at opposite ends of the room, covered in gravy and other food bits, glaring at each other.

Perhaps Noxus had an unfair advantage because they had more people.

But they also had Draven.

"Noo! I got gravy in my mustache!" The Noxian wailed, looking at his reflection in a spoon.

Everyone ignored him.

Lux initiated the fight by flinging a handful of brussel sprouts at Draven.

"EEEK! BRUSSEL SPROUTS!" He shrieked and dove underneath a table. The Glorious Executioner spotted something. "Ooo, sausage!"

Darius hurled a leg of roast lamb at Garen, who cleaved it in half with his sword while Jarvan danced around his flagpole, taunting the Noxians. Cassiopeia used her tail to rapidly launch shish kebobs at him, and the prince stopped dancing. When she ran out of skewers to throw, the serpent slithered over to Draven's table and snatched his sausage from him.

"NOO! MY WIENER!" The Noxian wailed, dropping to the ground.

Swain decided to 1v1 Quinn.

Beatrice and Valor were circling above, throwing corn at each other while Swain was using the power of SALAD to attempt to get Quinn.

The Demacian was employing all of her skills to dodge the flying lettuce and croutons.

"FLYING RED LOTUS KICK!" She yelled, jumping into the air and kicking a head of cabbage at Swain like a soccer ball.

The Noxian hobbled out of the way just in time.

"OVERHEAD SPIKE!" Quinn called out, smashing another head of cabbage at the Master Tactician in a perfect spike.

(Ok, where are all these cabbages coming from?! Swain sure isn't throwing them!)

"THE MACARENA!" Shouted Demacia's Wings as she started dancing.

Fiora glanced over at her and turned her head up. "Deesgraceful! You're dancing is _truly_ 'orrendous!"

(Just picture her with a french accent.)

She then spotted Talon and Katarina, who were chucking cabbages at the Demacian's (Ah, so that's where they're coming from!).

"OH! HOW I LONG VOR A VORTHY OPPONENT!" The Grand Bi- er, Duelist, mockingly cried out.

The assassins locked eyes and then glared at Fiora, who had selected a baguette in place of her rapier.

Katarina grabbed a whole arsenal of carrots and quickly replaced all her knives with them. Shunpoing to Fiora, she released her infamous Death Lotus while yelling, "ONLY FOOLS HESITATE!"

The spectators quickly ducked to avoid being hit by the carrots. Leona shielded Diana, who didn't complain this time.

"DEMACIAA!" Yelled Lux, Garen, and Jarvan at the same time.

"NOXUS!" Countered Darius.

...

...

...

Diana peeked over her girlfriend's shield to see...

The fight still going.

The only people still left standing were Fiora, Garen, Darius, and Talon. Draven was checking his reflection under the table while whimpering about his lost wiener.

Garen and Darius immediately dropped their respective weapons and grabbed the largest piece of meat that they could find (GET YOUR MINDS OUTTA THE GUTTER PEOPLE!). Garen was now holding a whole chicken, and Darius was brandishing a roast pig at the Might of Demacia.

"Oho! Ze dog of ze 'ouse Du Couteau is still standing?" Fiora mocked Talon, still holding the baguette.

Talon said nothing back, mashed potatoes, gravy, soup, and various other things clinging to his cape as he seized two of Katarina's larger discarded carrots.

Riven's eyes widened. "Oh my... Those are some big carrots..." She whispered breathlessly, causing Zac to look over at her curiously.

Needless to say, it was very odd to see two people fencing with carrots and bread instead of live steel.

"You know, I think that would be a great exercise to add to the training of the army..." Irelia mused. Shen looked over at her.

"Irelia... Ionia has no standing army."

"I wasn't talking about Ionia." The Will of the Blades responded. Unbeknowst to most, she had a miniature army of action figures under her bed.

She didn't like to talk about it.

"That's it!" Syndra exclaimed. "Fiora is dating Talon!"

"WHAT?" The avatars of the sun and moon turned to stare at the mage.

"Talon is with Katarina!" Leona argued.

 _'Hahaha... Forgot that she didn't know about ASHE and Katarina...'_ Syndra and Diana thought in unison.

"Well, they are both masters of the blade, _and_ they are bitches!" The Dark Sovereign reasoned.

"Hm. That is actually a plausible theory..." Diana mused.

"But Talon is already with Katarina!" Leona repeated.

Syndra shrugged. "What if they broke up? Not like we'd know. And maybe he's a player." She winked.

The Solari warrior stared blankly at the sovereign. Then she turned to her girlfriend.

"That reminds me. Di, are you sleeping with Irelia?"

"... WHAT?! WHERE THE HELL DID _THAT_ COME FROM?! And why IRELIA of all people?!"

Morgana glared at them. "Be quite over there! Fiora has Talon pinned up against the wall!"

"WHAT WHERE?!" The trio cried out, turning to see the Grand Duelist holding the Blade's Shadow at baguette-point against the wall.

"Oh... Never mind then..." Syndra muttered.

"Hey, guys? We should get out. ASAP. The fight's about to end." Diana warned.

And everybody knew what happened after the big fight.

Anarchy. Total anarchy.

At least until the summoners showed up.

"Alright, let's get out." Leona agreed.

The trio quietly slipped out the entrance of the dining hall, much to the disappointment of Pantheon.

"Now it's only you and me..." He said to Morgana, who smirked.

"We can do this. Just keep protecting me, Panth. I've got offense covered." The Fallen Angel smiled.

* * *

"Agent Hawk-eye!" Someone hissed.

The agent glanced over and then moved away from their team, who didn't notice the absence of a member. "What is it, Agent Siren?"

"Look over there." Was the reply.

Blue eyes turned to see someone slip out of the dining hall. Someone with short hair, which was covered in the gravy that Ziggs had dropped earlier.

"Three people just slipped out. But I can't tell who they were..." Agent Siren said. "We need you to follow them."

"Why not Agent Shadow?"

"Shadow is in a match right now."

"Oh." Agent Hawk-eye said. "Right. I'll go."

"You can do this, Hawk. Remember: the balance rests on your shoulders!"

* * *

 **Scene between Syndra and Leona which occurs before they go to dinner.**

"Why are you doing this?" Asked the Radiant Dawn.

"Doing what?" Syndra asked, examining her nails.

"Helping us. There's nothing in it for you." Leona leaned forwards across the table between them. "Is there?"

The Dark Sovereign glanced over at the currently occupied bathroom. "Why do you want to know?"

"I want to know if I can trust you." Was the simple reply. "You're helping my girlfriend spy on the other champions, with the risk of being caught and possibly expelled from the Institute for breaching privacy policies. No one at the League would ever do something like that without expecting something in return. Except maybe Amumu. But you're not Amumu."

Syndra looked up from her nails and stared directly into Leona's eyes. "You're right. I'm not doing this out of the goodness of my heart."

 _'Hah. Good one. She probably doesn't even have a heart.'_ Leona thought to herself.

"I'm doing it to make sure that no one else finds out about me and Irelia." She said quietly.

The Radiant Dawn raised en eyebrow. She'd been expecting something like, "Diana promised that the loser would do MY Kog'Maw duty as well!" or, "I'm being paid." or, "I'm part of a top-secret organization at the League dedicated to protecting people's privacy and secrets."!

Syndra kept talking. "Since _you_ already know, I need to make sure that no one else finds out. The last thing either of us needs is a storm of gossip surrounding us."

"Wow. How noble." Leona said.

"You're not going to tell Diana about us, right?" The mage demanded.

Leona hesitated for a second, torn. "Uh... Nope."

Syndra noticed the hesitation and stood up. "YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TELL, RIGHT?"

Another hesitation. "N-no..."

Seconds later, the Radiant Dawn found herself airborne and unable to move.

Glowing violet eyes met amber ones. "YOU WILL STAY SILENT, YES?"

At that moment, the bathroom door opened.

"I trust that you two didn't break anything while I was gone?" Diana only half-joked, walking out of the bathroom. She stopped cold once she saw what was happening.

Her course of action was clear.

Running over to the sovereign, Diana shoved her hands into Syndra's pocket and took out a paper bag.

"SYNDRA! HERE, HAVE A COOKIE!" The Scorn of the Moon cried out desperately as she shoved a peanut butter macadamia cookie into the Dark Sovereign's mouth.

Leona dropped to the floor and Syndra sat back down on the couch, smiling as she chewed on the treat.

 _'I need to start carrying these around for emergencies...'_ Diana decided.

* * *

 **Authors Note(s): I Need Your Lo- Help!**

Writers block is a bitch. I can't do scheduled updates. Believe me, I tried, and THIS is the creation:  
AN **8000** WORD CHAPTER THAT NEARLY GAVE ME A BRAIN HEMORRHAGE 3 TIMES IN THE PROCESS OF WRITING IT.  
 _But anyways, I need your help. If you've got any good yaoi pairings, please tell me pronto!_ This chapter was going to be Ezreal x Taric, but I decided against it for two reasons. The first is that it is a very overused yaoi pairing (although I'm being a hypocrite here because of my own OTP's...) and because it would contradict with a joke I have planned for later. So instead, you get Fiora. Who you won't even- wait, I can't spoil anything o-o  
I realized that this chapter is set on the fourth day of the five which they have to do the challenge, which means that this story will be over in about another 1-3 chapters.  
Hell.  
No.  
Be forewarned: There's a twist coming up next chapter!  
So reviews are kinda messed up. I had a kind guest reviewer remind me of the yaoi duties that I have yet to fulfill, and the review isn't showing up! I'm not the only writer this has affected, nor is this the first time it has happened to me. I believe that it should be fine after I update :)

BUT THAT DON'T MEAN STOP REVIEWING O-O BECAUSE THANK YOU ALL FOR THE AMAZING REVIEWS, FAVS, AND FOLLOWS THAT ENCOURAGE ME TO CONTINUE UPLOADING ALL MY CRAZY-ASS STORIES XD

To all the guest reviewers, because I cannot PM you, I will do it here: Thanks, and so glad that you enjoy!

 _I AM CURRENTLY LOOKING FOR A BETA. IF ANYONE IS INTERESTED, PLEASE PM ME!_

So that's all. Good day!

~Creator


	6. Stalkers of The Dark- Part 2: SHE DID IT

**Chapter 6: Stalkers of The Dark- Part 2**

Leona, Diana, and Syndra slipped down the nearest hallway and into an unlocked closet. Diana flipped the lights on as Leona settled onto an upturned bucket while Syndra opted to float against a shelf cluttered with unused cleaning supplies.

"So whose room are we breaking into? Talon's, right?" The mage asked.

"Obviously, Fiora's," Leona answered. "Talon isn't even our target!"

"So?" Argued Diana, "He is _associated_ with our target."

 _"Supposedly_ associated with our target. I'm still pretty sure that he's with Katarina," The Solari knight shot back.

"Do you even know where Fiora's room is?"

"..."

"Exactly."

Leona crossed her arms. "Are you saying that you know where _Talon's_ room is?"

"..."

"Exactly." The Radiant Dawn echoed.

Syndra was getting bored, "Both of you, just shut up!"

"..."

"Good. Now, I say that we break into Fiora's room," The mage announced.

(Ah, but you might be confused on her sudden change of heart. Well, first off, let me assure you that the Sovereign _has_ a heart. And second... She might also have a hidden agenda that may or may not involve Fiora's legendary stuffed poodle collection.)

The Scorn of the Moon narrowed her eyes. "Wait, what? I thought you were arguing on behalf of breaking into Talon's room!"

Leona sighed and muttered to herself, "I never thought I'd see the day where I'm sitting in a closet, arguing with my girlfriend and the Dark Sovereign about breaking into two very dangerous people's rooms..."

No one was paying attention to her, though.

"Psh, what are you talking about? I never wanted to break into Talon's room." Syndra said innocently, batting her eyelashes.

"Wha- but you..." Diana trailed off when she caught the glare that Syndra threw her way, promising unspeakable torture if she kept arguing.

"... Fine." The Lunari warrior grumbled. She opened her mouth to say more, but then Leona slapped a hand over her mouth.

A single set of footsteps echoed through the hallway outside, coming to a stop right outside their hideout.

...

...

...

3 pairs of eyes sought each other out. 3 brains realized that the lights were still on.

Syndra contemplated throwing either Leona or Diana in front of the door while yelling, "SHE DID IT!" and making a break for it...

The door opened.

"..."

"..."

"..."

Leona, Diana, and Syndra stared disbelievingly at-

"What's his name again?" Syndra hissed to Leona, who shrugged.

The hulking man before them had glowing eyes and green-tinged skin.

Diana quickly ran through the champion roster in her head.

 _'Err, so this guy is either called Yodel or Yori or something like that...'_

The mystery man sighed, his voice deep and gravely. "I am guessing that you do not know who I am."

"Uhh, sure we do, er..." Leona tried, failing miserably.

"It's Yorick. Yorick Mori? Toplaner? Member of Pentakill?!" Yorick cried out in exasperation.

 _'Ah... Well, at least I got the first two letters right...'_ Diana conceded.

"Ahh, Yorick!" Leona laughed awkwardly. "I remember now, friend!"

Syndra saw her chance.

"SHE DID IT!" The sovereign screeched, flinging Leona into Yorick and dashing out the door.

Diana blinked. Leona groaned. Yorick stared after the fleeing Ionian.

"... I just wanted to get my shovel..." He muttered.

Syndra ran right into someone, knocking them over. Groaning, the mage sat up and snarled, "Watch where you're going!"

" _Me_? You watch where _you're_ going!" Vi hissed back, rubbing her head and standing up. She muttered some not-so-nice words under her breath and stalked away.

The Dark Sovereign was very tempted to launch a couple of dark spheres after the Piltovian, but decided that getting away was the better option at the moment.

Revenge was a slow process, after all.

* * *

Leona stepped out of the bathroom, drying her hair with a towel. "What you did earlier, Syndra. That wasn't very nice."

"Who gives a fuck if it was nice?" The Sovereign retorted.

Syndra had been in the Piltovian Wing setting mouse traps on the floor (who knew where she'd gotten those from...) when Diana had finally caught up to her. They'd headed back to Diana's room to grab a quick change of clothes and a shower before heading to the Demacian Wing. There was no way that the food battle was over yet. Not until the guys stopped throwing food at Ahri's cleavage, anyways.

Syndra and Diana were currently sitting on the couch with their 'spy-gear' on. For Syndra, that meant borrowing one of Diana's skirts and a shirt, while the Lunari warrior decided to go in completely black clothes. Which wouldn't make that much of a difference considering that her hair was white, but you try telling that to her.

Leona pulled on her dark hoodie, picking at the edges of one of the holes burnt into it. "You pushed me into Yorick so that you could get away. How am I supposed to trust that you won't just bail on us again later?"

The Dark Sovereign rolled her eyes. "Survival of the fittest. I can't promise anything about not bailing."

Diana pointed discreetly at Syndra behind the mage's back while mouthing, "She sounds like a Noxian!"

Leona squinted. "Huh?"

Syndra sighed. "I said, I can't promise anything about not bailing!"

Meanwhile, behind the mage, Diana facepalmed and tried again, emphasizing the movement of her lips. "She. Sounds. Like. A. Noxian!"

The Radiant Dawn blinked. _'... Should I tell Di that I never learned how to lip-read...'_

"Stop staring at me like tha-" Syndra stopped once she realized that Leona a) wasn't listening and b) wasn't looking at her.

She turned to see Diana moving her mouth in a really weird way.

Diana stopped mid-word once Syndra turned.

"... Hi?"

The sovereign looked at her like she was crazy.

Leona sighed and decided to drop the subject of Syndra sacrificing her so that she could get away. "Alright guys, we need a game plan."

"Wait." Diana said, reaching for the heap of clothes on the floor. She sifted through them, searching for something while her partners looked on.

"Uh, Diana, why are you holding my panties..." Questioned the Dark Sovereign.

The Scorn of the Moon quickly dropped the offending item. "I-I was moving it aside! These are your clothes, right?"

"No, I put my bra and underwear with Leona's clothes." Syndra said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "OF COURSE THOSE ARE MINE YOU IMBECILE!"

"Perfect." Diana said, ignoring the insult. She reached into the pocket of the mage's clothes and withdrew the paper bag within.

Syndra's eyes widened. "Oh. No. You. Didn't."

Leona looked on with mild apprehension as her girlfriend tucked Syndra's cookies into her pocket.

The Dark Sovereign stood up slowly. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I am taking this for safekeeping. Now come on, let's go to the Demacian Wing before the food war ends." Diana responded, making for the door.

She didn't make it there.

* * *

A few injuries and pieces of broken furniture later, Diana, Syndra, and Leona were standing outside on the lawn by the Demacian Wing. Moonlight shone down upon them as they tried to figure out their next course of action.

"THAT IS THE _**WORST**_ FUCKING IDEA THAT _**ANYONE**_ HAS _**EVER**_ HAD."

"... Actually, I think it's kind of smart."

Diana, face cut and bruised, stared disbelievingly at her girlfriend.

Syndra (without a scratch on her; go figure.) smirked. "She agrees with me. So we're doing it." The mage lifted a hand. "Ready?"

"NO! Why do I have to do it?! _Leona_ agreed with you, so why can't she do this instead?" Complained Diana.

"Leona is too heavy."

The Radiant Dawn, who had been smiling up to this point, now frowned. "Are you calling me fat?"

Syndra snorted. "No. I am stating fact- Diana is just within my parameters. And besides, I hear that muscle is heavier than fat." The sovereign winked.

 _'Whew... That was a close call.'_ She thought.

Diana was offended. "Hey! I work out just as much as she does! Just because I use my ma-"

"-Oh, just be quiet, Di. Admit it. Those cream puffs are finally catching up to you." Leona teased, not questioning at all how the most powerful mage in all of Ionia, possibly all of Valoran, could not levitate them both with magic.

The Scorn of the Moon huffed. "Well, then how come you were able to lift Riven's carrot-" she stopped herself just in time, remembering that Leona didn't know of their Riven-Lux ordeal. "-...cake..."

Syndra stifled her laughter, while Leona looked confused. "Her... What?"

"Forget it."

(I'm going on record and saying that the carrot sword should weigh roughly the same as a Leona without her armour...)

The Dark Sovereign composed herself. "Diana. Are you ready?"

Diana glared at the mage, knowing that this was payback for confiscating her cookie stash earlier. She decided not to mention it, however, as Syndra had _finally_ calmed down.

But Diana had one last point.

"So then how do you levitate your cas-ahhhh!"

Before the Lunari could finish her sentence, Syndra flung her up into the air, 2 stories above the ground. Diana floated before the windows of the rooms of the Demacian Wing, glaring down at her companions.

"Well? Start looking!" The Dark Sovereign called out, feet actually touching the ground for once.

The Scorn of the Moon huffed as Syndra floated her closer to the nearest window. Grasping the windowsill out of instinct, Diana peered inside.

Thankfully, most of the Demacian champions were still in the dining hall. No one could be sure what would have happened if trigger-happy Lux had turned and seen someone floating outside her window.

Probably a shout, a laser, and a giant beam of light. If the unlucky victim was lucky.

The room that Diana was currently inspecting had simple furnishings and a terrible color scheme. The couch was a hideous piss yellow, and there was a yellow and blue blanket lying haphazardly on said couch as if someone had been taking a nap there. The table was a dark mahogany wood, which contrasted horribly with its poor neighbor the couch, the armchairs were blue with yellow stripes, and there was a dying pink flower in a gold vase on the marble countertop. Even the fridge had little magnets with the Demacian crest on them. A large stainless steel sword rack sat right next to the window, and Diana could see a little tag hanging off it that proclaimed it as "MADE IN DEMACIA."

She was pretty sure whose room this was based on the horrible color scheme and huge sword rack alone, but seeing the woven tapestry above the mantle confirmed her guess.

A family crest was depicted on it.

The Lunari warrior looked down, "This is Garen's room. Next."

"Are you sure?" Called Leona.

"Of course I'm sure! There's a damn Crownguard crest hanging above the mantle, and it looks like some sort of Demacian unicorn took a shit in there!"

Syndra floated herself up next to Diana and looked inside. "Huh, you're right."

Leona stared up at them. "Wait a minute, Syndra I thought you said that you could only levita-"

 _WHOOM!_

"Oops! My bad!" Syndra gasped, holding a hand to her mouth in faux horror. She watched as the Solari warrior slumped to the ground, clutching her stomach. "I lost control there for a second! Must be because I am levitating both me _and_ Diana at the same time!" She said pointedly.

Leona groaned, and Diana glared at the mage. "Did you really have to do that?"

"Heh. Nope." Syndra smirked.

Leona groaned again, and this time, it sounded suspiciously like "Hitch".

The next 2 windows were both curtained over. The third, however, was open.

Syndra floated back onto the ground, and Leona shot her an angry glare as Diana inspected the room above them. The Sovereign caught the glare and raised an eyebrow. "What? It was an accident!"

"You are the most powerful mage in Ionia, and yet you can't use your magic to put all 3 of us up there?" Leona questioned disbelievingly.

Syndra rolled her eyes. "Of course I can. Puh-lease."

"Then why did you attack me?!"

"... I was bored." The Dark Sovereign admitted.

Diana looked down, having not heard the conversation, thankfully. "Hey, guys, this room might be it!"

"Are you sure?" Leona called up.

"Well, pretty sure! I think that's the Laurent crest hanging on the wall!"

A few seconds later, Leona and Syndra were both floating next to Diana, who was trying to get through the open window but failing on account of it only being half-open.

The Radiant Dawn smirked. "Cream puffs, Di. Cream puffs."

"Shut up!"

Syndra discreetly shoved the Lunari warrior into the room with her magic, sending her tumbling onto the carpet inside. The Dark Sovereign then used her magic to lift the window up fully, both her and Leona climbing inside with no problems.

Diana stared at the mage. "You couldn't do that when I was trying to get into the room!?"

Syndra put on a forgetful look. "Oopsy daisy! I forgot!"

The Scorn of the Moon narrowed her eyes and opened her mouth to snap something at Syndra. Before she could, though, Leona interrupted.

"Guys... I don't think this is Fiora's room..."

Diana huffed. "Of course it is-" she took another look around, face paling as she realized that she'd been wrong. "-not..."

"Idiot." Syndra seethed, glaring at Diana. "How the fuck did you mistake this for the Grand Bitch's room?!"

"Well I could only see half of the fucking crest!" Diana argued, stabbing a finger at a folded blanket on the floor. Half of some sort of crest was visible.

"THE LAURENT CREST IS A FUCKING _FLOWER_ , DUMBASS!"

"WELL THAT LOOKS LIKE A FLOWER!"

Syndra thrust her hand towards the blanket and it unfolded itself, revealing something that was most definitely not a flower. She then glared pointedly at Diana.

The Scorn of the Moon was saved by the sound of someone knocking on the door.

Immediately, the trio scattered.

Diana dove behind the curtain drapes.

Syndra rushed into the cupboard beneath the sink.

Leona ducked behind a potted petunia.

Diana poked her head out. "Leona! What the hell are you doing?!"

"Blending in like my book told me!" Hissed the Radiant Dawn.

"What book?! You know what, I don't want to know. FIND A BETTER HIDING SPOT!"

Leona glanced towards the door. The knocking had stopped.

She jumped up and made a dash for the curtains, shuffling in next to her girlfriend who glared at her like, "I DIDN'T MEAN HERE!"

The door swung open.

"Vayne?" Someone called out. Someone male.

Leona and Diana looked at each other.

Syndra turned to her right, only to remember that she was hiding in a cupboard by herself. Feeling lonely, she stared at a pipe instead.

The sound of footsteps was painfully loud in the intruders' ears as the person shuffled around looking for something.

"... Not the bedroom..." He muttered to himself.

"... Not in the closet..." The sound of a door shutting accentuated the mutter.

"... Not by the porn magazines under the bed... Why does she even have those anyway..." A shuffling noise.

"... Not in the cupboard under the sink- wait, I haven't checked there yet..."

Syndra's eyes widened as footsteps grew closer and she prepped her magic, lamenting that Leona was too far to use as a human meat shield.

"Wait! Maybe I left it by the TV...!" Footsteps quickly hurried away, and the mage let out a breath of relief.

"Shit!" The sound of something breaking and a distressed cat noise because why not.

"Aha!" Scraping noises, and then a door opened and shut.

*silence*

"WHAT WAS LUCIAN DOING IN VAYNE'S ROOM?!" Diana, Leona, and Syndra exclaimed at the same time, coming out of their respective hiding places and noting a broken lamp by the TV. That explained the shattering noise.

"I DON'T KNOW!" They chorused in answer to each others' question.

(Well obviously Lucian was looking for his guns. DUR.)

...

...

...

"Split up and look for clues?" Diana suggested.

"Bedroom!" Syndra called.

"Living room!" Leona cried.

"... Kitchen then." Diana huffed.

A few minutes later...

"Nothing." The Scorn of the Moon called out, pulling her head out of the refrigerator, "Except for some leftover casserole."

"Yuck. Only thing I found was a crossbow bolt." Leona said, toying with said crossbow bolt.

"Syndra! Find anything?" Diana yelled.

"Yeah! Just give me a second..."

...

...

...

Syndra walked out of the bedroom with two objects in her hands. She held up one of them with a grimace. "Well, I think the Night Hunter is on her period. Also, this is a really weird tampon. And there are a couple of guys' clothes in her closet."

Leona had a strange look on her face. "... That's not a tampon."

Syndra cocked her head to the side. "You sure? It was sitting next to this remote." She held up the other object.

Diana's eye twitched. "... Syndra? That. Is. Not. A. Tampon."

The Dark Sovereign snorted. "Sure it isn't. If it's not a tampon, then what is i-" Her eyes widened. "... This isn't a tampon is it..."

Leona had a bemused expression on her face. "That's what we were trying to tell you."

"... EEEEEK GET IT OFF ME GET IT OFF MEEEEEEEE!"

"Syndra hold still!"

"Stop thrashing around!"

The 'objects' thumped onto the floor.

"AHHH COOTIES!"

"SYNDRA WE NEED TO PUT THAT BACK!"

"I AM NOT TOUCHING THAT!"

"SYNDRA LISTEN TO HER! VAYNE WILL KNOW IT'S MISSING!"

"VAYNE EWEWEWEWEWEW!"

"JEEZ SYNDRA HAVEN'T YOU EVER MA-"

"DIANA NOW IS **NOT** THE TIME!"

"COOTIESHELPI'MINFECTEDSOMEONEGETSORAKA!"

* * *

"Well that was a fail." Leona groaned, propping her feet up onto her coffee table.

Syndra shivered, wrapping her blanket tighter around herself. "Understatement of the century, Sunny."

Diana sighed. "Since that failed, I guess we're breaking into Talon's room?"

"Oh please, we didn't even get to go into Fiora's room." Leona argued.

Syndra glared straight at Leona, blazing violet irises locked onto warm amber. "I am not going anywhere NEAR the Demacian Wing again. EVER!"

"But...2400 RP..."

*stare*

"2400RP!"

*stare*

"BET! MONEY! RP! 2400!"

*stare*

"... Fine. Talon's room." Leona relented, looking away from the scorching gaze of the Dark Sovereign.

Diana high-fived Syndra.

* * *

Diana absolutely refused to be levitated again, and so the trio was standing in the Noxian Wing hallway, staring confusedly at the doors.

"I say we knock on a random door and ask." Leona suggested.

"Nuh-uh. What if we get Draven? I am not dealing with that buffoon after the night I've just had." Syndra snapped.

"Well do you have a better idea?"

"Do you?!"

"Guys." Diana cut in. "I've narrowed our choices down to 3."

She pointed to three side-by-side doors, each with the Du Couteau crest proudly displayed on the exterior.

"... Wow, that's not obvious at all." Syndra commented sarcastically. "Now we just have to figure out whose is whose."

"Katarina's is the middle one." Leona said immediately. When her companions looked at her for an explanation, she shrugged. "She's head of the house, wouldn't she be in the middle?"

"Logically, yes." Said Diana. "But they're assassins; well, at least Talon and Katarina are. If it was that simple, wouldn't they be _inviting_ other assassins into her room?"

"But they can handle themselves. Also, the Institute is a sanctuary."

Syndra snorted. "Doesn't mean people are safe." A sinister grin spread across her face, which the avatars of the sun and moon tried to ignore.

"... Anyways..." Diana looked away from the sovereign. "Cassiopeia would likely be by her sister, so if Katarina isn't the middle, then Cassiopeia would be the middle."

"Buuut, what if that's what they expect you to think?" Argued Leona.

"...Goddamned assassins and their goddamned mind games..." Diana muttered.

"Oh, you think this is bad? Try playing chess with Swain!" Syndra interjected.

"... Why the hell were you playing _chess_ with _Swain_?" Leona asked disbelievingly.

"Ditto." Tacked on Diana.

"... Long story." Syndra answered. "Don't want to talk about it."

...

...

...

"'Kay." Diana shrugged.

"So... Basically, in any scenario, Talon wouldn't be the middle?"

"But what if it's all reverse psychology and Talon is in fact the middle..."

"Then what if it's reverse reverse psychology? Wouldn't Katarina be in the middle?"

"... If you reverse reverse psychology, then it would be the original psychology, making the middle... Cassiopeia?"

"What?"

Syndra groaned and bopped herself on the head. _'I can't keep up with this anymore. It's too annoying.'_

She thrust her hand out and blew the left door off its hinges.

...

"Er... You couldn't have done that on our earlier expeditions?" Diana questioned the mage, who shrugged.

"Forgot?"

[line break]

"It's Talon's room, all right." Leona reported, looking up from her examination of the kitchen knives, a glowing purple orb in hand as a light source. The front door was back in place. Thankfully. Although it might've been on backwards.

"Agreed." Syndra called from the bathroom. "No tampons in here!"

"Men's clothes in the closet." Was the muffled broadcast from the bedroom. "Wait... Hey guys come take a look at this!"

Syndra and Leona shuffled into the bedroom. The latter shuddered at the color scheme.

Red. Red and black.

And posters. Of- of...

Leona shook her head. _'I must not think of it.'_

She made her way to the walk-in closet with Syndra. Three purple lights bobbed in the near dark.

Syndra merged the lights together with a wave of her hand. "What'd you find, baby?"

"... Baby?" Leona raised an eyebrow at the mage, who shrugged once again. She turned the questioning look to Diana, who was crouching by the shoe rack. The Scorn of the Moon sighed.

"Nickname. Phone. Strangling. Now shut it and look at this." She pointed to something behind the shoe rack. Something scaly and green.

Just then, the front door opened.

With her quick warrior reflexes, Leona pulled the closet door shut while Syndra extinguished the lights.

" _Why is this so familiar?!_ " Diana hissed as they huddled by the wall.

" _Ashe's room._ " Syndra responded.

Leona decided not to ask.

* * *

Phones drawn and recording, the Radiant Dawn, Scorn of the Moon, and Dark Sovereign listened to...

Talon.

Singing.

In the shower.

"LA LA DEE, LA LA DA... SINGING IN THE SHOWER!"

" _No shit, Dinger._ " Diana muttered.

" _Amen._ " Seconded her companions.

Suddenly, a very masculine shriek sounded through the air.

"CASS! HOLY SHIT! HOW DID YOU- HOW DID YOU-"

An evil cackle, and then:

"I used Kat's secret passage. Didn't know it led ssstraight into your bathroom..."

"Wait, Kat has a secret passage?"

"Hehehe what are you talking about. But anyways, enough talking~"

" _Holy fuck not this again..._ " Groaned Syndra. " _Can we please get out of here while they're in the other room?_ "

" _No... It's just getting to the good part._ " Diana whispered.

A crunching sound caused the mage to turn her head to the side and light up a tiny little orb.

" _DIANA! THE POPCORN?! HOW?!_ "

Leona extinguished the orb floating above the mage's palm by crushing it with her own. " _Does it matter?! Talon is cheating on Katarina... With her sister!_ "

" _Most definitely. Now let's get out._ " Diana agreed, smiling in the dark as she knew that her girlfriend couldn't see her.

 _'Hahaha! One more couple to add to my list... And Leona doesn't know about Katarina and Ashe. Talon is not a cheater... Is he?'_ She mused.

Syndra pressed her ear to the door and listened for sounds while slowly reaching for the doorknob. With a quick jerk, she opened the door and tumbled into the bedroom.

Leona and Diana followed suit. They all looked at each other, reading each others faces by the light of the bedside lamp. Syndra moved her hands around in some sort of sign language.

"..."

"..."

The Dark Sovereign threw her hands down in annoyance. _"Haven't you guys seen Mission Impossible'?!"_

Leona shook her head while Diana narrowed her eyes. " _That's not from Mission Impossible!_ "

" _Is too!_ "

" _No, it's from Spy Mage!_ "

" _... Riiight..._ "

The sound of the water shutting off prompted the trio to make a break for the living room door. It closed behind them (quietly) just as the bathroom door opened.

" _Window!_ " Leona pointed to a curtained window.

" _Door!_ " Diana pointed to the door.

" _Chandelier!_ " Syndra exclaimed. Her companions looked at her funny, and she held up her hands. " _What? I thought we were playing the random game..._ "

"..."

And so they left through the window.

* * *

One more harrowing tale to tell,

One more narrow escape.

One more trip to hell,

One more kinda sex tape.

One more adventure with friends,

One couple more I net.

One more time Syndra I commend,

One day more to win the bet.

* * *

(Don't mind the poem, it's how I was planning on tying up the chapter haha... Read the Author's Notes please.)

"Agent Shadow, what have you to report?"

"Not I, Amethyst. Vayne has reported a few missing magazines. They were apparently kept under her bed."

"Could these be our perps?" Chimed in another voice.

"Likely, Hawk." Answered Shadow.

"Wait a second, where are Agents Whispers and Amethyst?" Double Rainbow interrupted.

"Whispers is currently in a match," Answered Agent Amethyst. "Siren is... Occupied right now. Or was it the other way around..."

"Want me to go look for them?"

"No need, Double Rainbow. No need. We only need to keep searching. We will find these intruders, and they will be dealt with."

"How are you so sure that there is more than one, Amethyst?"

"Agent Hawk-eye, would you do something like this without your partner?"

"... Maybe..."

Agent Double Rainbow cut in, her silver armour shining under grey robes. "I saw only one shadow, however there very well may be more than one. We must always assume the worst, so that we may be pleasantly surprised when it is not the worst."

"Spoken like a true Demacian..." The figure next to Double Rainbow rubbed the Demacian's shoulder, smiling when Lux- I mean, Double Rainbow, flinched.

"What are you doing! I have a girlfriend!"

Everyone froze at the sound of approaching footsteps from the hallway.

"Can we meet back here in an hour? I have some info to share." Agent Hawk said quickly.

"Of course. Agent Nine, Agent Shadow, I want you as the decoys for today," Amethyst said, "Remember... We are the Seven."

"And we keep the balance."

...

...

...

The door opened.

Vi blinked and then walked out.

* * *

 **Authors Note(s): HIATUS INFO**

 **Regular Note's are not bolded. Important is bolded.**

Yes I am well aware of my update time.  
First of all, a **BIG THANK YOU to Kythil and lovepandasandanime** for being my amazing Beta's! Without them, this chapter would be even shittier than it already is! THEY BOTH HAVE AMAZING STORIES GO CHECK THEM OUT! [Srsly, that Luxerina lemon in 'Calibrations' ain't gonna read itself ;) plus you got that bromance in Blank Pages]  
Now I know I promised a twist, but that will be next chapter. God, I am TERRIBLE with keeping my promises.

 **Global Message starts now.**

 **Hey guys… So i'm thinking of quitting fanfiction.**

 **Jk haha. But I will be taking a short break.**

 **I don't know if you have noticed, but all of my projects have been put 'In Hiatus'. This is only until I feel like writing again.**

 **If you read any of my other stories, you may notice that everything has been updated. This is because I wanted to get this author's note out to you guys, so you didn't have to wonder about my update speed.**

 **Writing is a true passion of mine, but for now, I think I will take a break from it. I've been slaving over these latest updates; TIOLL took me 2 months to churn out that shitty 4000 word chapter, and I would rather update again in 5 months than give you quality like that while also stressing myself out. And it's stressful. I don't really want to write these stories anymore, so I will be taking a short break from them until I feel ready to delve into this humour mindset again. Plus, my life has just gotten plenty busier so I wouldn't even be able to find the time really to put fingers to keyboard and write chappies for you guys.**

 **That said, I will still check my PM's, reviews, Docx, and other things daily, so if you want to chat or ask for my Beta services, I'm still available!**

 **Lastly, I want to say that I'm sorry. It seems that some of you seem to genuinely enjoy my stories, to which I am eternally grateful, and I feel awful about stopping the updates, even if only for a temporary period :(**

 **This part of the author's notes will be the same for each of my stories. So if you want to read the story-specific ones, they will be in regular print above this one.**

 **Thank you for sticking with me up until this point; I have no words to thank you with, and I do hope that I continue to produce worthy content!**

 **Ending things on a positive note, I have a new poll on my profile; Snowdown Chaos is drawing to an end, which means that there will be a new story up sooner or later. Vote for the one you want to see uploaded! Or PM me if you must haha!**

 **Well, thanks again, and I'm so sorry. Best of luck in literature!**

 **~Creator0fWords**


	7. Chapter 6 Deleted Scene

"... Fine." The Lunari warrior grumbled. She opened her mouth to say more, but Leona covered her mouth with her hand and gestured for her to be quiet while Syndra flipped the lights off.

Lone footsteps echoed through the hallway outside, coming to a stop right outside their hideout.

...

...

...

Whoever was outside slowly walked away, and the hidden trio in the closet simultaneously let out a breath of relief.

"... Wait, why are we even hiding? We're not doing anything suspicious..." Leona realized, pulling her hand away from Diana's mouth.

Syndra rolled her eyes, turning the lights back on. "We are hiding in a closet. Three of us. And I am the _Dark Sovereign_. What are people going to think?"

"That we are having a threesome?" Diana said suggestively, smiling. The looks that were sent her way caused her to immediately raise her hands in a useless placating gesture. "Hey! It was a joke!"

"... Diana... Please refrain from telling jokes. You are terrible." Leona groaned, facepalming.

* * *

 **I just randomly decided to upload this while I was combing through my Docs. I had this deleted segment saved up, and so I decided to upload it, because why not?  
Updates are still not going to happen, although... Secret Project II and a very angsty Cait/Vi one-shot might be on the horizon...  
'Nuff said.  
Also, I got really sad when I saw all of 2 reviews for my latest chapter Cx seriously, those are my favorite things in the world hahahhaha totesnotplayingon theguilt o-o anyways, thanks for reading and sticking along for the ride!**

 **\- C**


	8. Compromise

**Chapter 7: Compromise**

Diana sat in front of a screen in the corner of her room, intently watching the match playing across it. Sunlight filtered into the room through white drapes, drawing lines across the wooden floorboards and illuminating the dust motes twirling gracefully through the air.

Syndra stuck her head over Diana's shoulder so that they were head to head. "Ah, spying on your girlfriend, I see."

The Lunari warrior jerked around, almost knocking over her yogurt.

"Spying? What. No."

Syndra smirked and plopped into the empty chair across the table, prompting Diana to subtly shift her head in order to see the screen better.

"You're watching a custom game. No one cares about those," the mage prodded, pointing a manicured finger at the screen behind her.

"I am doing no such thing!" Diana exclaimed frantically, eyes darting around. "I'm simply…"

Syndra leaned closer.

"Simply…?"  
"It's background noise!"

The mage cocked an eyebrow, and Diana continued.  
"Yes, background noise… While I… Clean."

"Clean," Syndra repeated disbelievingly, reclining back in her chair, one arm draped over the back. Diana hoped that she wouldn't kick her feet onto the table that she was 'cleaning' while suppressing a tell-tale blush.

"Yes, _clean_ … What the hell are you doing here, anyways!" The Scorn of the Moon exclaimed, quickly changing the subject. "Don't you have anything better to do than stalk me?"

Naturally, the Dark Sovereign ignored the question, "What, are you cleaning with your morning coffee? Your buttered toast? And why the hell are you drinking your coffee straight? You sure aren't."

"..." Diana glared at the intruder in her room.

Syndra ignored the glare. "Want some sugar?... I'll go get you some sugar." She stood up and floated towards the kitchen, much to the happiness of Diana who now had an unobstructed view of the screen just in time to see Draven start dance-taunting Azir.

And see Azir stab Draven through the leg with a spear.

Diana sent a prayer of thanks to the Moon. Draven's dancing was fucking horrible.

The sound of someone rummaging through her cupboard brought Diana's attention to the kitchen, where Syndra was attempting to open a locked drawer without the use of her magic. Surprisingly. Perhaps it was too early in the morning for even Syndra to be a destructive psychopath.

The mage froze for a second and glared at the ceiling.

 **Both hands go off the keyboard in surrender, What? It's true.**

Syndra's violet eyes glowed dangerously, as if prepared to blast someone from another dimension to shit.

… **Fine. You're not a destructive psychopath. Happy?**

The glowing subsided.

"Ugh," Diana groaned, unaware of the exchange that had just taken place. "Bottom left drawer, right side. And I take my coffee black, thank you very much. Help yourself though."

The mage found the specified drawer and yanked it open, grabbing a package of sugar. "Aw, Diana, why that look on your face? You look like Teemo put poison in your… _Straight_ coffee."

Diana muttered under her breath, "Maybe the fact that you barged into my room uninvited… again."

A look of faux horror plastered itself onto Syndra's face. "ME? Barge into your room uninvited? Why," In an overtly dramatic motion, Syndra ripped over the package of sugar, spilling half the contents onto the floor in the process, "I thought that we were practically friends! And practically friends can go into each other's rooms, no?"

…

Diana stared at her practically friend for a second, and then sighed, admitting defeat.

"You know what? Just… Just take a seat and have some toast."

The Dark Sovereign floated back over to the table and plopped into the chair across from Diana once more. The warrior sighed internally as Syndra's massive headpiece blocked the screen yet again. She didn't understand why the mage never took it off.

The aforementioned mage was glaring at the Lunari warrior now. " _Butter?_ Toast with _butter?_ What, are you trying to make me gain weight? You know, it's very hard to keep my **amazing** physique!"

Syndra pointed at her waist and cocked her head to the side, violet eyes narrowed.

Diana raised an eyebrow.

"You know, if you actually walked instead of floating everywhere, you might not have such a problem with butter."

The mage shrugged and dumped the remaining contents of the sugar packet into her mouth, chewing blissfully with her eyes closed.

Diana stared at her, both eyebrows now raised in disbelief.

"The sugar doesn't- you know what, never mind. Forget it. It's too early for this shit." She grabbed her mug and chugged some coffee, ponderous silver eyes locked on the screen where Leona and Azir were taking the midlane inhibitor tower.

Syndra's eyes slowly opened to see her partner in stalking practically drooling into her _straight_ (insert noise of disgust here) coffee.

 _(DISCLAIMER: I MYSELF HAVE NO OBJECTION TO STRAIGHT COFFEE. THE THOUGHTS AND WORDS EXPRESSED TOWARDS THE DRINK ARE THE SOLE OPINIONS OF THE PEOPLE SAYING/THINKING THEM.)_

 _-feels the angry glares subsiding. Sighs in relief-_

The Dark Sovereign followed Diana's line of sight to see a closeup of Leona attempting to defend Evelynn from a barrage of Ashe's arrows, her surfboard in her Pool Party outfit starting to freeze.

Syndra then focused in on the… chest, of the warrior, which was barely contained by the yellow tank top.

Seriously, how the hell were the Champions expected to fight with barely any clothing? And how was the enemy team supposed to counter, if there were just boobs and more boobs flying everywhere during a teamfight?

Having Ahri be chosen during 'One for All' was _not_ good when the opposite team was all male.

Major disadvantage for the male team, obviously.

"You know," Syndra said thoughtfully as the camera panned to the other team, "Sunny _does_ have some pretty nice knockers."

Diana's gaze snapped to the person sitting across from her, scorching Syndra with the fury and heat of a thousand moons.

(not as powerful as a thousand suns but you get the point.)

"Don't you even think about it," The Scorn of the Moon growled, eyes flashing as one hand twitched towards the _khopesh_ propped up against her chair and the other towards her coffee.

Syndra snorted.

"Calm your tits, Moon Moon. She's not my type. Although," A suggestive smirk found its home on her face, "If she came to me…" one of Syndra's fingers started tracing circles on the hard tabletop.

The lunar warrior glared at her partner in stalking, both hands closed around their respective targets. "Leona would never!"

…

A small shadow of uncertainty fell across Diana and she gripped the coffee tighter, the khopesh falling from her grip with a small _thud_ against the ground. Her eyes found her laughing, bloodstained girlfriend congratulating a battered Irelia on a triple kill.

"..."

Syndra glanced at the screen. And then her eyes darted back to it, lingering for a second on a certain Ionian…

She pinched herself under the table and then turned back to Diana.

' _Can't look… Diana will know…'_

She felt her eyes starting to slide back to the screen.

' _... Damn it, Moon Moon.'_

The mage pinched herself harder, forcing her eyes back to Diana, who, fortunately, had not been paying attention to her.

She sighed.

"Don't worry. She's loyal as a hound."

Diana looked at Syndra, who, for once, seemed completely serious. What she didn't know was that the mage was still pinching herself.

Her fists relaxed, and she took a sip of her now-cold coffee before speaking once more.

"So… You bored again?"

A wide and slightly sinister-looking smile broke out across Syndra's face, "Ah! So you noticed!"

Diana sighed, rubbing her temples. "Syndra… You're ALWAYS bored. And I seem to have the unfortunate job of alleviating that boredom now."

"Well, yes…" Syndra mused, tapping a finger thoughtfully against her chin, "Because, compared to the rest of the puny mortals here… You're actually somewhat interesting."

Diana got a strange and rather unpleasant vibe from those words, but shook it off.

"You know what? I'm going to take that as a compliment."

"VICTORY!" A female voice announced triumphantly.

Both Diana and Syndra turned to look at the screen, where it seemed that Leona's team had won by a landslide. Then they looked back at each other.

"So, what are we doing today?" Syndra asked, levitating a piece of buttered toast and spinning it around Diana's head.

* * *

 **Later…**

"I KNEW WE SHOULD HAVE GONE TO FIORA'S ROOM!" Leona yelled, standing up in anger and knocking the couch back two feet. "WHY THE FUCK DID WE GO TO TALON'S ANYWAYS!?"

Diana and Syndra shared a glance, the unspoken answer passing between them: " _We needed to find more couples."_

" _Plus,"_ Syndra added on, " _there was no fucking way that I was going back to the Demacian Wing."_

"... Errr…" Diana started awkwardly, shifting her position on the armchair around slightly, "Well, since we didn't want to go to Fiora's, Talon _was_ a safe be-"

"One, is a DEMACIAN. The other is a NOXIAN. Why the FUCK would they be together!?" Leona exploded, the light seeming to get brighter in the room.

"Jeez, calm down, Sunny." Syndra drawled, "Why couldn't you have been this… Enthusiastic last night? Did baby do something to you~?"

Diana and Leona both glared at the mage.

"Syndra… Not. Helping," Diana hissed.

"I agree. And what is it with that nickname, anyways?" Leona tacked on, turning her amber eyes on her girlfriend.

"I already told you: Phone, strangling, and almost dying. Now, can we please just calm down and discuss this like normal people?"

Leona huffed and then backed up a step to plop back down onto the couch, crossing her arms in anger.

"Good. Thank you, Leo." Diana said with a small smile. "Now, since someone else found out who Fiora was with first-"

"Never expected it to be _her_ …" Syndra interrupted in a low grumble. "... Thought she was straight... Thought they were _both_ straight."

The Scorn of the Moon shot her a glance, and Syndra quieted her muttering.

"Anyways. Since someone *cough* Wukong *cough* found out who Fiora was with, we don't get the money. Yeah?"

"Yeah." Leona and Syndra agreed sullenly.

"And since _we_ didn't find that couple, none of us get the point. Besides, it would be 1 point each which would just be the same as 0:0. Yeah?"

"Fine," Leona agreed, hugging one of the couch cushions.

"Good. Now, I got a match, so _please_ don't break anything, you two. _PLEASE._ "

She took the silence as acquisition and sighed to herself as she stood up and crossed to the door.

"Is it just me, or has she been acting different since her hair got cut?" Leona said to nobody in particular as soon as the door shut.

Syndra shrugged.

An awkward silence hung over the pair in the room.

"... So, you got any plans for today?" Leona asked, drumming her fingers on the cushion.

Syndra shrugged again.

"When does your contest end?"

"Uhh…" Leona thought for a second, mouthing numbers to herself. "... Tonight, I guess. Today's the last day to find new couples."

Syndra's eyes widened, her demeanor rigid and tight.

"... _T-Tonight?_ "

"Yeah, tonight."

The Dark Sovereign stared at the warrior sitting across from her. "You count the points … tonight?"

"... Yeahhh, I mean, that's what the last night is for…" Leona said slowly, unsure of where the conversation was headed.

"I-... You… Tonight." Syndra repeated, her voice small and completely out of character.

Leona was feeling worried until the mage asked, "Are you going to tell her about Irelia and I?"

Oh.

"Didn't we already go over this?" Leona asked carefully, choosing each word with an archer's precision.

"You never got to answer me last time," Syndra responded, voice now hard and steely.

"So tell me: Are. You. Going. To. Tell. Diana."

Leona hesitated.

On the one hand, her moral compass was telling her to withhold the information from Diana- after all, Syndra was risking her whole _life_ to keep the secret from getting out. However crazy and murderous the Ionian mage was, she was still brave and noble when it came to those she cared about.

On the other hand, Leona _really_ didn't want to do Kog'Maw duty.

She knew that she was being selfish, but she just couldn't change her feelings.

"... I… I… Don't know," She answered truthfully.

This time, instead of strangling the Radiant Dawn, Syndra merely looked down at her hands, a numb feeling inside of her.

' _All this work… For nothing.'_ She thought, fear tearing through her veins. ' _Ionia will find out, and Plaything will lose her job… Possibly her life…'_

And suddenly, the fear turned to rage and resolve.

Slowly, Syndra's head rose, eyes glowing violently with power.

"You will not tell her," she said, voice echoing with that strange double timbre.

This time, Leona was unafraid. Syndra couldn't hurt her without serious repercussions. "How about we cut a deal, then."

Violet eyes dimmed slightly. "Deal?"

"I won't tell Diana if I don't have to. If I can beat her without having to tell her about you and Irelia, I won't do it."

"But… Today's the last day, isn't it? There's no way you can beat Diana. I worked with her, after all."

"Well, I have to try, I guess," Leona answered, feeling something like a mix of pity and regret in her stomach.

Both knew that Syndra could cheat and tell Leona about the other couples- but there simply wasn't enough time for the Radiant Dawn to gather the evidence, nor were they cheaters. Well, maybe Syndra would cheat, but Leona wouldn't.

Syndra stared for a moment longer at Leona, and then stood up abruptly.

"What if I bought you some more time."

"Wait-what?" The Solari warrior stood up as well. "How would you buy us time? Blackmail Zilean?! Diana's Kog'Maw duty is tomorrow!"

Syndra stared for a moment longer at Leona, and then promptly floated out of the room.

The Radiant Dawn stared after the retreating figure of the mage.

Truth was, she'd already made up her mind.

* * *

Diana was just stepping into the post-game lobby when it happened.

"Ahem. Attention, all champions," A very disgruntled-sounding male voice boomed from the walls. "It has come to our attention that the items on Summoner's Rift have all been replaced… _AGAIN."_

Jarvan, standing next to Diana, gave a short bark of laughter and then turned to Shyvana.

"You think it was Fizz again?"

The voice continued. "The items have all been replaced with… *sigh*... _Cookies._ "

Morgana perked up. "So _that_ was where all my cookies went!"

Diana's eyes widened and she looked to the wall, as if she could see beyond it to the speaker.

Who kept talking.

"The perpetrator is none other than Syndra, the Dark Sovereign." The speaker said in a very bored tone, as if he'd rather be doing something else.

Surprised gasps sounded through the room, however, and Gangplank even dropped the orange he'd been tossing into the air… which Miss Fortune promptly shot to show off.

"Because the items still function as they normally would, matches will not be cancelled, much like last time. As punishment, the Dark Sovereign will switch places with the Scorn of the Moon in the Kog'Maw rotation. She will now be going tomorrow, as Quinn of Demacia's Wings is already inside Kog'Maw's room and nobody wants to go in there to rescue- I mean, bring her out, until the end of the day."

Diana stood still, hardly believing her ears.

Nami elbowed her, "Damn, you got lucky! Again!"

The warrior turned to the Tidecaller.

"Yeah, I guess…"

Various other champions all shot her glances ranging from congratulatory to jealous as she made her way back to her room.

* * *

Leona was sitting out in the gardens when the announcement came through. Needless to say, she was shocked.

' _... She really did buy me time.'_ Leona realized, a pit of shame and guilt opening up inside of her. ' _She somehow managed to time it so that she'd be switched with Diana and not Quinn… She bought us time.'_

' _All for Irelia.'_

Resolve hardened inside of her.

' _I won't let that sacrifice go to waste.'_

She stood up abruptly, startling Elise, who was crouched beside her next to the bench, peering through the leaves of a nearby bush with a Stalker's Blade clutched in her hand.

Leona decided not to ask.

* * *

Since the library had worked out so well for her in the past, Leona decided to try it again right after grabbing a quick lunch consisting of a ham sandwich with mustard and a bottle of water.

Not really filling, but good for a quick meal.

Walking into the quiet chamber filled with books, Leona suddenly felt lost.

' _Where the hell am I supposed to start?'_ She thought, glancing around.

There were a bunch of summoners and a few other champions around: Janna, Nasus, Ashe, and…

Graves?

' _Graves? The heck is he doing in the library of all places?'_ Leona thought to herself, staring at the thief surrounded by a sea of beanies and reading a romance novel of all things.

Deciding to keep an eye on him, Leona gravitated towards the section closest to where Graves was sitting and started browsing the books, barely registering the titles. Her eyes kept flicking back towards the Outlaw, whose back was turned towards her.

After a few minutes, Graves shut his book and stood up to stretch.

Leona quickly grabbed a random book off the shelf and flipped to somewhere in the middle of the book. The Outlaw turned to look behind him and saw Leona, seemingly entranced in a book. He raised his eyebrow a little when he saw the title of the book, but didn't say anything.

The Radiant Dawn didn't notice, and was instead thinking hard.

Graves, reading a romance novel?

She was sure that something was going on, and was determined to find out what it was. She had a feeling that Graves was up to something. Something to do with the book tucked under his arm.

So when the man walked out of the library after checking out his book, Leona followed with the book she'd been 'reading'. Janna suppressed a giggle as she walked by, and Cassiopeia, who was just walking- err, _slithering_ , into the library, gave Leona a very strange smile. The warrior hid her shivers.

Nasus smirked and gave her a knowing look as he checked out the book she was holding.

It wasn't until after she was outside of the library did Leona finally look down at the title in her hands. When she did, she almost dropped the book.

Fifty Shades of Grey.

' _Shit.'_

The looks thrown her way suddenly made sense.

Cheeks burning, she ran back to the library and shoved the book in between the doors.

* * *

Turned out that Graves spent most of his time at- you guessed it.

The bar.

Dinner had long passed and Leona was just about to quit and call it a day when something interesting finally happened.

Twisted Fate walked in.

Everyone knew of their history- a story of betrayal and hurt. Graves had been after the Card Master since he first arrived at the Institute.

But with the cavernous halls and the number of people, the two rarely saw each other off the Rift.

Especially since Twisted Fate, despite much denial, made a concerted effort to avoid Graves.

Brown eyes met shadowed green ones.

"Fate," growled Graves, obviously drunk as he slammed his mug back onto the table.

The Cardmaster ignored him and instead went to sit two seats away from Leona at the counter.

The Radiant Dawn sipped carefully at her martini and shifted around in her seat. Her butt was getting awfully numb.

A minute or two passed in peace, and Twisted Fate had just received his drink from Gragas when a body shook the counter.

"EY. LOOK AT ME, YA BASTARD!" slurred Graves, brown eyes narrowed as he glared at the man sitting at the bar counter.

Leona discreetly shuffled down three seats, right to the end of the counter. Gragas glanced her way but didn't say anything as he poured a Graggy Ice for Katarina, who was sitting on the opposite end of the counter and eagerly watching the two men as if waiting for a fight.

Fate stayed silent, sipping his drink calmly.

"HEY!" Graves roared, thumping his fist on the hard wooden countertop and shaking all the glasses on it.

The Cardmaster still didn't say anything, even as his drink sloshed all over his clothing.

"LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKIN' TA YA, YA NO GOOD SONOFA BITCH!"

Slowly, Twisted Fate raised his eyes to behold Graves, red-faced and angry.

"What is it, Malcolm?" He asked flatly, fingers absently-mindedly playing around with a king of hearts card.

"I'LL TELL YA WHAT IT IS. YOU LEFT ME FOR FUCKING DEAD THAT NIGHT! FUCKING DEAD!" Graves roared, and even Riven, seated in the corner, looked up.

"I had to do it," Fate said, pain layering his words. "You don't understand."

" _I_ DON'T UNDERSTAND? _YOU_ DON'T UNDERSTAND!" The Outlaw blustered, trembling with fury. "WE WAS PARTNERS, YOU AND I. FUCKIN' PARTNERS. AND THEN YOU-"

"Ok, calm down, yer drunk boy," Gangplank said, coming up behind Graves. "Why dontcha-"

Graves turned and slammed his fist into the pirate's face, sending him reeling onto the ground.

Gragas finally decided to intervene.

"OUT! OUT! NO FIGHTING IN MY BAR!" He roared, pointing at the door.

The punch had apparently gotten Graves into a bloodthirsty mood, because the next thing he did was sock Twisted Fate in the stomach, sending the thief tumbling onto the floor.

Groaning in pain, the Cardmaster latched onto Graves' wrist and in a flash of purple light, both disappeared.

* * *

Leona sighed as she trudged to the bakery at 11pm at night.

The least she could do for Syndra was buy her some of her favorite cookies, she figured. The late night cookie trip was also to distract her from the failure that was her day.

Thank the Gods that Morgana didn't close until 12.

As she headed back to the Institute, a flicker of movement in a side alley caught her attention.

Curious, Leona pressed herself flat against the wall and craned her head around.

There, in the flickering light of a few golden cards, were Twisted Fate and Graves, both sporting bruises and bloody cuts on their faces.

Graves was immobilized by six of Twisted Fate's infamous snare cards, each pinning him through his clothes to the wall.

Eyes wide, Leona ducked behind a large trash can and peeped her head over the top.

Thankfully, the two outlaws weren't paying much attention to the mouth of the alley.

Straining to hear, the Radiant Dawn could just barely make out the words…

"I'm sorry, ok? I meant to go back for you, I really did…" Twisted Fate was saying, "But then Gustav, he knocked me out. Dragged me away, and told me that there was nothing we coulda done ta save you."

"Bullshit," Graves growled. "You saved yer own hide. Ya never woulda come back fer me."

"That's where you're wrong, Malcolm." Fate said softly, eyes lowered. "I cared for you- I _care_ for you. I care what happens ta you. When I heard you was alive, I robbed a bank for ya."

Leona snorted. What a way to celebrate.

"Bull. Shit."

"What do I have ta do for you to forgive me?!" Twisted Fate exclaimed. "What, you want me ta steal you the panties of every girl in the League?"

Graves gave a snort of laughter, "I'd love to see you try. And get gutted."

Fate growled, "Malcolm, I swear it on my honour- on my _life_. I tried to go back for you, and I'm sorry, alright? I'm so fucking sorry that I couldn't fucking SAVE YOU! That I couldn't stop you from being tortured, but you know what? The thought of you being tortured was torture for me too."

Finally, Graves' eyes softened. "... It… It was?"

And then Fate leaned forward to press his lips against Graves'.

Leona had to stifle a scream of joy as she fumbled for her phone.

Twisted Fate pulled back, and Graves smiled a little.

"I'm sorry for hitting you, I guess," He said gruffly.

They laughed and kissed again, the glow in the golden cards fading out.

Perhaps the night wasn't such a bust after all.

* * *

 **Authors Note(s):**

Merry Christmas! I worked my ass off to get this chapter to you by today, and even bypassed the Beta stage while editing late at night. So hopefully this chapter doesn't suck ass, even though I know it's rushed.

That being said, a clean and edited version will be published soon, so keep your eyes out for that!

So sorry for the long delay! My fanfic juices were running kinda low, but I did manage to squeeze enough together for this… Hopefully.

AlsoIquiteLeaguepleasedon'tkillmethatisanotherreasonwhythiswassohardtowrite…

I know this was more angsty than what I usually write, but my mood lately has also been darker than when I started this story, so hopefully you forgive me ^^;

THANK YOU. SO, SO, SO MUCH FOR STICKING BY. FOR REVIEWING, BECAUSE THAT MAKES MY FREAKING DAY, AND FOR FOLLOWING, (100 followers holy shite x 100! I was sooo sooo happy! THANK YOU!) AND FOR FAVING (Is that even a word?) I LOVE YOU ALL!

 **A big thank you as well to my amazing Beta's, lovepandasandanime and Kythil. The first part of the chapter stems from a RP sesh I had with Kythil, actually xP**

So, happy holidays!

Best of luck in League and Life,

~ Creator


	9. --Update--

Hey, I know this is technically against the rules of FF, but this is just an update to let you all know that:

A) this story is not dead

B) I am alive

C) Updates will be happening

And D) thank you so much for continuing to support this story. It means a lot to me; really.

Sorry if you thought this was an update :/

Enjoy your day, and happy holidays

\- C


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